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099 Feeling It All

Penulis: Anney GW
last update Terakhir Diperbarui: 2025-07-08 17:52:08

(Serena)

We sit in silence for too long.

The kind that starts to turn thick and suffocating. The kind that fills up every corner of the room and pushes down on your chest until something finally breaks.

I’m the one who speaks first.

“I hate that I feel like you only get it when something terrible happens.”

James looks up. “I hate that you think I don’t care until I’m forced to.”

“Because that’s how it feels.”

He leans forward, elbows on knees. “Then say it all, Serena. Don’t hold back. Don’t try to be strong or composed or whatever it is you’re doing right now. Just fucking say it.”

I stare at him. “You want me to say it?”

“Yes.”

“Fine. You weren’t there. Again. And it’s not just about losing this baby. It’s losing the last baby. It’s everything, James. Every single time I’ve needed you, you’re somewhere else, chasing work, appeasing your mother, comforting Savannah.”

He recoils. “That’s not fair.”

“None of it is fair,” I snap. “Do you think I wanted to love her baby? That I meant to
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  • The Billionaire Married Me, Then Forgot How to Love Me   242 Dragging Up The Past

    (Serena)“Did Ms. Blake ever mention Mr Cross at that time?” Adler asks.“Yes. She said he was violent. That he smashed things, used drugs, and she was scared. She said she left him to protect herself and the baby.”My voice stays steady, but my insides are quivering.I can still see Savannah’s face when she said it. The tears that came too fast, too perfectly timed.She had a way of twisting pain into power. Back then, I thought maybe she was suffering. Now, I know she was strategic.“Did she file a police report against him?”“I don’t know.”“Did she ever tell you she’d informed Mr Cross she was pregnant?”“No. She never said those words to me.”I grip the edge of the witness box until my nails press crescents into the wood.Adler turns toward the bench. “Would it have been possible for my client not to know this child existed?”“I think it would’ve been almost impossible. Her pregnancy was everywhere in the media.”I hear a faint scoff from Damon’s table. He doesn’t even try to hid

  • The Billionaire Married Me, Then Forgot How to Love Me   241 Let the Court Games Begin

    (Serena)I stare straight at the judge, not at Damon Cross.He’s hard to ignore though.Rings, tattoos, smirk… every inch of him still built for shocking headlines. He looks like he came here for an encore, not a hearing about a baby he never met. His own child.The introduction to the proceedings have been done and I’m first on the witness stand.My body wants to implode and I feel so ill, I might puke right now.I can picture it. Judge asks me something and I puke all over the stand.God, that thought is not helping.I get sworn in and survive it. Damn this is so hard.The clerk calls my name. I raise my right hand, swear in, and sit. My pulse won’t slow.But no puking, so I ‘ll take that as a positive.Adler starts. “Ms. Langley, you knew Ms Savannah Blake during her late pregnancy?”“Yes.”“How did that begin?”“I met her outside Hale Tower. She stepped out in front of my car, I swerved, hit a lamppost. She yelled that I’d nearly killed her and said her husband worked inside. Then

  • The Billionaire Married Me, Then Forgot How to Love Me   240 Dreams and Detours

    (Serena)James is stretched on his side, propped up on an elbow, watching me as we chat.The sheets are tangled around my legs, and my body still hums from what we just did. It feels dangerously easy… being here, being this close again.My mind is turning over but it isn’t about being here with James.I smooth the linen with my palm, needing something to do. “There’s something I’ve been turning over in my head for weeks,” I say, voice soft but steady.His gaze sharpens. “Tell me.”I hesitate, tracing a line across the sheet. “It’s the bakeries.”His gaze sharpens, but he doesn’t interrupt.“They’ve been my whole life. I built them from nothing, poured everything into them. They were my stability when everything else was chaos. You know what they mean to me.”“I sure do. Are they doing okay? Did the expansion add pressure to the existing one?”“They are doing more than okay. So much so that the third one is being scheduled early.”“That’s great.”I nod. “But lately…” I take a slow brea

  • The Billionaire Married Me, Then Forgot How to Love Me   239 No More Rules

    (Serena)The last notes of James’s piano attempt fade into silence.For a while, neither of us moves. He sits there with his sleeves rolled, shoulders relaxed, watching me on the sofa.I try to act unaffected, but my mind and body are in turmoil, my hands restless in my lap.I know what this moment is.A line.If I get up, if I walk across to him, then I’m crossing it.If I don’t stop him coming to me, I’m crossing it.He leans back on the bench, tilts his head. “You’re quiet.”“I’m thinking.”“About what?”I hesitate. About how badly I want you. About how dangerous that is.But what comes out is only, “that I shouldn’t be here.”His expression shifts, softens. “Then why are you?”My voice wavers a little. “Because I wanted to be.”It feels like a confession.He stands, slow, deliberate. Each step he takes toward me pulls the air tighter.When he stops in front of me, I tilt my head back to look up at him. There’s no arrogance in his face, no calculation. Just James, raw, unguarded.J

  • The Billionaire Married Me, Then Forgot How to Love Me   238 One More Night

    (Serena)The maître d’ doesn’t ask our names.He knows. Everyone in this place knows. Still, he doesn’t say it out loud.That’s part of the currency here…discretion. The room is low-lit, conversations a muted hum, polished cutlery glinting under narrow beams.There’s a media ban in here. Even as far as blocking any signal.That’s why I said yes. I can sit here tonight and not be the woman who left James Hale, not the one his ex tried to destroy. Not be the wife who couldn’t survive the Hale circus.Tonight, I’m just Serena Langley.And across from me is the one man who can still unbalance my whole body with a look.His hand is light on my back as he pushes my chair in as I sit.The heat of it lingers as he sits down. No tie tonight.Collar open, cuffs undone. My stupid pulse reacts as if this is brand-new information instead of an old, familiar trap.I clear my throat. “Ground rules. We’re not doing the past. No court case. No Savannah.”His mouth twitches. “No Margot either.”“Deal.”

  • The Billionaire Married Me, Then Forgot How to Love Me   237 Walk Away Clean

    (Serena)Back home, my apartment feels too quiet after Haylee’s laughter.I stretch across the bed, phone in hand, staring at the last thread I have with James.My civic jumps into my head. That was really the nicest gesture anyone has done for me. It felt so genuine.I shouldn’t text him. Not tonight. Not when I just admitted what he does to me. But the need outweighs the caution right now.My thumbs move before I can stop them.S: Haylee told me you asked her to check on me. Thank you.The reply comes instantly, like he was holding his phone waiting for me.J: I’ll always make sure you’re okay. Even if you don’t want me to.I press a hand over my mouth, like that will stop the rush in my belly. It’s so James… infuriating, protective, unfiltered.And even now, I don’t hate it. I never did. Only when it wasn’t authentic. When he wasn’t being honest with me or himself.S: It’s ok. You’ve seen the worst and best of me.There’s a pause, then:J: I wish I could go back and fix things.S:

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