17. Cherish

Ivan left me a few hours ago. I thought the clarification my fiancee was an arranged match Ivan might, I don’t know, maybe show some interest in me?

If he is not interested then why do I catch his eyes on me so often and think of kind things for me, ordering books, clothes and giving me a glimpse of the outside world? What are all these sparks and swirling sensations if not desire?

I know I am attracted to him, I hopelessly gaze at his body whenever he walks past. All the extra training he has done, constantly eating steaks and huge servings of food too means his chest, abs and shoulders are all bigger and even firmer than when I first met him. Even his red hair, it makes every other man boring in comparison. The coppery tones and fiery colours compliment his glinting eyes rendering him constantly captivating.

Perhaps he is just getting into the zone and I am delusional. I did make him talk an awful lot about his past today. His mate. He already had his true love, a fact that sho