Chapter 7

DANTE'S POV 

“Let me go!” 

I thought I heard those words as my eyes fluttered open. My eyes did a quick scan of my room before my mind started working to remember what had led to this moment. The reason why Azalea was in my room, her head bent over an armchair, her mouth slightly opened so that she snored softly, drooling. 

There's nothing attractive about this woman, but she still looks beautiful and smart in her sleep. I would never admit that out loud because it'd sound so ridiculous coming from me. But she's…

“No, Mama! No!” She suddenly jerked upward, then started kicking and throwing punches to the air as she continued screaming. “Let me go! Please!”

It was her. It was her cries that had woken me up. I pushed myself up from my bed and pinned her down to the chair. I dodged a blow twice before my hands caught hers and pulled her to me. She fought for a while before she woke up, panting and pushing herself against me as if she were trying to escape from a monster.

If only she knew what I had done. If only she had any idea who I truly am, that I am worse than a monster, she'd be running away from me and go hide behind the monster for safety. 

“It's okay, you're safe now,” I whispered to her, wondering why I suddenly cared if she was safe or not. 

As if my voice reminded her of who she was leaning into, she pushed herself backwards in the chair and stood up. I sank back into my bed and watched her shuddering features.

“I…I shouldn't be here. Sorry. I'll ta–ke… I'm leaving!” She turned quickly to hurry out of the room. 

“Wait!” A word from me was all it took to make her freeze. “Stay,” I grumbled, surprising myself as well as her.

“It is already late in the night, I don't want you to disturb anyone with your clumsiness.” I cleared my throat and moved to the side of the bed to give her room. She's my wife, after all; sharing my bed wouldn't kill me, although it'd bruise my ego.

I didn't look to know if she was going to stay or leave, I was battling with my thoughts, pondering about a good reason why I told her to stay now when I almost scared her out when she was assisting me earlier. I feel better after sleeping soundly for the first time since I came out of a coma without being haunted by gruelling nightmares. But I woke up to see that I wasn't the only one who had trouble sleeping at night. 

When I heard light footsteps, I waited to hear the door open and close before I laid down properly in bed, so I was caught totally off guard when her weight took over the empty side of the bed. She lay so stiff and gripped the duvet when I glanced at her, I did wonder if she was breathing at all.

“Relax. I don't have fangs.” I broke into a wry smile. 

“I'm so–sorry.” She stammered, her voice hitching up as her exhales came out puffed and short.

“Take a deep breath.” I sat up and placed a hand on her forehead. She shivered, then obeyed. “Exhale. Close your eyes and think of happy moments, with friends, family, colleagues or a childhood memory.” I tried a trick that Preacher, my father's old guard, had used to help me when I was younger. He died many years ago before I hired Gerald as my driver-slash-assistant.

“I don't have such a memory.” She sprang up, pushing the duvet aside as she started inhaling and exhaling quickly. 

She tried to stand as she clutched her chest. It was obvious that it was difficult for her to breathe, and she was about to run away from me so that I wouldn't see another of her weaknesses. Seeing all of that in one night made me feel guilty for all the times I had been so harsh on her. How hurt she must've felt knowing that I was using her horrific experience against her. I had no idea she was going through all that pain, worse than I have been.

Panic attack? Claustrophobia? Whatever it was that gripped her after such long hours of restless sleep, I can't make her talk about any of that now. Hatred. Distrust. Anger. Those are feelings we have in common toward each other. She didn't have to say it; her fright and attempted flight had exposed it all. 

“Let me give you a good memory then.” I caught her arm before she could leave my bed and pulled her into my lap, then let her digest the notion as I stared into her eyes.

“What…” she inhaled, swallowing hard, “are you…” she exhaled sharply and her eyes widened in realization. 

I placed my lips on hers, then waited for her to give in and surrender before probing her lips until they parted for my tongue to glide in. Slowly, she began to respond and kiss back as if she had been hungry for it. The irritating sound her nose made while she tried to breathe properly, was gone. Soon, her arms went around my neck and she leaned closer until her soft breasts pressed against my rocky chest.

“Is that a good enough memory?” I whispered, breaking the kiss and pressing my forehead to hers just to resist the urge to go beyond kissing and explore the rest of her body. 

She sat still, but with a single sigh, her breath returned to normal and relaxed even more in my arms. She only looked shaken up by surprise at my attitude, and the only fear I could feel when she avoided meeting my gaze was the change that would come in the morning when my sanity would return.

I tucked her in bed and lay quietly beside her when she fell asleep in my arms. I woke up the next morning and left her still soundly sleeping. I quickly changed into my running shorts, polo and shoes after slipping out of bed, then sneaked out of the house so that nobody would see me leave except the two security guards on duty that morning.

That's why I was surprised when I noticed someone following me while I jogged across the street. It was still very early, but it wasn't dark, so I caught sight of a man in black clothes and red shoes, blue rubber gloves and a hooded jacket which hid his face as he ducked behind a store.

I didn't leave the house with anything, not even my phone, except for the pill box that Dani had prescribed for me. 

I picked up pace…