The love-hate feelings that I have for silence rose again. I love how it can give me peace of mind whenever things are like tangled strings. But I also hate how it gives so much space in my mind to think of the things that I want to erase from my memories.
I slowly stretched out the packaging tape I bought days ago. The sound of it filled my room, making me remember what day it was today.
Another try. New feeling.
“I think that woman has gone crazy again.”
I looked up at the woman who spoke. She was in front of my house apartment's window that I was supposed to close when I heard her words. Next to her was another woman her age who was probably around their thirties or more.
“You were almost caught on fire,” he said while looking at the same landscapes in front of me.“I did not know it would go that far. Suffocation was what I wanted, not burning myself along with my house,” I answered.I unintentionally closed my eyes when the cold wind brushed against my skin. It was as if the invisible wind was making me feel its peace.I covered myself, even more, using the blanket that Waldo gave me earlier before we went here. He assisted me from going out of the private room that I was occupying to being with me on the hospital rooftop.I honestly don’t know what to feel anymore. I don’t know if I should be shocked to see him first the moment I opened my eyes.
“Where will you live now? ”I kept staring at the dancing trees outside the window of the room I occupied. I didn't pay attention to her and pretended I couldn't hear anything.I heard Katiya sigh when I didn't answer her question. I also have no answer to give anyway, especially now that my brain is not working.I would rather just watch the violent rustling of tree branches and the scattered raindrops on the glass. The weather was still okay when we were on the rooftop; the sky was peaceful. But now that the night is getting darker the wind and rain are getting stronger and stronger.According to the news, there’s a storm entering the country any time soon. And here I am, stuck in this room with
“Just drop me off at any hotel we’ll pass by,” I told Waldo who was driving the car.I didn’t bother myself to look at him. My eyes remained looking at the window where raindrops continuously flowed weakly. There’s still a thunderstorm threatening to destroy the peace of the people. But it is still not much felt in our vicinity. And unlike how vividly you could feel its warning last night, it offered silence the day after.If this is what they call the calm before the storm, then it should be scary. I haven't experienced being in the middle of a thunderstorm. But since I have watched the news I would not ask to experience more. It’s downright scary.I am not afraid of being harmed but I am afraid of others experiencing its wrath. Especiall
I opened my mouth to speak but ended up losing my voice caused by the shock Mizu’s words had brought me. Has the world usually been this small for Harris and I to meet this way? Has the world always been cruel for us to cross paths even though what I really wanted was to cut our ties completely? My mind suddenly got filled with confusion. My mind crumbled and became like a crumpled paper because of how this day turned out. The certainty I had felt earlier about staying in this place suddenly disappeared. I want to leave. To run away caused by the fear of getting myself hurt again the moment I saw Harris who robbed a big part of my being. "Is there a problem?" Waldo asked full of concern.  
“I’m confused,” Waldo said, finally breaking his long silence. I don't know if I should thank him for the silence he gave me during the whole duration when Mizu and I were talking. Or feel a sense of shame because once again he witnessed how low I am when it comes to the man I love. He may be silent the whole time but I know that he became more curious about me. "Curious about what?" I asked in a tone that would hide what I felt earlier.I just want to make it seem like nothing happened earlier.I led him into the elevator which he followed. I chose to stand with enough distance between us. I kept my eyes fixed on the metal elevator door. And since we were only in a small space, I could easily see his every move. "That Harris that you were talking about..." I felt a lump building on my throat upon hearing Harris’ name once again. i even needed to gulp just to free my airways. Damn his effect on me. "What about him?" I saw him wet his lips
I was soundlessly watching the quiet street in front of the La Majarica building. The surrounding has always been naturally quiet because it is located far from the highway and is indirectly hidden. The storm made the surroundings even quieter. Which somehow turned eerie.It's already past seven in the evening. And here I am filling my empty stomach with beer instead of a decent meal. Mizu is on my right, standing in the same position as mine. We both propped our elbows on the balcony railing of the room I was occupying. Like me, he was also holding a bottle of beer that he had brought for the two of us.True to his words, he really did visit me. I was actually not expecting his arrival anymore. I almost thought that he’d forgotten. And I was about to step outside to grab my own drinks. But even before I could do that, he was already standing at my door holding a bucket full of beer."You know what, Prescilla," Mizu carefully started.We've been here for a little while but both of us
We both fell into the trap of silence."But we both know the truth, Prescila. We know that you did not do what he was accusing you for," he replied, annoyed by my words. "Not your fault. You don't need to pay for the sins of others.""But that's the truth for him.""The reality is different for me, because I know who was at fault. I know who is to blame.” I felt his thumb running over the wounds I made on my own wrist. "I know it's hard and it can't be compared to anything. You got hurt by the loss of your child and the infidelity committed by your Harris. But do you think what you're doing weighs the same with the truth you believe in? Your life doesn't weigh the same with those lies. Don't waste your life. We both know that it's your fault. If there's to blame, then that would be your mom and my mom. It will never be your fault, Prescilla.”I kept nodding my head while trying to understand every word he said. If there's anyone who knows the truth besides me, it's Mizu. I only told h
"What are your plans today?" Katiya asked when I answered her call.It was three hours ago after Mizu pulled me into the room I was occupying. He forced me to stay here even though what I really wanted was to abuse the hours while Harris was in front of me. I can feel my cousin's tempering anger at the words I said.And despite his silence, I knew he had many things to say. He was not even given the chance earlier because of the call he received from the reception downstairs.The rain's getting heavier with each passing hour that made the people at the function hall stranded. And Mizu went there to attend to the guest while I stayed here in my room. Not that I intend to go there, but I'm too hurt right now to inflict more pain on myself even more.“I plan to do nothing but drown myself with alcohol for the rest of the night. How does that sound?” I asked in return.I began to massage my temple using my free hand because the effect of alcohol was finally kicking in. I'm already feelin