Chapter 31

Katla

I sat on the floor, re-reading my father’s letter, trying to make sense of the words as an anger crept in along the edges of my confusion. How could he have kept this from me? How could he have left me to figure this out on my own? It was all just so unfair.

I didn’t ask for any of this. I didn’t ask to be Alpha. I didn’t ask to be married. I didn’t ask to be descended from the Moon Goddess whatever the fuck that meant. And I sure as hell didn’t ask for my father to leave me and my pack to become whatever it is now. I had never felt more alone. Silent tears spilled down my cheeks.

I felt a hand on my shoulder. “Katla…er, Miss Iceclaw? Is everything ok?”

I looked up through my wet lashes and saw Clarissa. She crouched down, and handed me a tissue. “Do you want to talk about it?”

I took the tissue and began wiping my eyes, not sure what I wanted. “Is it Mr. Silverburn? Did he hurt you?”

That question shook me back to the present. “Oh, no. He’s been nothing but wonderful. It’s just some stuff with my pack. My father, he…” I couldn’t finish all the thoughts that wanted to spill out and instead more tears seeped out.

Clarissa considered the situation for a moment and asked, “Have you been to the city before?” Changing the subject, smart. I shook my head no, and she suggested, “How about I take you out. I think you could use some fresh air.”

“That sounds really nice,” I replied and she stuck out her hand to pull me up. As I stood, she noticed the letter and bracelet in my hand.

“Is this what caused you to be upset?” she asked, pointing to the letter.

“Yes and no. It’s just been a really weird 24 hours” I said, not really sure what to say.

“That bracelet, it’s stunning. Is that cut from the same stone as your necklace?” She seemed a little too curious, and I quickly put the letter on top of my mother’s necklace before she noticed that too. I couldn’t handle a jewelry related question about that one.

“I’m not sure. It was a gift from my father before…I left,” I couldn’t bring myself to say what really happened. I put the bracelet on my wrist, and felt a tingle where it touched my skin.

“Let’s go get you some shoes. Have you had coffee this morning?”

I walked back up to the closet, and Clarissa waited behind in the room. There were more shoes than I had ever seen in my life other than at a shoe store. I chose a pair of light brown suede boots with a wooly lining. That seemed to fit the relaxed look I was going for, and I just needed to feel like I was being hugged.

We walked together to the elevator, and she swiped her card, then pushed L on the panel. There was a mechanical whir and a whoosh as the elevator dropped. I quickly grabbed Clarissa’s hand, then remembered the sensation of going up in this small room the night before. “You have been on an elevator before? Right?” she asked, sensing my unease.

“Of course! I was on one last night, obviously,” I smiled.

“Wolves in the South don’t use them?”

“Why would we need to? Our buildings, even the largest ones are much shorter. And, we don’t mind stairs—“

“Right, because wolves and running and whatnot,” she finished.

The elevator came to a stop and the doors slid open revealing a brightly lit lobby. Clarissa’s red-bottomed heels clicked across the sleek floor, and a doorman opened the glass doors bearing the S logo to the street out front. “Miss Beckman,” the door man greeted, and looked at me, waiting for Clarissa to introduce me.

“Good morning, Howard. This is Miss Iceclaw, Mr. Silverburn’s fiance.” Realization crossed across his face and he tipped his hat.

“Miss Iceclaw, welcome to Silver Tower. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to assist you.” His eyes were kind and grandfatherly. “I am absolutely delighted that Mr. Silverburn has finally decided to settle down. You’ll be good for him. I can tell.” He winked at me.

“Please, call me Katla,” I relied. “Miss Iceclaw sounds so formal.” I smiled back at him.

Walking out onto the street, I was in awe. I felt so tiny and insignificant next to the behemoth buildings and number of people coming from all directions. Nobody stopped to say hi or even acknowledged me, they were in their own thoughts, and very much so out of each other’s. “What is it like not having a wolf?” I asked Clarissa.

“You know it’s stranger to have one, right?” she asked back, “There are more of us than you, after all.” I actually didn’t know that, I had never thought about the wolf population in comparison to the human population. Everyone I knew was a wolf, and humans just seemed so fragile and inconsequential.

It just dawned on me that it might have been a rude question. “Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you, it just seems like it would be lonely without Aurelia, and I wonder if humans feel lonely with their own thoughts?”

“That’s a really interesting question. I don’t think of it as lonely, maybe more just quiet,” she considered. “Knowing the wolves I work with, sometimes I wonder if I might make better choices if I shared my mind with another—“

“Oh, Aurelia gets me into plenty of trouble,” I laughed. I heard her snarl playfully back.

“Can I ask you a personal question,” she asked.

“After last night, do you have to ask to ask me a personal question?” We both blushed.

“How did you and Mr. Silverburn meet? I mean, it’s not like the Southern packs have many dealings with humans, and I know Mr. Silverburn conducts most of his meetings with the Southern packs from Silver Tower.”

“My pack— my family— has an ancient alliance with Damien’s. I don’t really understand it, it’s like that part of our history is just… missing,” I continued. “Silverburn is one of our pack’s strategic alliances, and it’s not uncommon in wolf culture to solidify alliances through marriages,” I said matter of factly.

“But you love him? Or…is this an arranged marriage?”

“Damien and I believe we are each other’s fated mates, which is really just a nice coincidence. Fated mates are mates that are destined to find one another. On the next full moon, we will be wed and mark one another.”

“Mark one another?”

I let my fangs drop, and Clarissa stopped dead in her tracks and gasped, “I’ve never seen a wolf person’s fangs before!”

“Really? You’re around so many wolves!” Then, I remember what Damien said about the barrier dulling the magic, making it so shifting is possible but difficult. That didn’t feel difficult though.

Clarissa regained her composure and curiosity, “So you bite each other when you get married?”

“Only if you are mates. Damien and my father agreed that we would remain unmarked, only married for the alliance between our packs. But, Damien and I happen to be mates.”

“I see,” Clarissa said. “Does it hurt?”

“Being bitten by fangs?” I laughed, “You just saw them a little, what do you think? Actually, I have no idea, some say it does, some say it doesn’t. I think it just— depends?”

“So, Damien and your father decided that you would be married to him and you were ok with that?”

“I didn’t have a choice,” I said simply. “Everything I have done for my whole life has been for my pack. I was surprised when I found out, but it wasn’t completely unexpected especially since I was meant to be Alpha.” She looked shocked by this news.