LaraWhen Ander wakes up, he wonders why we’re in a hotel room and not at our apartment. I give him an excuse about how I lost the job and so as a result, we had to move. This saddens him and I can tell it right away. Instead of accepting what I told him, he asks me, “Is it because I was stealing?”His questions breaks my heart and I stroke his hair. “No, it isn’t. There were other reasons that contributed to it. But you can’t steal anymore, Ander, and you have to listen to me. I’m your mother. Everything I do and say is for your own good, even though you don’t want to do it. Do you understand?”He nods and lowers his head. “So, when do we go back?”“To our apartment?”He nods. “We can’t. I don’t work there anymore so we don’t qualify to stay at the apartment. We’ll find a new apartment where we can stay. It’ll be fun.”This doesn’t cheer him up and honestly, I have so much on my mind and on my to-do list for today that I don’t have time to sugarcoat things. Maybe when I pick him up
LaraThe nurse—Violet—begins the tale with a sigh. “I’ve heard it so many times that I know it by heart,” she reveals. Her eyes are distant and she seems very sad, so much that I can’t help but feel the same way. We’re seated near the edge of Lucy’s bed. She hasn’t looked up once. “May I ask how you found out that you were her daughter?” she asks me. “I mean, for years, there were no leads. I know this because Lucy’s mate never stopped looking.”I shrug. “The news came from the very man who plucked me from her arms. My father, the man who raised me.”Violet’s eyes widen. “Goddess. This is terrible!”“It is,” I agree. My eyes fill with tears and I lower them so she won’t see them but she already has. She reaches over and grabs my hand. She says, “I can tell this is very painful for you.”I nod. “It is.”“Well, maybe I can start by telling you who that woman was and why she ended up in this terrible place. I don’t know how much you know. But this woman has been in pain from the day s
Lara I feel numb after leaving the facility. Everything is a jumbled mess in my head. Figuring out what my next step will be is harder than it should be. I have to stay low and not attract attention to myself. I should drive back to the hotel and stay there until it’s time to pick up Ander from school. But this anger brewing inside of me won’t let me sit still. I call Finch. My hands are shaking as I reach for the phone. He answers again on the first ring. My breaths are uneven and I find it hard to figure out what to say even though I’m the one who called. “You saw her?” he asks gently. I slap my forehead with the heel of my hand. “What the hell was that, Finch?”“I had the same reaction when Dad told me,” he reveals. “I want to talk to him.”“To who? Dad?”“Where can I find him?” I ask. “Which prison?”Finch is silent on the other end of the line. Although I haven’t spoken to my father in years, this is something that I can’t run from. I need to know the truth from his side.
Lara I arrive at Ander’s school right on time. Other parents are parked in the massive lot waiting for their kids to run to the cars. I see many of them pouring out of the front doors. A few moments later, I zone out. My mind drifts off to everything that happened today and I just feel so discouraged. My energy has been drained and I can barely keep my eyes open. I just want to drift off to sleep and never wake up again. If I do, then I want all of this to have been a dream. Ambrose. I can’t stop thinking about him. Goddess, he’s seen me naked. I know it’s not the thing I should be focusing on but it’s true. He’s seen me dance. He’s the one who gave me this job as a stripper. And now, I’m his daughter. How will he react when he finds out?It’s just occurring to me now that he might not want me as a daughter or end up being disappointed in some way but that’s honestly the least of my worries. When I snap out of my troubled thoughts, I realize that a few minutes have passed and And
LaraI have a lot of hope upon arriving at the strip club. This is the only other place he could be in that would make sense before I have to accept that the worst has happened and he’s lost or has been snatched by a malicious soul. I get out of the car and race to the top of the metal staircase. I’m calling his name as I reach the top. When I get there, it’s empty. He isn’t here. I try the door and then allow all those feelings of despair to rise to the surface and swallow me whole. I sink to my knees in front of the door and cover my face with my hands. Tears stream down my face and my shoulders are shaking with every sob. I then put my hands together in front of me and pray. Ambrose comes up behind me after a few minutes. I’m not looking at his face but I can tell by the sigh that leaves his lips that he’s disappointed. It would’ve been great if he was here. That would’ve eliminated the need to go on a full-blown search for him. It would’ve assured me that he was safe.Now, t
DexterI couldn't believe that this was happening to me.Vanessa—no, Lara—glared at me. She then said, "How do I even know you're not the one who took him from me as punishment? How? What guarantees me that it wasn't you?"I'm staring at her and trying to figure out if it's really her. Fuck, I have no idea. In my mind, Lara Taylor was a blonde girl with a completely different face. It was Vanessa...Vanessa with her cat's eyes and sharp features.This has to be some kind of joke."Was it you!?" she demands. Her eyes are gleaming with tears. Her voice is shrill. "Did you take him? Would you hurt an innocent child for some sick revenge plan!?"I take another step back. I finally find my voice. "I don't even know what the fuck you're talking about, Red. I don't...you're Lara Taylor?"At my question, she pauses. She searches my eyes intently and then wipes under her eyes, not answering the question. The implications of this start to hit me one by one."This whole time..." I begin before th
LaraGoddess. My hands are shaking and I feel like I can’t hold the steering wheel properly. It feels like every bone in my body is frozen and I can’t function. I realize now, a little too late, that I should have never told Dexter about me. What had I been thinking?I guess this stress has made me feel like I’m not myself. Like I stepped out of my body for a moment and only returned now. He had no idea. The shock on his face and the way he behaved about everything was a confirmation of that. I fucked up. Big time. Now he knows who I am and he doesn’t even have Ander, so it wasn’t worth it. I’ve never been more disgusted with myself. The only thing that’s keeping me from crying is…I’m not even sure what it is. The determination to find my son, perhaps. I have to keep it together just enough to function, or I’ll lose it completely. My phone starts ringing. I look around it for a moment while keeping a hand on my steering wheel. I lower my eyes just for a moment and nearly drive in
LaraAfter hours of driving around and not finding him, I feel just about ready to give up. I’m so damn devastated. It’s impossible to know who’s telling the truth and who isn’t, and I’m just about done. I feel like my mind will cave into itself. It’s so much pressure. So much anguish. I hardly know what to do with it all. My sweet boy. Where is he?Tears prick my eyes but I have to keep going. I can’t stop. Nobody loves him more than I do so they’ll never put in more effort than me. I just have to not give up no matter how tired I am. I’ll never be able to rest unless I find him. My phone starts ringing unexpectedly and my heart drops. I park the car on the side of the road quickly and reach for it. It’s Ambrose. “Did you find him?” I ask right away. “How close are you to the strip club?” he asks me. He sounds very strange and I don’t know why. I can’t really read his emotions well. “Why?” I ask hurriedly. “I need to speak with you.”Desperately, I ask, “Is it about Ander?”“