Chapter 3

SERENA’S POV

I didn’t even wait for a response before crushing his stupid divorce pen under my feet. A satisfying crack filling the air, and only after that, did I storm off!

His mistress scurrying away as I walked past her.

“Tramp!" I spat venomously, not caring if she heard me. I only had one mission at this point; go up to my room and be away from all of this!

“Serena” his voice called.

“Serena!” it grew louder, echoing in our quiet home. But I continued walking, not stopping for anything and most especially not him. “Stop right there, I’m still talking!”

Yeah! Like I give a shit.

The sound of my slipper heels storming away on the stairs only grew louder-a silent display of my brewing anger. It was the only response he deserved after been an idiotic selfish jerk!

“SERENA!”

And in no time, heavy steps sounded behind me. The intensity of each step adding to my anger as I waited for that moment. That exact that he would-

“I said stop right there! I’m-

“What!” I fired hotly, roughly yanking my arm away from his hold as we paused on the stairs. My eyes spiting fire, “What is it? Didn’t you hear me already? Or should I repeat?!”

His lips parted in slight surprise at my tone but even that quickly dissipated to be replaced by annoyance brewing in his eyes.

“Sign the papers,” he ordered slowly, his piercing grey eyes fixed on me like a hawk. I could feel that familiar domineering aura of his roll off him in waves, but I was too mad to let it affect me now.

“Serena,” he called again, his tone warning this time as I glared at him. Glared at the very face I had imagined over and over again in this very house. That I had constantly wished to see in broad daylight as I did now.

But never in my wildest dreams, never did I ever think for a second that it would be like this!

And the more I held his gaze, the more I felt my heart breaking to a million pieces. Cracking and shattering soundlessly as I tried to remain strong.

“I won’t repeat myself Serena.” His voice sounded again, no shred of emotion present in his eyes no matter how long I stared at them. They were just what they were- cold.

“Sign and let’s be done wit-”

“And if I don’t?” I dared, proud of myself that my voice did nothing to show just how much I was falling apart on the inside. “If I don’t sign, what will you do?”

The nerves he had to threaten me! He was the one in the wrong here and I should be the one to cower? For what?!

If anyone should have the upper hand here, then that should be me! I should be in charge here; I should make threats and scream to the clouds for all I care! How dare he try to threaten me?

The more I thought of it, the greater my fury.

“Stop trying to make a big deal out of this, it doesn’t look good on you.”

Excuse me?

“This doesn’t have to end badly for you, Serena. We can-

“End badly for me?” I questioned; my eyebrows furrowed to display my distaste. “Did you just say end badly for me, Eliot?”

He only but smirked arrogantly at my words, a striking familiar look crossing his eyes. Reminding me of just who I was speaking to. “We both know you’re in no position to go against me,” he said calmly, his tone condescending enough to let me know just what he thought of me.

“You can’t, even if you wanted to. So let’s not make a big deal out of this. I will ensure you get what you deserve. You won’t ever have to suffer for the rest of your life, Serena. Sign”

I just stared at him in disbelief, totally flabbergasted to hear him speak to me like that. No real words leaving my lips to fight back such downgrade, to scream and display just how hurtful those words were!

Was he really not sorry at all? Not even a tad bit remorseful?

Yeah, I know. I know very well that I was absolutely nothing compared to him.

I held no real power or backing to fight, even if I wanted to!

He was Eliot Beckett. The one and only son of the great Beckett family! A regal personality known not to be trifled with.

And me? I was just Serena.

Serena fucking Beckett! The most insignificant in all of this lavishness, both in my family and here in our home!

Probably why Eliot, a man I had considered to be mine. My husband and family for four whole years, could do this to me.

To bring me to such low… to say it hurts would be an understatement. My fucking heart felt like it was on fire!

But still, fact remained that I was his wife. His lawfully wedded wife and nothing could change that! Unless I said otherwise.

And so, I managed to smile through it all. My eyes blinking back heartbreaking tears. “You’re right,” I said slowly, gathering myself. “You’re so right, Eliot. I’m nothing, I have nothing too. But you know what?”

His eyes dimmed at my smiles, faint traces of confusion reflecting in his eyes before they quickly disappeared as usual. “What” he spoke quietly, but it only made me smile more as I leaned towards him for a bit,

“You need me.” I whispered, “As unimportant as I am, you need me. Or your acts will look bad. And because you need me, I refuse to give you what you want!”

His eyes hardened at my words, watching me lean back defiantly. And with one last glare at his mistress behind I said, “Go prepare to welcome your BASTARD, Eliot. Cheater!”

