Chapter 2

               Preparation

        Roslyn felt like a wondered young woman when she woke up the next morning. She felt exhausted and her eyes are burning due to lack of sleep. It was a Sunday morning and Roslyn has no reason to be in bed. She swiftly pulled herself out of her warm bed and head for the bathroom. Roslyn remembered David was still on the same roof as her suddenly a sick chill run through her body; she didn’t know if she could bear another sight of him today. 

       Roslyn and her sister Bella trudge into the familiar church building. Every time Roslyn comes to church, she remembers how enchanting the building was. She scrutinized the building, which perfectly reflects the unity between the painful drenched world and the unseen kingdom of God. The church is a testimony of a chivalric period. Where prayers are answered and where most people find redemption. It saddens her to know that David isn’t much of a believer; she thought of inviting him to church but decided on the latter and now she feels terrible for not trying to help the young man find peace and harmony with God. She remembers her childhood days with Dave. Dave and Roslyn used to seat side by side during Sunday school teaching and it was such a memorable thing. Shaking the thought out of her head, she followed closely behind her younger sister. The two girls sat on the third pew where they can easily see the preacher. “Why didn’t ya bring David to church?” Belle asked. Roslyn tilted her head and glance at her sister. “Why should I do that?” “He’ll be ya husband soon. It will be good if you two get more acquainted with each other”, Belle said suggestively. Roslyn thought of what Bella just said and she thinks her Bella is right. After all, she didn’t have a choice; she must learn to accommodate him. “Perhaps next time I’ll invite him”. Bella nodded her head and turned her gaze to the front.

      The church service ended in no time, and Roslyn was full of the joys of spring. She was euphoric and elated to be among the people, opportune to hear the word of God today. “Isn’t it a wonderful sermon?” She asked her sister. Bella nodded her head in response, clutching her bible to her chest. “It is a wonderful sermon indeed, but ya have to invite David next time. He needs to hear the word of God too”, “I’ll try”. Said Roslyn, but she knows it will take her more than a week to convince David to come to church with her. The two walked down the road that led to their mansion. The sun was below the horizon, and they no longer feel the hotness of the sun, they passed through the lush green fields, the dense groves of trees and the sound of chirping sparrows provides them with angelic music. Time like this, Roslyn wishes their mansion was far from the church so she’ll have more time to listen to the birds sing. “Do ya think I’ll make a good wife?” Roslyn asked that has been disturbing her for the past two days. “I bet you’ll be a good wife and an exceptional mother. You have a heart of gold and ya make most girls in church eat their heart out. Never doubt yourself dear”. Bella said good-naturedly. “I think you’re saying this because I’m your sister”. “It’s not true; anybody that knows ya will tell ya the same thing I just told ya now”, Roslyn thought for a while. “Anybody but not David”, Roslyn ruminate, “why do you say so?” Bella bargain, “he said it”. “Well, too bad ya will be his wife in three weeks’ time”. Roslyn sigh, she is clearly getting frustrated already. 

     They walked into the mansion; there was a tense, silent inside the mansion and the wondered if they’re the only ones inside the mansion. “Mother and pa might still be in church”. Said Bella, sensing the confusion on Roslyn's face, “perhaps they are; I’ll go check if David is still around”. Roslyn shuffle her way to the stairs, her feet hurried on the stairs. She softly knocks on the door; she heard David muffle voice from the other side. He fleet the door open and a frown passed over his face, like he wasn’t delighted to see her. Roslyn's gaze fell on his bare chest; she swallowed the lump in her throat, suddenly feeling dehydrated. “Like what ya see?” he teases. Roslyn roll her eyes heavenward, her lips tense into a firm line, and she was flushed. “Ya did not come to church”, she voiced out ignoring his sassy comment. “Do I have to remind ya that I have no interest in going to church”, Roslyn shakes her head, and she doesn’t know what to say again. She knows it was a waste of time trying to talk him into going to church, but she tends to keep trying.

******

     A week has passed; Roslyn became more restless with each passing day. She isn’t looking forward to this wedding; her wish is for God to do his wonders and change her parents’ mind. 

“Can we go now?” Bella asked the moment she stepped into the living room with her small purse clutched to her chest. “Yes, which of the bridal shopping mall are we going to?” Asked Roslyn, Bella put the tip of her hand on her chin thoughtfully, “I know exact shop we can get a unique collection”. Said Bella, “We’d better go now before the sun rises”, Roslyn stood up to her feet and the two maneuver out of the mansion. A few minutes later, Roslyn and Bella inconspicuously entered the fine exterior building and stumped through the first shop aisle. They stopped at the cashier table but Roslyn's gaze lingered on the fine wedding dresses hanging up, she was marveled to see such beautiful wedding dresses. And she wishes all marriages will be as beautiful as these dresses, it’s so unfortunate that most marriages in this modern period end up in divorce. And fear creeps into her mind. She was painfully aware that David didn’t love her, and she didn’t love him either. Roslyn fears that she’ll end up as a divorce when David finally tires of being with her. She tried to dismiss her churning thoughts as the cashier welcomed them warmly. “They have a customer-friendly return policy”, Roslyn thought to herself. 

