“Here goes the ten finalists in no particular order!”
My heart beat so fast when I was waiting to hear they called my name in The Best Romance 2025 announcement. One by one, they called the finalists’ names until the last name.
“The last finalist is … Sonia Cartwright! Let’s give all the finalists your biggest applause!”
All clapped to congratulate the finalists in the convention hall. However, I was shocked. They should call my name. Two weeks ago, I received a notification that my name with nine others were the finalists.
Later, they announced the winners. I didn’t care anymore. Sinking myself on the couch, I could only hug myself while staring blankly at the winners and their supporters who enjoyed the awarding night. Their cheerful voices filled the convention hall packed with many contestants who came to know the winners.
So many questions crossed my mind. Why didn’t they announce my name? Did they wrongly send the notification? How could it be? My eyes were hot, and the tears almost flowed to my face, but I didn’t want anyone to see me crying. So, I bit my lower lip and tried so hard not to think about anything.
All finalists would fly to London for a week. The winners’ books would be published by famous publishers. Whoever won tonight would be some new successful authors.
I also noticed some blitzes kept blazing from time to time. It seemed many reporters came tonight. A few crews with their videos shot the events. Apparently, they would show it on the television. The event committee already told contestants about it. I wasn’t sure if it was true.
After a while, it was finished. I rushed to the lobby because ten minutes ago I had already ordered a cab to the train station. My mind was blank. What I wanted was just to go home, to get away from this blasted place.
Before reaching the lobby, Tanya, a contestant who came and didn’t win either, saw me. “Lana, why do you rush home?”
“Oh, I don’t feel well. See you next time.” After waving to her, I hurried to leave. Fortunately, the cab that I ordered came not long afterward.
“Ms. Lana Smith?” the driver asked.
“Yes, I’m Lana Smith. To the train station, please,” I said while sitting on the seat.
Afterward, my mind flashed back to two weeks ago. The blasted email was the reason I suffered. I would be so embarrassed tomorrow. Cecil, my best friend who was also my close co-worker, read the email too through my shoulders. In fact, I promised to treat her something tomorrow. Also, I told my family too.
I covered my eyes with a hand. Despite my core family being a small family, my extended family was a big one, and we were close to each other. So, if one of us got wonderful news, all would know. It wasn’t great news anymore, but an unfortunate one. What should I do? It was too embarrassing.
My tears shed in my face. I wiped them with tissues, and a small package of tissues was gone instantly. The minutes to the train station were like hours. For the first time, I cried near a stranger, the cab driver who didn’t know my reason to cry.
When the cab finally arrived at the train station, I paid the driver while holding my handbag. The train station was like my freedom symbol because I could go away from here.
“Here’s the change,” he said while giving me a few coins.
I shook my head. “No need. Keep the change.”
“Thank you!” The driver smiled at me.
I rushed to go to the train station. It was still packed with the passengers. Later, passing the checking ticket gate, I hurried to find the train. Ah, I saw it! After blowing my breath, I rushed to the train.
After finding my seat, I leaned my head on the chair and pretended to sleep. I was too exhausted emotionally, even to have a small talk with a stranger. Not long afterward, someone filled the seat next to me. I opened my eyes for five seconds. It was a senior. He also slept not long after putting his head on the chair.
The train moved five or ten minutes later. The friction of train wheels and the rail became a lullaby for me. Finally, I was asleep.
Somehow, the train stopped abruptly until it woke me. I checked the watch on my wrist. It was eleven p.m. Since the curtains didn’t cover the window, I tried to see the situation outside, but it’s too dark. Some passengers were busy preparing their belongings. It seemed we were close to the destination, my city. So I prepared my handbag too.
After three hours, at 11.20 p.m., the train arrived at the station of city Y. I rushed to leave the train. Some porters offered to bring my belongings, but I only shook my head because I brought nothing other than my handbag. Many cab drivers were waiting in the parking lot and near the lobby. One of them offered to send me to the destination, so I entered the car.
I arrived at my parents’ house twenty minutes later. It was a huge house with white walls and brown windows. A giant tree shaded the house in the garden. I put a key to the lock in the gray fence. After being inside, I locked the fence again. It was quiet. Maybe my parents were already asleep. It was late at night, near midnight. I took a deep breath, too relieved. At least I could calm myself tonight.
Later, I unlocked the front door. Pushing the door, I suddenly saw the light turning on.
“Surprise! Happy birthday!” some people shouted.
I was wrong! My uncles, aunts, and cousins were here! Oh, my goodness!
“Congratulations! So, how was the result?” Aunt Cleo asked.
Reynold, my cousin, Aunt Cleo’s son, also said, “Wow, what a great timing! It’s your birthday, and you’re surely getting a wonderful present!”
“Finally! Congratulations, Lana! Your effort is not in vain!” Annie, my other cousin, congratulated me too.
“Don’t forget to send me your book too after it’s published. I want to show it off to my friends,” Viona, Reynold’s sister, also shook my hand and smiled at me.
My uncles and aunts patted my back and shoulders and shook hands with me. They were all so happy for me.
I cleared my throat. No words I could say despite having so many things stuck in my mind. In the end, a teardrop fell to my cheek, then another. Finally, my cheeks were wet.
All were quiet suddenly, but it wasn’t for a long time. After a while, they asked me.
