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CHAPTER 45: SANDRA
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TOXIC LOVE CHAPTER 46: JACK
My eyes traveled around the frat house a million times on Saturday night, yet I didn't see her at all. She was there, but she wasn't there. But she was here – in California.My Sandra was back in California.And it was taking every ounce of self-restraint I had not to run over to her dorm block like my ass was on fuckin' fire. Because, like Maggie said, I'd probably end up pinning her to a wall – and that was never good.My leg shook as I sat in English class, and my eyes were traveling the room again. I couldn't help it. She didn't show before she left. I wanted her to now. I needed to see her.The door opened, and Austin walked through. He crossed the room and sat next to me. “She's coming.”I nodded once and fixed my eyes on the door. If she was coming, then she'll be here-Now.She was here. Maggie's arm was linked through hers, but Sandra was smiling. It was a weak smile, and I hated myself for that. My hands tightened their grip on the edge of the desk, and I clenched my teeth t
TOXIC LOVE CHAPTER 47: SANDRA
Two days after speaking to Jack after English, and I still hadn't recovered. Where the crap has my 'bounce-back' mechanism gone? The freakin' springs were probably broken, actually. It had been used so many times, it was probably fed up of bouncing my ass when I fall on it.This time it was on me. This time, it was on me to pull myself together and get up from the low I seemed to have sunk to emotionally.I also needed to magically grow a pair of balls and actually go to the frat house for the books I left there because staring at it sadly from my bedroom window wasn't bringing them to me. Seeing Jack – in a classroom I can deal with, but in the frat house? His house? His room?Could I ever deal with that?If I went, would I come back even more broken than I am now?No, no, I'm not broken. I'm strong, just like he said. And I can go over there. I can do it.I slipped my pumps onto my feet and ran my fingers through my hair anxiously, shutting the door behind me. My feet seemed to echo
TOXIC LOVE CHAPTER 48: JACK
I grabbed a beer from the cooler in the kitchen and headed into the front room, taking a seat in the corner with Austin and Josh. Neither said anything. What can they say? We were all expecting Sandra to turn up tonight with the girls. Maggie and Leila will drag her along because Leila's fed up with the – and I quote – 'goddamn miserable look on her face all the damn time.'I guess we were both gonna be forced here tonight because I'd rather be anywhere but here.I took a mouthful of beer and swallowed it heavily, just waiting. I didn't know what I was waiting for.Maybe I was waiting for her pretty green eyes to meet mine. Maybe I was waiting to hear her laugh and see her smile again. Maybe I was waiting for a moment I can approach her – in a totally non-caveman way – and just.... See her. Without the shouting about how shit my life is without her. I can do without that, and she probably can too.The house filled up as the guys and I sat in silence. I didn't touch the beer again. I h
TOXIC LOVE CHAPTER 49: SANDRA
Inside, my body was in overdrive. My heart was pounding, my blood was rushing through my body, and adrenaline was filling every spot possible. I was so angry – yet I was so broken and I wanted him.Outside, I was frozen to the spot.“No,” I said, looking away from him.“Yes.” His voice was begging me to believe him, to believe he still wants me.That he loves me.“We both played the game,” he said softly. “Both of us, Sandra. We both had the same goal, and we both achieved it. Don't you get it yet? I fell in love with you, Angel. I'm still in fucking love with you. What did you think would happen? Did you think I'd just let you walk right on out of my life like you were nothing?”I nodded.“Shit, Sandra!” He let go of me and turned, rubbing his face. A tear dripped from my eye. “Did you really fucking think that? That I'd let you go from everything to nothing? 'Cause that's what you are. That's what you have been. Everything. You're fucking everything.”He stepped towards me and cuppe
TOXIC LOVE CHAPTER 50: JACK
In the two days since I dragged Sandra back to my room in a move that would put Fred Flintstone to shame, she had barely left my side. New York was too far – too fuckin’ far – and I’ll be damned if I was giving her the chance to escape again.Paranoid? Probably, but when you have it, you have it. And I had it.The door clicked open, and Sandra came flying in. She launched herself on the bed and sat in front of me, grinning at me like a madwoman. Her eyes were shining, her cheeks were flushed, and her hair was mussed. It made me think about us just having sex, and I grabbed her waist and lied back, settling her on top of me.“Guess what?” she said, excitement and happiness threaded in her tone.“What?”“I just spoke to Jane – oh, that’s Abby’s nurse – and she said that Abby asked to join in with a group activity yesterday!”I slid my arms around her waist, and she kissed me firmly.“That’s good, right?” I double checked. Hell, I had no idea.Sandra nodded, her hair bouncing with the mo
TOXIC LOVE WORTH KEEPING-CHAPTER 51: MAGGIE
TOXIC LOVE #2 - MAGGIE AND AUSTIN“You do realize your mom will ask her one hundred questions about you, right?” I glanced up at Jack from my stretched out position on his floor.“No shit,” he muttered. “That’s why you need to tell her what to say.”I paused my aimless flicking through my magazine. “Let’s think about that for a second.”“Maggy.”“No.”He shut his closet door and dropped to the floor in front of me. His dirty blonde hair flopped into his eyes and he leveled them on me, pleading with me silently. I shook my head.“Jack Cole, you chose to take Sandra home for the weekend. You have to deal with – and field – your mom’s endless questions.”“Magggy,” he drew my name out, sounding like a petulant toddler begging for candy.“It would happen sooner or later.” I shrugged and sat up, tucking my legs under me. “You might as well get it over with now. Besides,” I grinned, “I’m sure she’ll give the questions a break by telling her childhood stories.“Fucking hell,” Jack grumbled an
TOXIC LOVE CHAPTER 52: AUSTIN
Her blue eyes were focused on the words on the page in front of her like they always are. I had never known anyone to spend as much time with their nose between the pages of a book as Maggie did. Everywhere she went she had one – in her bag, in her lap, next to her.No one else noticed. And no one else noticed the fact I did.Her brow furrowed, and she sucked her bottom lip into her mouth as she swept her long blonde hair from her face. She gathered it at the back of her head and snapped a band from her wrist, tying it up and exposing the sleek curve of her neck and the skin there. I spinned my pen between my fingers and glanced at my own book.Off limits. That was what Maggie Hope was.I knew the first time I saw her I could never have her. The way she held herself and the sarcastic yet polite comments – she had endless amounts of “screams rich girl”, a class I never had and never will be in. It was engrained in her to treat everyone with respect no matter what you think of them. I w
TOXIC LOVE CHAPTER 53: MAGGIE
I wanted to be the girl going upstairs with him instead of the one watching him go.He drove me crazy in the worst kind of way. Every comment, every smirk, every cocky raise of his eyebrows. Each thing affected me, especially the way he clearly didn’t know me even though he thought he did. He was so wrong about me in every way, and it pissed me off so badly, yet I didn’t think I could say no if he walked up to me right now and invited me to his room.The one not fit for a little rich girl like me.The one I’d probably feel totally at home with.But I didn’t know if one night would be enough. When you want someone so badly you have to work to hide it, just one night of letting go of that restraint wouldn’t be enough. If he came up to me now and I let go, I don’t think I’d be able to hold on again. I don’t think I’d be able to leave it at one night of casual sex.Hell. I didn’t know if sex with him would be casual.I knew one night can’t hurt, but I also knew it can’t do any good.“Sex
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