And with that, I turned on my heels. Storming right off!

Not once looking back. Holding my head high too, despite the burning pain in my chest and the sting in my eyes. Until finally, that familiar cream door came into view.

My feet growing heavier and heavier with each step. My sight blurring with unshed tears as I tried to keep it all together, to hold on and stay strong until I was behind the safety of those doors. My safe haven… the only place I could properly let it all out.

And by the time I got to it, slamming the door shut, I ran to that spot in my walk-in closet. And then it all came crashing down.

My heart, my world… everything! Every sob wrecking through me as I painfully bawled out my eyes. The events of today replaying over and over and over again in my head!

Like a broken record.

The hurt and heartaches consuming me whole, my first real heartbreak… and if it didn’t kill me tonight then nothing else could.

And after what felt like hours, I had no more tears left. Only the harsh realities that crying couldn’t help me and my life had become one whole bowl of ridiculousness, was left.

I thought about calling my mom, but quickly decided against that. Already knowing how that would end for me.

It was already bad enough that Eliot outrightly did this to me. To allow my family get wind of it would just be a death sentence!

One I was totally not in the mood for.

And so, I just stayed there. Relying on my cozy space to help heal my shattered heart. It was all I had right now any ways.

All my life, I had known only one thing; marry Eliot Beckett.

Marry into the Beckett’s family and continue the age long friendship with the Mackwell’s- my family. It’s all I’ve known, been taught and reminded of time and time again while growing up to womanhood.

It was my sole purpose- my father’s exact words.

He had done me a favor by keeping me. Raising and clothing an illegitimate child. And so, I ought to return his favor. And what other way than been useful in keeping his connection with the powerful Beckett family?

But looking back now, I’ve realized what a waste my life has been. “A waste truly,”

In a bid to please the man that birthed me, I sacrificed the one thing that actually belonged to me and me alone- the power of choice.

I loved Eliot.

I love Eliot, I have always loved him. Right from when we were introduced, knowing fully well he was to be my husband when I clocked 21.

And all these years that I had grown as a girl, a lady… he was all I thought about. My number one priority, and all I ever wanted.

I lacked nothing anyways, as long as I played my part-marrying Eliot, I lived well. I just wanted to be a good wife. To Eliot.

And I thought I was doing it. I really thought I was…

But now… now that he wanted to divorce me, what would become of my life?

“Haven’t I been living in vain?” I asked aloud. Forget how boastful I was out there, this was serious. Eliot wouldn’t take this lying down. What do I do then? How do I…how do I make this go away for heaven’s sake?!

For a second, I wanted to think this was all a dream. A real bad dream, but the shiny screen of my laptop, displaying my life documentary that I had always updated while imagining this wasn’t my life- said otherwise.

This was all real, and it was happening to me.

But the real question is; for how long would I continue to live like this? Documenting the actual happenings of my life like it wasn’t mine, letting other people’s choices determine my life… waiting for Eliot.

Today was an example. My life made no sense. Held no real direction at all, I didn’t even have a job!

My father forbade it. Wanting me to focus on Eliot, and thinking about it all now, I have never felt so foolish. So foolish that I went along with it.

My entire childhood, marriage and early twenties have all been stolen by him. And now Eliot, my husband was trying to determine the next phase of my life as well.

How many years would this decision of his take from me too; 8 years? 10? 20? 30?!

Why was everyone so obsessed with making decisions for me anyway?

Telling me what I should do and not do! Why?!

I was my own person, “I have a brain too! I can think for myself!” I voiced angrily, suddenly pissed off with everything around me. Pissed off at myself for hiding in my closet when the one to hide was out there in confidence!

“To hell with you Eliot! You and your stupid papers!” I cussed, angrily throwing off my comfy pillows at a section in the closet.

A frustrated cry building in my throat, “I’m done,” I croaked out, “I’m done obeying anyone! I’m just done!”

From now on I will do what suits me best. When I wanted, and how I liked it!

No one pushes me around anymore, no one tells me what to do!

“Starting with you, Eliot!” I spat with clenched teeth, the light of my laptop screen reflecting on my teary face. Reminding me the documentation I had initially been doing, and that was when it hit me.

“I can do what I want,” I said to myself, the idea taking root in my mind. “I can do… WHATEVER I want”

And so I did just that!

Eagerly wiping my dripping eyes and getting to work. The sound of my fingers typing away on my laptop filling the air as did the one thing I had always thought about but never dared to do. “And… posted!”

There.

Eat my dust, Eliot!