Chapter 4 - The Art Of Eye Contact

“Ugh, how long before we arrive at wherever the hell you’re taking me?” I said and scratched my kneecap. My feet are also starting to get sore. I was so busy today preparing for the pageant and making sure everything is perfect, so I’m really tired right now.

“I’m sorry, is the princess not used to long walks so she’s exhausted already?” He said sarcastically, I glared at him. “Chill, we’re almost there.” He said and laughed at my reaction at his silly “joke”.

We walked a couple more minutes, I stopped when he also stopped walking, meaning we’ve already arrived.

Huh? I was immediately confused when I realized where he brought me. “The cemetery? Are you being serious right now?” I asked him while raising an eyebrow. Instead of giving me a proper answer, he just smiled and grabbed my arm to pull me inside.

Once we’re already in the cemetery, we were walking again, probably looking for a specific spot. “More walking. How lovely.”

“Will you please stop complaining? Do you want me to piggyback you or what?” He scowled at me so I rolled my eyes. “This better be worth it.” I replied.

“But seriously though. Why would you bring me to a freaking cemetery? It’s seriously giving me the chills.” I said and wrapped my arms around my body, trying to feel warmer. I don’t know if it actually did get colder, or maybe it’s just because of the scary vibes I’m getting from being around here. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m not usually the type to get scared easily, but I don't normally go to cemeteries at night!”

I was about to rant more when he took off his jacket and handed it to me. I stared at it for a couple seconds before finally taking it from him. I actually don’t want to take it since I suddenly got shy, but I took it anyway since I don’t want him to feel embarrassed if I reject it. He’s being a gentleman, I decided to just appreciate that since he doesn’t really look like the gentleman type, to be honest.

I was looking at his back turned away from me. He handed me his jacket without looking directly at me, without even saying a word too. For some reason, that made me smile. His jacket also kinda smells like him. I wonder what his perfume is? Wait, why am I so familiar with his scent? We’re not even that close.

I bumped on his back when he suddenly stopped walking. We stopped at this high ground part of the cemetery, almost like a little hill. I wasn’t even aware that we were climbing it. It wasn’t that high though, so that’s probably why I didn’t realize it at all.

“What are we doing here?” I asked, and as usual, he didn’t answer. He’s been talking to me less and less. He just looked at me and gave me a sly grin, and then he laid on the grass and stared at the night sky. He looked at me again and patted the spot beside him, motioning me to lay down too.

“Whatever, this is so silly.” I laughed and laid beside him. I didn’t want to since I don’t want to get dirt on my beautiful dress, but I just used his jacket as a cover so I won’t get too dirty.

“Isn’t it beautiful?” He suddenly spoke. I looked up at the sky since I realized that he brought me here to stargaze. I was mesmerized and my jaw literally dropped from amazement.

The stars look so beautiful. And the moon.. it looked as if it was smiling at us. For some reason, in this spot, the stars seem to appear bigger and brighter, compared to how they seem in our backyard, where me and my friends usually stargaze. It’s so beautiful, I wanted to grab my phone and snap a photo but I didn’t want to ruin the moment for us.

I took my eyes away from the sky and I stared at him instead. He looks happy, calm, at peace. He always looks so serious, and kind of intimidating. Even the night we first talked at the cafe, he looked like a cold and mean person, even though he was actually being nice that time. I was caught off guard when he suddenly looked at me too. I didn’t take my eyes off of him, though. “Do you like it?” He asked and smiled, like a genuine, real smile, not a mischievous or sarcastic smile.

“Yeah.” I said and looked back up, he did too. “How can you be so mean to me the other day, and then just go back to being sweet like the first day we met?”

“I’m not being sweet. I wanted to go here but I didn’t want to be alone. I’m doing this for me, not for you.” He denied. I just laughed it off, I don’t want to argue about that one.

“Why bring me, though? Don’t you have other friends?” I can feel his eyes on me so I look back at him. He quickly shifted his gaze, not wanting to make eye contact.

“I.. I remember seeing you read a book about stars the other day at the library.” Oh. So he was paying attention even though he barely looked at me. He even noticed what book I was bringing at that time. “I just thought that maybe you liked stargazing too.” Well, I do love stargazing, but I was holding that book to study for an exam.

“Thank you for bringing me here.”

It was silent. We were both just appreciating the beauty of the celestial bodies. It was the type of silence that wasn’t awkward. No one was talking, we were both just staring at the sky, but it felt really peaceful and this moment is just too beautiful.

“Hey, I noticed the book you were reading the other day too.” I said to catch his attention. He sat up and reached his hand to me, I took it and he helped me get up too. “The Art Of Eye Contact, was it? I’ve read that book too. What part are you on?”

“That part when the male protagonist left his life in the city to chase after a girl who clearly doesn’t give a damn about him. It’s stupid, if you ask me.” He answered casually.

“Hey, I think that was romantic!” I replied, opposed to his opinion.

“Nah, it was dumb. Why chase after someone who doesn’t value your efforts? And besides, the girl already has a boyfriend and is living a great life away from him, away from the city. Chasing after her would just bother her and it would be a chance to destroy the life she’s always wanted. If you love someone, would you really do that?” He asked and raised an eyebrow. I rolled my eyes at him, not really knowing how to answer. Okay, maybe he’s right, it was a little stupid, but they’re just so cute together!

