Chapter Five

NATASHA

Shit.

She saw right through me. I must have made it obvious with all my whining about how i would always keep her safe. I should have held my tongue. What the hell was I thinking?!

"Alisa," I called, trying to reach for her, but the fear in her eyes slowly shifted into something much more. Something that struck my heart and dug deep.

Resentment.

My sister resented me. It was clear on her pretty innocent eyes. In the way she stood defiantly, her shoulders square as if to steel herself for whatever would happen next. I glanced at her husband to see a sad judgemental look on his face and felt my gut twist in pain.

"Alisa, please, I'll be fine."

"No you won't!" She screamed, stepping away from me. "Don't you know about Karma? Bad Karma Natasha. All yhose people youve killed, all the countless lives you've taken, they'll come back to haunt you, mark my words!"

"I wouldn't do this if I didn't have a choice-"

"Don't give me that bull," She hissed through her teeth, flashing them àt me. "You always had a choice! You could decide not to kill anymore. You could live a normal life!"

How can I ?! I wanted to yell right back at her. She was right. The people I killed haunted me. Sure I had tossed my identity in the mud, I had run away from the past, managed to escape from the monster I was.

Still.

Still it was hard. I could barely breathe. I couldn't sleep. It was why I'd gotten a job at the nightclub in the first place. Every time I closed my eyes, all I heard were the screams of terror of everyone if cut down. Everyone I had killed.

And I would gladly bear it all if it meant making her happy.

But Luca would kill her if I didn't agree to this job. My life meant nothing to me. He knew that. But he also knew how precious she was to me. And he was using that against me.

"I thought it was all over," She sobbed, tears running down her cheeks. "I thought I had my sister back! I see now, how wrong I was."

"Alisa," I called weakly but held my tongue. What more could I say? She already thought the worst of me. In her eyes, I was nothing more than a murderer.

All I had ever wanted, was to keep her safe. And as long as that happened, I would resign to the obvious truth that I couldn't make her happy.

I would choose her survival over her happiness anyday.

Blinking back the tears threatened to fall, I took a couple of steps back, nodding at myself.

"You can hate me all you want, Alisa. I do hope that one day you would come to understand just how much I am willing to do for you. You're my sister-"

"Not anymore," My sister said coldly, striking me right in the chest.

Couldn't she see?! I thought through the pain. Couldn't she see that I had tried?! I tried to be normal. I tried to lay low. I tried everything Alisa!

A normal life simply was not in the options for me. I was way beyond redemption. I couldn't be saved but she could be. And I would do everything I did to keep her safe all over again if I had to redo it all.

"Alisa," Her husband called, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. She buried her face into his chest and turned her back to me.

"You're not my sister anymore," She declared. "A monster such as you who takes pleasure in killing people, I do not wish to be associated with you! I have no sister!"

"You can't do this," I said weakly, tears stinging the corner of my eyes, ready to spill.

"I can and I will. Get out!" She screamed. "Go away. Go and do whatever nonsense you want! I don't care!"

"Alisa!" I snapped wanting to reach across, grab her shoulder and shake some sense into her. "You're all I have. I'm all you have-"

"You're wrong!" she refused, shaking her head in anger. "I have Mathew. I'm not alone. You can go be the crazy woman you want to be. From this day onward, I do not know you."

Every word seared on my heart threatening to burn it up in flames. Alisa pulled away from Mathew and pointed at the gates that had led me in. "Get out!"

"Will you calm the fuck down?!" I bellowed, trying to grasp on to whatever thread of hope there was. Why was she doing this? I never would have taken this job if I wasn't trying to protect her. I never would have!

"Mathew get her out or I swear I'll go crazy!" She screamed.

Mathew tossed me an apologetic look, untangled himself from his trembling wife and grabbed my arm. I allowed him to steer me away from Alisa.

"Don't listen to her," He mumured in my ears as he led me towards the gate. "She's just very upset. I'm sure she'll calm down soon and you two will make up again."

I nodded meekly, feeling slighted. I had expected that she would be mad. I hadn't expected her to toss me aside like a piece of rag she had been trying to manage all along.

Was that how she saw me?

"Don't be a stranger," Mathew Cooper said finally when I stepped outside their gates and gave me a brief nod, before shutting the black gates in my face.

'... you're not my sister!..." Her words echoed in my head. I shook it trying to get it out, trying to stop the voices in my head that agreed with her.

Monster.

She wasn't wrong. I was a monster. I was foolish to have thought I could live a normal life after it all.

I turned around, letting the tears run freely down my face as i made my way back home. Perhaps I should call off the deal. I had to find a way to make Luca see I couldn't do this. Especially if it meant Alisa would hate me.

But Luca would not listen. He had travelled all the way from Italy to New York to find me. I doubted he would let things go so simply if I refused him.

What if I rendered myself useless? Perhaps if I hacked off one of my legs? An assassin wss useless if he couldn't be mobile. A flash of Luca's angry face ran through my head and I shuddered. Yeah I was fucked. He would most likely still hurt Alisa and then kill me out of spite.

I couldn't do that.

My only choice was to do as he said. Protect Alisa at all cost. Even if it meant she would hate me. Even if it meant she would never see me again.

The journey back home was long and tiring. The sun beat down heavily, drenching me in my own sweat. My dress, the one I had worn with all excitement to see my sister, clung to my skin and irritated the shit out of me. I couldn't wait to be home so I could tear it off and stand under the shower for as long as I could, trying to forget every hurtful word Alisa had flung at me.

I managed to get home and had barely stepped a feet into my building when my phone shrilled. An unknown number flashed across the screen.

"Hello?" I said dryly.

"Well thats one way to answer the phone," Luca gruff voice reached my ears and I stiffened. I glanced around quickly, trying to figure out of he was around the area and was spying on me or some shit.

"What do you want?"

"Relax, bambina. You are way too tense. Things didn't go too well with your sister, I suppose?"

I was right, I thought gritting my teeth. "You are spying on me."

"Of course," He replied as if it was absolutely natural to do so.

"Really? Of course? Thats all you're going to say in your defense?"

The man chuckled on the other line, sounding way more amused than I would like to hear. "Lets get this straight Vera. I do not need to defend myself before you. I have no reason to do that. And out yourself in my shoes will you? You recruited a top Russian assassin who managed to hide from the Russian Mafia all these years, what would you when you found her? Let her slip through your fingers?"

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea," I grumbled and he laughed again.

"Oh trust me it is," He replied. "Change out of that dress will you?"

"Why?" I grumbled, walking into.my apartment and slammed the door behind me. "Don't like the color?"

"Oh it suits you just fine. But it is time, Vera Ivanov. And I doubt you can kill someone dressed like a princess."

"You'd be surprised," I gritted out.

"Si. I am certain I will be. My driver will get to you in thirty minutes. Get ready." And with that he ended the call.