“What’s wrong?”
“Lana, why are you crying?”
It had been two months since my first date with Edward. We were getting closer in and outside of the office. He even fetched me home from the office every day. The rumors that we were lovers spread in the office. The close relationship between the boss and the assistant was the easiest gossip to share. The positive side was none dared to insult or talk negatively with me. Probably they were afraid. If the rumor was right, I could tell Edward whatever I wanted. But then, the negative side was many staff started wearing their masks, especially The Trio Gossipers. They were so sweet with me while before they rarely greeted me. Fortunately, Cecil, Jenny, and Anna stayed the same and treated me like usual. This morning when I arrived at the office, Cecil pulled my hand to the cafeteria. “Come to the cafeteria!” she said.“Why? Do you want to treat me?” She widened her eyes. “Me? You should be the one who treats me. You owe me the story.”“Uh? Story? What story?” I pretended I didn’t
The trip home was faster. I didn’t realize we had already arrived at my parents’ house because I was so happy with the date tonight. “Come inside?” I asked, despite doubting he would go. I enjoyed the night with him until I wished we could prolong it. “Okay.” Again, he opened the door for me. “Your parents’ house is comfortable. I love visiting it. Your parents are wonderful too.”I widened my eyes. “Really? Are you sure you don’t make mistakes?” I joked. We were already in the living room. He chuckled. “Yes, your parents are great. As if I hadn’t met them for the first time.”I just smiled to hear that. My dad and mom could be so welcome and warm when they met with people they liked. I wondered if Edward became my husband, he would surely be their favorite son-in-law. He snapped his fingers before my face. “What are you thinking of?”“Oh? Uh? I enjoyed tonight. Thanks to you.”He nodded while smiling tenderly at me. “I also enjoyed tonight. Thank you, Lana.” His eyes beamed beau
I was silent, waiting for him to continue his story. Again, he let out a long sigh. “You know, after my professor commented on it, I couldn’t sleep that night. So many things whirled in my mind: disappointed, sad, and upset. I didn’t have any freedom, even to choose something I liked.”I couldn’t find the right words to comfort him. Some of my schoolmates experienced the same thing with him. When obligation and responsibility conflicted with the heart's desire, one had to make a sacrifice. In Edward’s case, he sacrificed his dream. After thinking about it, I asked carefully, “Did you regret you couldn’t do what you wanted to do the most?” I didn’t want to hurt him because this kind of question could be like pouring salt on an unhealed wound. For so many times, I could hear his sigh. I thought he wouldn’t reply because he was quiet for a while. Finally, he answered, “No, it wasn’t a complete regret. I did what I had to do. Besides, everyone is born with a different responsibility
“It’s fate. Life and death are in the Almighty’s hands. We can only live and do what we should do. You know if the day wasn’t the time for her to die, even if there was an accident, she would still be alive.”He didn’t answer at first, but then he sighed. “Yes, it’s possible.... but....”“Living in guilt won’t bring her back to life.”“I know, but it’s hard to let the guilt go.” His voice was hoarse. He cleared his throat several times. “I don’t know. Maybe because I have gotten used to carrying the guilt.”Suddenly, I got an idea. “Close your eyes.”“What for?”“Just do it!” I said.He slowly closed his eyes though he seemed curious about my request. “Now imagine Laura is here. What will you say to her?”He immediately hugged me. “Laura, I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I’m so stupid. If I could turn back time, I’d make it up to you. I’m so sorry! It’s just a stupid game. I didn’t mean to be serious with her,” he said. His tears fell to his cheeks. “Laura has already rested in peace ther
The next day, when I prepared myself for the date, my mom started the interrogation. “Where are you going, Lana? With whom? Do I know them?”“I’ll go with my new boss, Mom. He’s nice,” I said calmly. I had gotten used to her many questions. “A date?”“No. It’s just to build a good relationship so our work will be good.”My mom raised her thick eyebrows. “Oh, really? Then why do you keep searching for clothes if you aren’t dating?”“Well, I need something good to wear. Besides, it’s embarrassing if I go with my boss but I wear a bad one,” I said, giving her a make sense explanation while shrugging. “I see. But then, last year you had an office event. How come you weren’t as busy as now to find a new cloth to wear?” She seemed still curious. “Mom, I want to pee. Later, okay?” I rushed to the toilet. In the toilet, I let out a sigh of relief. If I didn’t escape, my mom would continue interrogating me until she found a satisfying answer. For six years without ever going to any date
I gaped instantly. A double raise? Was it a dream? “Boss, are you sure? When you mentioned double, do you mean I must do the work as your assistant and also as the accounting staff?” I asked him because I had to know for sure. It was a too-good-to-be-true offer. “Hold on. I’ve got things to do. Let’s discuss it later.” Then he hung up. I continued my work to find some folders and documents I needed to prepare the current month’s financial report. After a while, because I was too busy and focused on the work, I didn’t realize Edward already sat before me. “Answering your last question, I asked you to be my assistant full-time. Another staff can handle the accounting. So, you can focus. What do you think? Say yes, please?”Without further ado, I nodded. It was a dream come true! From last year I wished to get a raise. Now I got it, double! Who didn’t want it?***It was five p.m. already. The time flew so fast. I had finished piles of work. When I prepared to go home, Edward approac