Chapter Forty-Two

Aurora heaved a heavy sigh once more, obviously trying her best to control her frustration. She did not know why she had to say those words. She did not know why she had to tell it to his face, but deep down she was exhausted, overwhelmed, hopeless that her marriage is nothing but a confusing state of affairs and all she wanted was clarity instead of confusion.

“Alright,” she finally blurted. “I needed time away from you to rewire my brain and consciously remind myself that you do not want to be in this marriage. That you are here to ensure the company is in good hands for the future. That, it is the main purpose of this union. To provide myself some clarity. I’m sorry if occasionally I would want some time away from you. It is easier for me to do what I need to do.”

She spoke it so gently, so softly there was not a hint of anger there. She looked at him straight in his eyes, and after those words, she gave him a brief smile. It was almost like she is resigning to her fate. He heard her excuse herself and he watched her go upstairs while he stayed rooted on the spot, not knowing how to feel or react to what she just said. She was not crying, she did not even yell or even raise her tone of voice. But damn, hearing her admit what goes on in her internally, mentally and emotionally, he unexpectedly hurt for her, it drilled straight into his conscience.  

After preparing one of the guest rooms in the cottage, which was just adjacent to where the masters bedroom she was currently occupying, she went straight to her room, closed the door, and sat at the edge of the bed. There, she heaved a heavy sigh and just stared at the fire place. She continued to stare without seeing it but she started when she felt hot tears run down her face. She heard footsteps outside her door, and immediately wiped her tears with the back of her hands. She heard the footsteps stop right outside her door, and after a few minutes hear it retreat to the hallway, she began to relax. She was disappointed he did not choose to knock, but then again, what did she expect?

The next morning, when she arose from the bed, she found a note that was slipped at bottom of the bedroom door. She picked up the note and recognized immediately his handwriting. It says:

“I’m sorry I imposed on your space last night.

I’ve taken my leave and did not want to wake you. Take all the time you need.

See you in London.  

J”

Reading his note, the tension, the disappointment, the frustration, it all just came to her and she finally just let it all out. Her tears were floodgates now, and as she sat herself in one of the chaises, she just let it all go. For him to leave her alone when she asked for it, why does she feel so alone and so hurt? He gave her what she asked of him, didn’t he? Then why does she feel so defeated?

“You what?” Sascha mouthed over the phone almost choking on his coffee. “You showed up last night and now you just left because she told you she needed time away from you?”

“I mean yeah, she has resigned herself to our situation. And I told her that I did not want to complicate our situation even further. Confusing her would only make it worse. Anyway, I’m staying in the London townhouse, as we have some engagements to attend in a few days time.”

“What you should be doing is wooing her, not abandoning her, you ass...” Sascha irritably retorted.

“It is what she wanted, the space. I’ll let her have her space,” Jared responded. “For now...”

“Ahhhh... I assume you do have a plan...”

“She needs time, and I also need time,” he added. “we shall see in the couple of weeks,”

“Yeah yeah, whatever man.” Jared nonchalantly replied. “I’ll deliver her majesty to you then.”

Did he have a plan? He was not sure entirely. Damn, he was not even sure what he wanted to happen for certain. He needed to get his head straight. What was she to him? What was he to her? She said she needed time away from him to think, to rewire her brain specifically. Rewire from what? What exactly was Aurora trying to say? All of a sudden he is all dumb and stupid. All he can do now is shake his head in confusion.

The next day in London, he was almost certain that Aurora would be showing up in their townhouse any time and they will settle their issues.

It did not happen.

Following day, he neither heard nor seen any of her shadow near London or their townhouse. Third day, he tried calling the estate and found out she was now staying with her cousins in Kensington. Jared was now livid, and yet he still did not have a plan.

It took her seven days and 12 hours, Jared counted. It did not take her a few days, she took her sweet time for exactly seven days, 12 hours and 15 minutes. By the time she arrived in their London Townhouse, Jared was on the brink of strangling her. He anticipated a few days of waiting time he did not expect it to be a full week. It was incredible.

She arrived sometime after lunch and Jared was in the office room of the house when he heard her come in along with Sacha and her newly minted assistant Clara. He stood from behind the desk, and walked towards the open door, leaned against it, his hands in his pockets, waiting for her to acknowledge his presence.

“We did confirm brunch with Oxford team tomorrow, is that correct Clara? he heard her speak.

“Yes, miss all is confirmed, at approximately 10:30H”, her secretary affirmed. The assistant took notice of his demeanor at the office door and greeted “good afternoon Mr Rickford”. That’s the only time Aurora allowed herself to lay eyes on him. And to his utter shock, she merely acknowledged him with a slight nod and said, “Jared.” Then off she went to the living room her secretary trailing behind her. He noticed the staff carrying her luggage towards the vacant room on the other side of the house, and he immediately flagged it.

“Where you going with those luggage?” he asked the footman who was carrying suitcases. “The room connecting mine is this way,” confusion quite evident in his voice. It was Sasha who responded on the young footman’s behalf.

“Her majesty instructed us that she prefers to occupy the same room whenever she was staying in this town house when her father was still alive. Its familiarity gives her comfort, it seems.” Sacha explained.

“I see,” Jared merely acknowledged. Who was he to question her familiarity? “The only thing she is not familiar with is me”, he murmured, which Sasha merely responded with a raised eyebrow. Well, who’s fault was that, he silently mused. His by the mile. And with that, he decided to shut up and just went back to his office hoping to lick his wounded pride.

Aurora on the other hand, has decided on setting clear boundaries when it comes with her and her devillishly gorgeous husband-in-name-only. She better use those specific words when talking about her husband so as to not get swept off her feet by having any unrealistic ideas or fantasies about his potential as a life long partner. She simply cannot allow herself to humiliate herself all over again by allowing hope in her tiny head, then be rejected when she starts getting close. This marriage of hers is a business transaction, she reminded herself. Nothing more. The early she accepted that, the better their lives will be, and easier to let go when the time comes.

These boundaries, she already subtly set without announcing to her sexy husband, with the help of Clara and yes, Sasha. They already communicated her future appointments and schedules to Renata way ahead and the major change - though it is highly doubtful that Jared would even notice - was that she and he shall not be in the same city as much as possible. With the exception of critical board meetings, special events, gala dinners where a plus one is necessary for a “united front”, neither of them shall stay in the same roof breathing the same air in the same city at approximately 70% of the time during this marriage. If there was one thing she realized during her private hiatus at the cottage for the last week is that she cannot be miserable in the entire duration of her marriage. Her husband’s hot and cold behaviour towards her was not something that she needed to figure out. She was a grown woman, with a profession that only few women can dream about, and an inheritance so vast it span generations. She was not a damsel in distress, and she need not figure out a husband who still cannot decide if he wanted her or not for real. Well, if that is the case, then she will figure herself out for him and remove herself from his orbit as silently and as deliberately as she is able.