realize

I gulped, looking at the man in front of me. He looked livid.

Looking every bit like he was ready to have my head. “we would leave you two to catch up, say hi to Lucas for me, tell him I am coming for his head next” my mum joked, not even noticing how the air around us thickened.

“do you want to explain this? Or Is this an aftermath of the spell you have been doing.” I felt the answer at the tip of mu tongue, I wanted to scream yes, to say that this was all just some misunderstanding on his part.

But I could not. My mouth suddenly became heavy, making it impossible to speak.

“Anya….” He was desperate, wanting answers I could not really give. “ANYA!!!” he boomed, causing me to shake.

“what the fuck are you doing here!!!” I asked in a bit of panic, breathing heavily from the panic but trying my best to conceal it

“that was not the answer to what I asked you!” he boomed, taking a little step my way, I took another step back, trying to keep the distance that was between us

“well I asked you a question too!!!” I tried over and over again to redo the spell to reign in my scent but I was too panicked at this point to do that.

He looked at me long and hard before he let out a sigh. “you left this” he said, stretching his hands towards me. In his hand was the necklace he had given to me when we were thirteen.

I snorted, looking away from it like it did not mean anything. “you should have thrown it away. It does  not seem worth it to come here for” I watched as something passed across his face, it was gone before I could even mention what emotions had passed through his face.

It was quiet, him not knowing what to say or being hung up on whatever it was that I had said.

I sighed, finding the silence uncomfortable “you can throw it on your way out. You wanted me out of your life, I am giving you want you want, consider this my letting go of you” I moved to the door but Ethan stood in front of me, blocking the doorway like he thought I might vanish again if he gave me even a sliver of space. The morning light streamed through the windows behind him, outlining him in gold, but his expression was anything but warm. His jaw was tight, his eyes sharp, too sharp, as if he was dissecting every twitch of my face.

“Why did you do it?” he asked. His voice was low, steady, but there was something wounded beneath it. “Why did you run from me the moment you found out we were mates?”

For a heartbeat, I forgot how to breathe. I wanted to deny it, to say that I had already explained that we were not mates but I couldn’t instead, I laughed.

It wasn’t a pretty, graceful laugh. It was a hollow one, the kind that came out when the alternative was screaming. I crossed my arms over my chest, leaning back against the wall as if that might steady the shaking inside me.

“Would it have made any difference?” I said, tilting my head mockingly. “Honestly, Ethan… if I had stayed? If I had stood there smiling and accepted it?”

My voice had that edge of bitter humor I used whenever the truth cut too deep. I could see the way his eyes narrowed, flickering with something like frustration, something like hurt—but that expression didn’t matter. Nothing about this was supposed to matter.

Then the amusement died on my face.

Just snuffed out.

A cold seriousness settled over me, heavy and suffocating, even as fear twisted violently in my stomach. I hated that he could see this—this fracture in me I couldn’t hide fast enough.

I looked him straight in the eyes.

“You know what we are now,” I said quietly. “So just get on with it.”

Ethan’s brow creased. “Get on with what?”

My throat tightened, but I forced the words out before I lost my courage.

“Reject me,” I whispered.

His whole body went still—so still it felt like the air froze with him. He stared at me like he hadn’t heard right, like the world had tilted sideways.

And maybe it had. Because saying it out loud felt like ripping out my own heart, flattening it between us, and pretending I couldn’t feel the pain.

My voice dropped, barely a breath. “Just do it, Ethan. You know you want to. I went on for years saying how we were mates or did you forget? How you snarled each time how you cussed at the thought of it?”

Fear clawed up my spine—ugly, choking, suffocating. I had spent so long convincing myself that this was the only way to protect us both, the only way to keep myself from falling apart.

It was better I brought it up than for him to bring it up or worse.

Him accepting me out of pity or something

But standing there, facing him, waiting for the blow…

I realized I wasn’t ready for it. Not really, the thought of him actually going through with the rejection made me want to crawl a hole and die.

Still, I held his gaze.

Still, I pretended I wasn’t trembling inside.

Still, I forced the final words out, even as my chest ached with every passing second of silence between us.

“Just reject me,” I said again, colder this time, harder. “And let’s get this over with.”