      Roslyn and Bella followed the sales girl closely behind as she guided them to the dressing room. Roslyn clutched the wedding gown to her chest, trying her possible best to avoid staining the dress. “Are ya sure this one will be ok? I don’t like something revealing”, Roslyn complaints as they continue to walk down the narrow hallway. “C’mon Roslyn, ya will love it I promise just try it first”. Said Bella persuasively, the young lady came to a halt at the front of a white wooden door and motion for Roslyn and Bella to enter, Roslyn thanked the lady and slightly opened the door to reveal an empty white room with a large mirror hanging on the wall, the small window was covered with a white translucent curtains. Roslyn meticulously stripped to her weary skin. She carefully slips the semi-heavy dress on her body, and Bella's eyes brightened upon seeing Roslyn's slim figure inside the new wedding dress. “Ya look so breath-taking”, She commented. Roslyn slowly turned her gaze to the mirror and scrutinized the dress on her body. The strapless, white of semi embroidered and expensive fabric emphasizes her slim waist, it hugged her 36inches hips, and flare out a bit from the knee down to her feet. The neck has a V neck shape and another V-slit opening on the side reaching to her knee. A small smile passed her face. She liked the dress, and she was grateful to Bella for choosing this dress. “It sure look beautiful, thank ya for helping me”, Bella nodded her head in response, with a smile still plastered on her face. “David will love ya when he sees ya in it”; “I doubt he’ll even look my way”. Responded Roslyn, “is not like I want him to love me”, she murmured. 

      The trip back home was a tedious one for Roslyn and Bella; they were both exhausted when they got back to the mansion. Roslyn thanked Bella again for making out time for her. She made her way to the stairs, but the sound of her name echoed in her ears. Pretending not to hear, she took another step but her mother called again; she passed her right hand over her forehead in frustration before heading back to the living room. She worried that her mother will not let her have alone timed to reflect and pray for her wedding in a few weeks’ time. Mrs. Williams dropped the fashion magazine on the small coffee table and pulled her reading glasses. She looked at Roslyn. “Seat”, her instruction buzz in Roslyn ears, Roslyn silently sat down on the sofa opposite to her mother, she look perturbed all she want right now is a warm bath and a bed rest but she knows she’s not getting any of that soon. “Aren’t ya happy to get married to one of the rich man in town?” Roslyn passed on with a frown. She didn’t understand why getting married to a rich man was such a big deal to her parents, it’s not like her parents don’t have money. “Happiness is far from me mother; I wish to marry the man I love”, she said. “And who is that man?” her mother bargain, “I—I haven’t seen him yet”, she murmured, Mrs. Williams sigh; she was torn at her daughter’s constant rejection to marry the man they want for her. She was painfully aware of the fact that their daughter was not happy, but her hands are tight. She can’t do anything. Mrs. Williams secretly begged her husband to reconsider his decision and put his daughter’s happiness into consideration, but he refused to adhere to her plea. All she can do now is to persuade her daughter to marry the young man. “You’ll never see him again”, said Mrs. Williams. Roslyn tilted her head and glance at her mother. She looks confused. “See who?” she look askance at her mother, “Dave, I know your feelings for him”. Roslyn was surprised. She doesn’t know what to say. They two settled in an awkward silent. “I’ll suggest ya let your heart love another”, Mrs. Williams’ advice. “I’ll t—try,” she muttered, slowing the lump in her throat. After all, there was nothing she can do in three weeks’ time she would tie the knot with David, she would have to bury her past and focus on her new home. She has to learn to tolerate David, be the virtuous woman the scripture talked about. Roslyn clumsily made her way to her room, her legs tremble and her heart clouded with pains. It hurt her she would have to forget Dave if she really want her marriage with David to work out. She has always dreamt of having a typical happy Christian family, where she doesn't have to force her husband to come to church service with her and she thought Dave was the perfect man for that kind of a family but now she has to settle for the complete opposite of what she wanted. That was why proverbs 16:9 says, a man’s heart deviseth his way: but the Lord direct his steps. Roslyn realized that all this while she was making her plans and decisions without involving God first, she didn’t remember that God is the one who knows what’s best for her. Small tears encompassed her eyes; she was marveled at her new discovery. “God forgive me for not coming to you from the beginning. Dear God I summit all my plans and aspirations into your delicate hands today”. Roslyn said a silent prayer. 

