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10TH HEARTBEAT

XAVIER ROCKWELL

It wasn’t until I got far away that I started to feel exceedingly ashamed of what I just did. I just kissed Jordi Adkins and ran away like some coward who does not want to face any of the consequences of their own action. Talking to him was the whole intention and maybe kissing him too. Yes, I did get what I want when I kissed him but I felt like I never really got to have an open conversation about what happened. Though I managed to clear things up with him, that’s not enough for me. I know I wanted some more.

I got scared and maybe I would call myself a coward for that. I just recalled the first time that Hector landed his fist on me and my mom, it was also the same day that he called me a worthless faggot. And I thought the world has already cast that derogatory word into oblivion. Apparently, not.

I thought that day was only a one-time kind of thing, that he just got pissed about my mom, that he’s just tired from work, that he’s just acting up out of pure rage but
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goodnovel comment avatar
jyoungphil
poor baby Xavier
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