He licked his lips and his forehead pressed into lines. “Jesse,” he breathed. “God, I’m so sorry, but it wasn’t what you think—”
God, I wanted to slap him!
“What part of that wasn’t what I think, Cazz?!” I shoved the words at him through gritted teeth, dashing away the tears that wouldn’t leave me alone. “What part of that wasn’t a fucking knife to my heart?”
“The part where I made her leave because even though I thought you were with Rake, I couldn’t stop loving you. And when I came…&rdquo
~ CASIMIR ~I was trembling when she fell into my arms, still shaking when I picked her up and carried her to the bed so carefully, afraid she might actually shatter in my arms. When I got her there, I murmured to her to just rest and breathe. And when she sank into the bed, her head on the pillow, drawing her knees up to her chest, I just curled myself around her—around both of them, I reminded myself.And even though everything was awful, and I was sick with the pain I’d put her through, it was such a blinding relief that she hadn’t run, that she was still here and letting me touch her.I sent a hurried prayer up to God that all these
~ CASIMIR ~There was silence in the link for a moment. Then Rake’s voice came through just a little bit hushed, ‘Wow, okay. Thanks.’‘I mean it.’‘I can tell.’‘But?’ I asked with my teeth gritted.‘But…’ He hesitated for a minute, then sighed. ‘Do you still want me to be the challenger? Or is that just going to make this worse?’‘No. I… I need to hear what you
~ JESSE ~Over the day that followed that confrontation with Cazz I completely lost track of time. We spent most of that day in bed sleeping and healing. Cazz had conversations with different wolves through the link while I was sleeping, but allowed no one but Maya into the room. Even the servants bringing us food had to stay outside. He’d go to the door to get the tray and warn them all to stay away.He did let Maya in to check me every few hours, which was ridiculous when he was the one who’d been shot. At some point, I refused to let her examine me again until he was getting examined by her too.Interesting that Maya’s visits grew further apart after that.Cazz and
~ JESSE ~His touch quickened, adding his thumb to massage my most sensitive flesh as he leaned more and more of his weight onto me, his hand cupped over my head to keep me in place as his breathing grew rough.Somehow, I ended up with my hands under that shirt, sliding up his sides. And when he rubbed harder with his thumb, I arched and gripped him hard—too hard. Right over his newly-scarred wound.He flinched, but hushed me when I sucked in and started babbling about how sorry I was.“It’s nothing anymore, Love,” he murmured, taking my lips mid-apology and sucking on my tongue when I tried to keep talking.I was torn, worried I’d hurt him, but wanting him. And he was
~ JESSE ~An hour later, when my body was no longer trembling and Cazz had his own under control, he took me to the bathing room and we bathed together. He ran the water and got the soap and towels and kept growling at me to just rest when I tried to help.Stepping into the hot water was so wonderful, I groaned and I felt a jolt in him through the bond. But he was sweet and nudged me forward in the bath, then stepped in behind me, keeping me between his knees so I could lay back against his chest. Of course, in that position I could feel him getting hard, but he ignored it, and kept kissing my shoulder, cupping my stomach, and talking to the baby, which made me emotional in a good way. So it was hard, when we got out and dried off, knowing that we had to burst this bubble.Other than Cazz flinching from me gripping his s
~ JESSE ~I looked at the two submitted males, bending at the waist so their heads were well below their waists, and I was shocked.Were they offering that to Cazz, or to me?It all happened in seconds, so I found myself watching them over my shoulder, chewing on my lip.Then we turned and there were three servants, one of them a female who clearly managed others, because she had the big loop of keys at her waist that only the Lead servants carried.She was speaking with two of the younger servants, but she turned to look when we stepped into view… and had exactly the same response as the guards had.“Cazz, what’s—”
~ CASIMIR ~“…The first priority has to be solidifying the hierarchy,” Harn, the oldest of the males, growled. “Without clarity on that, even loyal wolves might be swayed—and could be weakened if they’re uncertain of their positions. We can’t face a confrontation with another pack, or even the humans, while the rankings are so in flux. We were already shaky because of the Selection debacle. Now this?”I ground my teeth.“While the safety and security of the pack and the Queen must be our first priority, I agree that we have to give time to bringing the new leaders forward. And quickly. It’s a show of strength to those off the mountain if we are seen to still be
~ JESSE ~“…what we do know is that we need to focus on the future, not the past.”Cazz’s words were simple, firm, assertive. And they were right. I knew that. I knew it in my bones. It was advice I’d given and reminded myself of countless times in my life.There was nothing to be gained by letting the past drag me back.But when that thought came out of Cazz’s mouth, my heart stuttered, just for a second. It made my breath catch and Cazz caught it, and tensed.As the men around the table continued discussing the best way forward, his worried eyes cut to meet mine.‘Jesse,