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Chapter 17

TYLER

When I close my eyes, I can hear Johnny saying, “It’s your fault, Ty. You always end things just before it gets serious.”

Can I blame him? He wasn't lying.

Today, as I sit in the backyard alone, my thoughts and feelings are muddled by my previous romantic relationships. As I sit here with a heavy heart, I try to make sense of my feelings but find myself slipping deeper into this state of despair and loneliness that I have been in for quite a while. Want to know what's funny? I like to think that every time I think I've found true love, it's ripped away from me, leaving me with a broken heart and a sense of emptiness that I just can't seem to shake off.

I love thinking about it all that way. It makes everything easier and uncomplicated. But in reality, that's not really true. I am the one who pushes them away. Yeah, it's me – I'm the problem.

Susan, Stacy, Laurel, Windinya, and most recently, Enid...all of them were amazing women, each with their own unique qualities that drew m
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