5. I do's.

Oliver

“Breathe,” I whispered to the image in the mirror as I hunched over the sink. My stomach tightened into knots as the anxiety slowly rode to a new high. The orchestra blared loudly from the cathedral across, I still don’t know how he was able to fast track everything; the organization, the arrangements, the guests, the cake, everything.

At first, I thought it was impossible. Maybe I just wanted to give him a bit of a hard time when I told him that the wedding should be two days away. Maybe I wanted him to talk to me and assure me that there was nothing going on between him and Harvey, but now? It felt all too real, I was getting married to Benjamin.

My ears were filled with the loud thumps of my heart, threatening to burst out of my chest. The sun caught the red stones that were tethered to my immaculate suit, they were lined carefully by hand to wrap around the entire suit, from the left shoulder, diagonally till disappeared into the hem on my right side. It had immediately captured my eye when I went shopping for outfits the previous day.

“You can do this. You’re getting married to the man you love. You have fought so hard for this.” I wiped the excess water off my face and exited the bathroom. I snaked toward the window as a draft snaked into the room.

As I grabbed the base, something caught my eye, or someone. Benjamin, he was exiting the car and damn, I loved him in a suit. This one was tailored to fit his form, it was perfect. It hugged him in the right places and accentuated every single muscle that was enough to make me leak. The breeze tried to ruffle his hair but he had used enough gel to hold it in place.

What I wouldn’t give to run my fingers through that hair as he pins me to the wall and- Harvey? The thoughts flushed out of my mind as Harvey exited another car that parked in front of Benjamin. I thought I told this dipshit that he wasn’t invited?

He sashayed toward Benjamin. Even his steps oozed confidence, like he could make anyone bow to him. He had his arm open wide for Benjamin but received a firm handshake instead, a smile broke across my face.

“That’s right you French slut, not everyone wants you,” I whispered as I stared at the duo. He smiled before he moved closer. I couldn’t hear him from this distance but whatever he had said had made Benjamin’s shoulder tense. The colour drained from his face and he stared blankly as Harvey walked back to the car he had come from.

What was that about? The bell rang, it was time. I slammed the window shut and pocketed my phone as I descended the flight of stairs. When I pulled into the street, Harvey’s stupid car was gone and so was Benjamin. He must have gone indoors already not knowing I was across the street.

I swallowed a mouthful of air before exhaling softly just as the doors opened, a soft song strummed in the background: “Would you fall in love with me Again?” by Jorge Rivera and Anna Lea, it was perfect. Benjamin stood on the altar, I could barely see his face, but I knew he was perfect from this distance.

The entire congregation rose, I could barely make out the faces of the people who were there. I could pick out some from our company, but the other half were strangers and, in that moment, a flash of pain crossed my chest, I wish my mother were here, she would have loved Benjamin.

I swallowed the pain as I eased my way toward the altar. He was nervous, sweat had christened on his forehead, but it didn’t matter, my heart was running a rat’s race in my chest as I climbed the stairs.

His hands were cold to touch when I held them, his eyes were teary. I wanted nothing more than to kiss him there and then.

“Waiting…” Ana Lea struck her notes and goosebumps tore across my flesh. Nothing else mattered at this point, it was just me and Benjamin against the world, not stupid Harvey, no Veronica, no one.

“We are gathered here today to witness the holy matrimony between these two men. If there is anyone that thinks that they should not be joined together, speak now or forever hold your peace.”

It was a long second, but everywhere was quiet, nothing, not even a coo of the flock of doves I had seen outside.

“The rings?” the priest whispered. Benjamin stood still, unmoving, seemingly distant. He was still nervous, I ran my finger along the back of his hand, pulling him back.

“The rings, babe.”

“Oh.” He peeled the rings from his pocket and gave one to me. It had his name embossed on it, and his had my name, it was fucking sweet.

“Do you, Oliver, take Benjamin to be your lawfully wedded husband? To love and to hold, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?”

This was it, this was the fucking moment!

“I do!” I could have screamed at the top of my lungs.

“Do you, Benjamin, take Oliver to be your lawfully wedded husband? To see each other as equals, to be together in times of sickness, health, till death do you part?”

A beat of silence that stretched too long. I held Benjamin’s glassy eyes as a tear strolled across his face.

“I love you,” he mouthed, causing my eyes to tear up. I whispered back to him. He angled his body to the priest to respond.

“I don’t.”