“You do know they end up marrying each other in the end, right?” I informed him.

“Yeah, I kinda figured. It is fiction after all.” He made a face, as if he’s close to the guy protagonist and is disappointed in his actions.

“If you hate it so much, why read it?“

“Who said I hate it? I enjoy reading books where the main character is different from my personality. I think it’s no fun when I’m too similar to a character, it would be like I’m reading a story about myself, when I’m reading to escape the reality of my life.” Oh, he thinks deeply. Not expecting that from him, to be honest. I mean, it’s not that he looks dumb, but he just doesn’t look like the “smart, bookworm” type either.

“We’re different. I like reading books where the main character is like me, because I imagine myself being in her position. It feels great too, you know!” He laughed at me because of how excited I sounded while saying that. I just smiled. There’s something about his laugh that’s so beautiful and special, I just can’t figure out what it is, I mean aren’t all laughs just the same?

“Yeah, sounds cool too.” He said and playfully played with my hair, I glared at him and he laughed at me again because of that. I spent so long fixing my hair because I wanted to look pretty even though I wasn’t a contestant at the pageant!

“Don’t get offended, ‘kay?” I took a deep breath, thinking of how I can say what’s in my mind without sounding judge-y. “You don’t really look like the type to read books.”

He laughed at what I said, “What, because I’m a guy?”

“Yes, and not just a regular guy, you look like… well, er, a tough guy.” I wasn’t sure if tough was the right word but I didn’t want to describe what I think of him beyond that because I might say the wrong words.

“Getting judgmental aren’t we, Montgomery?” He said and smirked, my eyes went wide. I didn’t want to give him that impression! He doesn’t look offended though, so I guess I’m good? Maybe he’s just messing with me.

“Hey, I meant no offense. And stop calling me that. Just call me by my first name, Calista, okay?” I said. No one really calls me Montgomery so I’m not used to it, and I don’t think it sounds good either.

“Have you talked to your dad?” My lips parted when he asked about him out of the blue. I just realized that I never talked to anyone about my recent encounter with my father, he’s the only one who knows. “Too soon?” He asked when he noticed I spaced out a little.

“No, no it’s fine. I, um, haven’t talked to him yet.” I said and scratched the back of my head, thinking if I should talk to my dad or not. “But I shouldn’t talk to him, right? I mean, what would I say? If anything he’s the one who should reach out to me and apologize for what he did.”

“Damn right.” He said and smiled at me. “I’m glad you realize that. I know he’s your father but from what you told me, it seems like he doesn’t give a crap about what he did, so why should you care if you offended him by choosing yourself.” I smiled back at him. It’s so crazy, I don’t know if I like his advice or not. It’s like he’s telling me to cut off my dad, which I’m not sure if I like the idea of not talking to him, but at the same time I don’t want to chase after him. He left me.

“Hey, you should tell me about your family.” I faced him and pouted.

“I already did. At the cafe, remember?”

“No, but that’s like, just a glimpse of everything. Tell me more.” He smirked at me. That smirk made me think if I’m overstepping boundaries or if I’m being too talkative.

“I don’t know a lot about you. Just about your dad.” He said.

“I’ll tell you more if you tell me about you.” I said and lightly pushed him with my shoulder, urging him to speak up.

“There’s really nothing more to say, it’s boring.” He said and acted as if he’s thinking of something more. “Well, I already told you about my dad and my brother, but I also have a sister.” I looked at him, kinda shocked he didn’t mention her the first time.

“Really? Where is she?”

“With dad. I still feel guilty for leaving her there, but she didn’t want to come with me here. She still has hope that he will be a good father again. He once was, when we were really little, when mom was still with us.” He looked at his side when he mentioned his mom, I guess she still hurts him even after all the years that passed. “Ah. Is she older than you?” I asked to try to shift away from the subject about his mother.

“She’s younger. I’m older than her by just a year.”

“Hey, I’m looking forward to meeting her someday. I’m sure she looks very pretty.” I said with a wide smile, trying to lighten up the mood. Instead, he smirked. Uhm, okay? Did I say something wrong?

“Why would you say that? Because you think I’m handsome?” He even lightly tickled me, teasing me.

“Ugh, gross! As if!” That was all my response, and faked a vomiting face.

We both laughed together so hard our backs fell back to the grass. I tilted my head to face him, and it turns out he was looking at me too. We were both silent for a while, just staring at each other’s faces. This situation should be very awkward, especially since I am an awkward person, but it didn’t feel like that at all.

I smiled at him, “Hey, tonight was fun.” He just smiled and nodded as a reply. “Hope this won’t be the last.” I looked down as I said that. I don’t want him to think that I like hanging out with him so badly, even though I do like it. I just don’t want him to think I’m desperate for his attention or whatever else he might think that isn’t true.

“Won’t be. I promise.” I was surprised when he held my hands and lifted me up on my feet. I held on to his jacket, wrapping my shoulders tighter, as the cold air brushed through us. “It’s getting late. And colder. Wanna get out of here?”

We were both walking out of the cemetery, heading home. None of us are talking, but again, it didn’t feel awkward. I like how even silence feels fun when I’m with him. And I also liked how I wasn’t the only one who had fun this night.

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