LOGINPOSTED BY REMI’S PA
I genuinely don’t know why this month has been such a slow, frustrating roller coaster for me. I keep trying to put my best foot forward, get back into a proper schedule, and execute all the plans I had for September, but somehow something keeps happening and throwing everything off again. At this point, I’m exhausted, and more than anything, I feel awful because I know from the outside it can probably feel like there is always something. And honestly? I’m sitting here wondering the exact same thing. I hate feeling like I’m constantly disappointing you guys, especially because I had so many plans for this month and genuinely wanted to end September on a strong note. Unfortunately, just as I was about to pull out my laptop and start working, it fell, and the screen completely crashed. Of course my day apparently couldn’t get any better. 😭 Almost everything I need for work is on that laptop. My writing apps, my dashboards, my files, and most importantly, chapters that are already written and waiting to be uploaded. That includes chapters of Trading My Cheating Husband for the Lycan King. So the frustrating part is that I actually HAVE chapters. They are literally sitting there. I just cannot access them properly right now. The only reason this message is even reaching you is because I sent it to my PA, who still has my direct login details and is posting this on my behalf. It’s Saturday now, and I’m hoping to have the laptop taken in and the screen fixed on Monday. I’ve already gotten a quote from the person who handles my screen repairs, so at this point I’m just hoping everything goes smoothly and I can get back to work as quickly as possible. This has also created problems with another platform I write on, where I’m required to update daily to qualify for my monthly payment. If I cannot access my dashboard and upload, there is a possibility that all the work I have already put into qualifying this month could be affected. So believe me when I say I am currently trying very, very hard not to cry or completely fucking crash out. 😭 What makes this even crazier is that my laptop screen also broke around this exact same period last year. Apparently September and my laptop have personal beef. I just feel terrible. I know some people are probably thinking, “Aha, I knew she wouldn’t be able to maintain a regular schedule,” and honestly, you have every right to be frustrated. I understand. I would probably be frustrated too. I just want you to know that I am not disappearing, I have not stopped writing, and I am not sitting around ignoring the book. I genuinely have been trying. This month has simply been one thing after another, and I cannot explain how upsetting it is to watch plans I carefully made keep getting interrupted by things completely outside those plans. Please bear with me for the next couple of days while I try to get my laptop back into working condition. I am so, so sorry for disappointing you guys again. I’m just hoping October treats me significantly better than September has, because I genuinely cannot do another month like this. 😭❤️ — RemiPOSTED BY REMI’S PA I genuinely don’t know why this month has been such a slow, frustrating roller coaster for me. I keep trying to put my best foot forward, get back into a proper schedule, and execute all the plans I had for September, but somehow something keeps happening and throwing everything off again. At this point, I’m exhausted, and more than anything, I feel awful because I know from the outside it can probably feel like there is always something. And honestly? I’m sitting here wondering the exact same thing. I hate feeling like I’m constantly disappointing you guys, especially because I had so many plans for this month and genuinely wanted to end September on a strong note. Unfortunately, just as I was about to pull out my laptop and start working, it fell, and the screen completely crashed. Of course my day apparently couldn’t get any better. 😭 Almost everything I need for work is on that laptop. My writing apps, my dashboards, my files, and most importantly, chapt
EMBER’S POVI’ve got tears going now too. I open my mouth anyway.“Honestly, it’s only half done, the blood-lotus hasn’t even-”“Thank you.”“No, listen, you don’t have to-”“Thank you.” It comes out of her, torn and shaking, almost swallowed by a sob. “Thank you, Ember. Thank you. Thank you for whatever delusional hope kept you going. Thank you for fighting this hard for it. For me.” Her voice breaks completely. “Just… thank you.”And I’m half out of my seat to get to her, because I have never once been able to sit still while somebody cries like that, and she shakes her head at me hard and pushes me back down by the wrist.“No. Sit down. Let me do this.”“You’re going to set the coughing off-”“Then I’ll cough! I’ll cough, and I’ll do it anyway!” She’s laughing and crying at once, and it’s the most alive I’ve heard her in weeks. “Do you know what I did this morning? I watched the sun come up. From this chair, at this window. It came up over the trees and went all pink on the snow, a
EMBER’S POVShe laughs too, although hers fades into a breath as she reaches down to pull the blanket higher over her feet. The small movement costs her enough that my smile slips a little.She catches me looking.“Come and sit with me before you start worrying again.” Her expression softens. “I’ve missed you.”For her sake, I force my smile to brighten, putting on a brave front.“I missed you too. Unfortunately for you, that probably means I’m going to be worse.”I pull the chair closer.So I drag the stool over and sit, close enough that my knees bump the wheel of her chair, and for a moment neither of us says anything. Out the window, the grounds are white, and the gate is shut.“So,” I say. “How are we feeling this morning? And before you answer, if you say fabulous, I’m calling that doctor back up here to check you for brain damage.”“I was going to say luminous, actually.”“That’s worse.”“It’s accurate.” She tips her head back against the chair. “I’m grey, I’ve got the lungs of
I would also like to address something I have noticed recently because, if I am being completely transparent, I find it quite hurtful.For most authors writing serialized fiction on apps like this, updating one chapter a day is already a normal and consistent update schedule. I know that a few months ago, when I had more time, I was sometimes putting out three chapters a day, and on particularly good days, even four. But as life has gotten busier, I have had to figure out what is actually sustainable for me long-term, and right now, that is two chapters daily.So when I see comments along the lines of, “she just gave us two chapters,” or people criticizing the fact that I am “only” updating twice a day, I genuinely find it hurtful.What exactly am I supposed to be producing every day? The entire book?I think sometimes, because you are reading the chapters much faster than I can possibly write them, it becomes easy to forget that there is an actual person behind this story, sitting do
EMBER’S POVThe corridor goes very quiet.My next breath catches somewhere in my chest, and a cold stillness settles over me.“What I can tell you is that today she’s better than she’s been in weeks,” he goes on, gentler. “She’s not cured. Not by any mile, but she is breathing. She’s sitting up, she’s lucid, and she’s already argued with two nurses, which I am choosing to take as a good sign. Maybe this sustains her for a month. Maybe it doesn’t hold through tomorrow. I genuinely don’t know. So if you want my advice, go in there and enjoy the fact that she’s willing to complain about her overly sweetened coffee.”“Right.” I clear my throat. “Right. Okay.”He doesn’t leave. He’s looking at me with an odd expression, and then he says, “May I ask you something?”“Sure.”“How did you even find it?”“I didn’t find it on my own, I just-”“Lady Ember.” He gives me a look with real authority. “I’ve been practising for thirty-one years. I have never seen blacklung slowed. Not once. You walked i
EMBER’S POVI have walked the length of this bedroom forty times and I have counted every single one.Knox left before it was properly light. He didn’t wake me.I felt the bed go cold when he got up and heard him speaking quietly to Reyes in the corridor, but I kept my eyes closed and pretended I was still asleep.If I opened them, we would have to talk about what was happening today, and I wasn’t ready to do that yet.I wasn’t ready to face the depleting thing within me, the hopelessness and powerlessness of the situation.Today is the day they take Marjorie out of this house.Knox has barely stopped moving since he got out of bed.Every time I’ve passed the landing, I’ve heard his voice somewhere below, on the phone with lawyers, calling Nathaniel, calling people I don’t know, asking questions and then asking them again in a different way when he doesn’t like the answer.There is a kind of restless urgency to him I have never seen before.He is trying to get ahead of whatever comes







