Because he’s hit a nerve and it hurts, and I hate him for it, hate him for stripping me bare. I don’t get a second of warning before he bridges the gap, instantly molding his mouth to mine, completely unexpected.
His lips are warm and soft and swiftly push mine apart. His tongue in my mouth, caressing, and it feels like heaven, instantly crushing my defenses and melting my armor. His hands get buried in my loose under layer of my hair and I kiss him back, tangling my fingers in the collar of his shirt so I can pull him closer, instinct taking over. Breathing heavily, getting lost in the sensation of his touch, that sensual mouth which does amazing things to my very soul. We both moan lightly as the kiss deepens, my stomach lurching with desire and I almost let go.My head reels around full circle as though trying to slap some sense into me and somehow, I mentally recoil.I can’t do this; I can’t. Yet I can’t stop, it’s addictive as“Where is this going?” I plead; I don’t want to do this, I don’t want to have this type of psycho babbling conversation with Jake. Especially when he’s being so weird, so pissy.How did we even get to this? Why is he so obsessed over this? Freaking Jekyll Jake and his neck breaking mood swings.“It hurt you.” His eyes come to rest on me, his face endearing and open. All anger gone, but it only makes me want to cry, so I look away, crossing my arms around my body protectively. His expression claws at my heart.“It’s the past and it should stay there.” There’s a strong sting in my eyes but he won’t make me cry again. My heart aching with everything he is trying to pull out of me.What’s wrong with him? Is this what he’s after? Tears, confessions?I move away and turn my back on him, it’s better when I can’t see him. Can’t see that look in his eye.“
The others are up on deck, lazing around and eating a cold buffet that has been set out on a long, low table by the loungers; it looks awesome and my stomach rumbles, despite the anxious tension between Jake and me. It’s a welcome distraction and I head straight for it to pile myself a plate, deliberately ignoring him behind me.“Oh, the love birds have returned.” Leila squeals and almost throws herself into my arms for a hug. I cast her a warning look, but she doesn’t seem to notice.“We went for a drive.” Jake’s broody tone comes from far behind me, as though he’s still standing at the top of the stairs to the deck, I ignore him. Leila casts a worried glance behind me, then back at me, but she keeps her mouth closed. I hear his footsteps as he leaves and heads down to the second floor and I’m relieved. We could do with some time apart to get over whatever this is between us; I can’t even begin to dissect the pas
When did this happen? When did my feelings spill beyond friendship this badly?I’ve seen him with other women …He’s always been this way, when did I start reacting like this? Breaking my heart over him being his Casanova self.“Tell the others, after I’m gone, I had to go away for a couple of days.” He’s picking up his suitcase, his body stiff with tension and the hatred oozing between us is unbearable.“What reason shall I give?” I sound alien. This fake politeness between us, thick in the stifling air. We’re both exceptionally good at cold and polite.“I don’t give a shit, Emma … The truth for all I care.” He flexes his eyebrows sardonically.That was a blow … it hurt; it knocked the wind out of my sails. I move back as he stalks out with suitcase in hand, he slides his shades on, despite it being duller in here and he doesn’t even look at me; he seems
What has Jake done to me? Why is he doing this to me now?My mind is a messy scramble of thoughts and emotions, half of which make no sense and I’m dying inside.I didn’t drink before Jake Carrero, I didn’t like how it made me feel. Like I lost control. I never kissed men ever, because all it did was bring back memories that make me feel ill. Never wanted anyone sexually, or even felt turned on by anyone before Jake.I never opened up and told anyone the things I’ve told him. I never kicked back and just let go, relaxed and had fun, before him. Never took my hair down, let alone cut it. I never cried, and now I can’t seem to stop.Jake has slowly unraveled me, and he has no clue. He has no idea the depth in which he has infected me, changed me. That damn Carrero and his effects on me can’t be reversed.I keep people at arm’s length, even Sarah … She’s my best friend, yet I’ve never told her anythin
He’s been gone more than two days, and I’ve tried his cell so many times. He’s monitoring his calls and I get voicemail almost immediately. I know he’s declining my number and it hurts more than I can bear. I don’t want to email or text, so I don’t, because my pride is bruised, and I won’t beg. I don’t know what to say, I only want to hear him and know he’s still there. I want to know what the hell is going on in that head of his, to know why he’s being this way, and what happens when we go back to work together.I’ve been swimming and reading to distract myself and eating with the others; I’m getting used to them and although Marissa and I give each other a wide berth, I’m starting to warm to the rest of them.Leila, as always, is a joy to be around, but I’m melancholy and would rather my own company. We went shopping on the mainland yesterday and I loved what having a girly friend felt li
My apartment is depressing after living on a luxury yacht for a week and I can smell Marcus in everything, even the air around the front entrance. It makes me cringe. There’s no one home and I’m grateful for that; it’s late, Sarah will be at work and Marcus, god knows where. I leave Sarah a note on the fridge, not to disturb me because I’m jet lagged and head to bed. I just want to lay down and get lost in a book or movie, anything to keep my head empty and unfocused.I need to wait until my boss decides to finally show face or contact me, to know what the hell is going on. I dwell over the fact he might fire me, for the hundredth time, and shrug.Maybe I’ll quit … With this job on my resumé I’m sure I’ll get another PA job quickly.Do I want that? I don’t know anymore. It might be for the best now things have gone south.* * *It’s after midnight when I’m woken by the buzz of my c
The office is a welcome sight, my assistant, Rosalie, greets me warmly and compliments my hair, tan, and natural highlights. She gushes a little too much at how I look, and I’m forced to coolly look her down, to get her to return to a professional manner.The issues with the merger are nothing and could have been handled by anyone involved, there is no need for me to be here at all. The lawyers have handled mostly everything, and the minor details are rectified in half a morning. I walk through to Jake’s office and dump the files on his desk, I like that they scatter messily, and I don’t bother straightening them. I quell the urge to push over his desk tidy beside them.“Fix them yourself,” I mutter and toss his pen on top. It’s fair to say I’m still as pissed as ever and right now; the thought of resignation is swirling in my mind rather childishly.No, if I’m going to do that, I’d rather say it to his face. I wou
I get bogged down with work and end up with the headache from hell, before heading home; it’s been a stressful first day back, and now, more than ever, I’m hating his absence. We’re a team … We work on all this crap together and we do it well. I’ve never had to single-handedly take over and I don’t like it anymore. I’m angry at him for making me do this. Angry at the way my emotions are up and down, and I can’t stick on hating him or missing him.I know it’s part of my job and I know I’m capable but still … I detest it. I know more about the Carrero empire than I could have ever imagined, I’ve so many staff at my fingertips it’s terrifying. I converse with lawyers, security, HR, and other crazily titled employees constantly, and sometimes I wonder how my head hasn’t self-imploded. I’m only twenty-six and to have so much resting on my shoulders at this age, is a huge achievement. I know I