         Roslyn felt like a newborn baby after soaking herself in a warm bath. She smiled at her reflection in the mirror. She loves the new feeling inside her, she was no longer disturbed of her marriage plan with David in fact she was happy to settle down with him because she know she has a mission in David’s life and his family, with light heart she stepped out of the bathroom and head for her bed, bending to her knee, she pulled out the small box under her bed and sat down on the soft bed. “Is time I let go of my past”, she breathes to herself. The aroma of the night breeze passed her pointed nose and she shivered at the cold air penetrating through her night wear. Roslyn hurried to the window and closed it, she on the small lantern resting on the nightstand. The dimmed light brought a hush of anticipation. Roslyn picked the box again and dropped it carefully on her thigh, she lifted the cover, and her eyes scanned the box. She reached out her hand to collect the pictures but restrained herself, deciding on the later she left the room with the box clutched to her chest. Her foot hurried down the stairs, afraid not to get caught. She matched out of the house through the back door. Roslyn stood in the garden near to the building; she dropped the small box and realized that she forgot to bring lighter with her. With a bored sigh, she trudged back into the mansion and returned a few minutes later with the lighter. 

      Roslyn watched as the fire turned the box into ashes. She swallowed the lump in her throat, “my days are past, and my purposes are broken off, even the thoughts of my hearts”, she code the scripture. She eventually returned to the mansion and head straight to her room. Roslyn tucked herself to self, but her mind still lingered on the old box, which has turned into ashes. She inhaled deeply and scrambled through her whirling thoughts. Roslyn could still picture Dave’s plain face. His big brown eyes and full cheeks, she remembered the day Dave and his parents left for the state, it was such a mournful day, and she was drenched in tears so also Dave, she watched with her own wet eyes as Dave cried and struggled to get loose from his father’s tight arms. Roslyn felt a jumble of emotions. She cursed herself for allowing herself to feel this way. Just a few minutes ago, she told herself to let go of her past and make peace with her present, but here she is wallowing in her past. She voluntarily closed her eyes to fall asleep but her eyes burst open when she had a rattle sound down stairs, Roslyn tried to ignore the sound and go back to sleep but she heard the successive sound again. Roslyn fleet out of bed, she fear that an arm robber had found his way into their home, she panic for a while excogitating on what to do. She took her small stool next to her bed and tardily walked out of her room, trying her best not to make any unnecessary sound. Roslyn stood on the last stair, she squint her eyes, scrutinizing the entire living room. Everything seems normal, she saw nothing out of ordinary, in-order to be sure she shuffle her way into the kitchen where she found Bella mopping the floor. “You’re still awake?” Asked Bella, she reached for the kitchen chair and sat down. “Yes, is hard to sleep when one is nervous”, Roslyn said. She stretched out her arm over the table and collects the remaining bottle water, “I can imagine; it’ll come and pass in no time”. Roslyn nodded her head in agreement. She glances at her sister. Bella bends her head low, like she was in a deep thought, Roslyn ache her brow. It had been quite a long time since she last saw her sister like this. She suddenly felt bad for not being that caring sister she used to be. For the past few weeks, all she thinks of is her-self. She thought of her happiness and forgot to care for her own sister like she should. “Anything bothers ya?” Bella raised her head and stare at Roslyn. She opened her lips to speak but closed it back. Roslyn found it rather strange her jovial sister looks perplexed and tone. “You can tell me what the problem is, deah,” said Roslyn. She stood up from her chair and reached for the empty one beside Bella, placing her hand on Bella’s shoulder. “Franklyn released me of our relationship”, she told Roslyn, the sob she has been trying to repress has escaped her parted lips, and Roslyn wrapped her arms round Bella’s shoulder in a soothing manner. Bella found comfort in the arm of her sister. “Oh deah, I’m so sorry; when did that happen?” Bella sniffle and nuzzle herself in Roslyn’s arm. “A—a day before yesterday”, she shuttered. “I feel awfully bad for your broken relationship, why didn’t ya tell me?” “Ya have your own problem Roslyn; I wouldn’t want to bother ya with my boring issue”. Roslyn shook her head rapidly in protestation, “is not true, family comes first. Ya should have told me”. Said Roslyn, it saddened her that her sister is passing through this; “did he tell ya why he ended it?” Bella nodded her head. “He said he h—has another”. Roslyn could feel her blood boiling and her body shivers cause of anger, it hurt her to see her sister swimming in pain. “Such a cruel world”, she thought to herself.