Chapter Twenty Six

 What I Ran From

Erwin (Mila)

The door slammed behind me the moment I stepped into the house.

“Erwin?” Marge’s voice came from the hearth. “You’re back already? Did something happen?”

I did not answer.

My boots hit the floor harder than needed as I moved past her. My chest felt tight, like I had been holding my breath for too long.

“Won’t you eat?” she asked again, worried now. “I kept food warm.”

“No,” I said, my voice flat. “I’m not hungry.”

She stood in my way. “At least look at me.”

I turned my face aside and walked past her. I did not trust myself to speak again. If I did, everything inside me would spill out.

I shut my door and leaned against it. My hands shook as I reached for the latch and slid it closed.

Only then did I breathe.

The room was dark and quiet. My bed sat untouched. The small table near the wall held my folded clothes from the morning. Everything looked the same, but I felt different. Wrong.

I pulled my shirt over my head and let it fall to the floor. Then my trousers. Then everything else.

I stood there bare, my true body exposed, the one no one ever saw. The one I hid every day just to survive.

My eyes dropped to my arm.

The mark glowed faintly blue against my skin.

Tears rolled down my face before I could stop them.

“Why?” I whispered. “Why now?”

My fingers trembled as I touched the mark. It burned under my skin, deep and sharp, then dulled again, as if it was listening.

“This can’t be happening,” I said softly. “Not now. Not like this.”

I slid down onto the edge of the bed and covered my face with my hands. My shoulders shook as quiet sobs escaped me.

I had left him.

I had run.

And now I could not stop thinking about it.

Before I found Lucien in that room, something inside me had already been wrong. My wolf had been restless all day. Twisting. Pulling. Pushing against my chest like it wanted out.

I had tried to ignore it.

But then the pain came. Stronger. Sharper. It dragged me through the halls without thought, without choice.

I remembered standing outside the door. Hearing voices. Feeling sick.

And then I saw him.

Lucien.

On top of her.

My heart had cracked at that moment.

I clenched my fists. “I shouldn’t have gone in,” I whispered.

But another thought stabbed me even deeper.

If I hadn’t gone in… would he have slept with her?

The idea burned worse than the mark.

My wolf had not been angry just because of the bond. She had been angry at him.

That scared me.

I had seen the way he looked at me before. The confusion. The pull. The pain he never spoke of.

And still, there he was.

With Irene.

“I don’t belong in his world,” I told myself. “I never did.”

I wiped my face with the back of my hand and stood up. My legs felt weak, but staying in that room felt worse.

I reached for the cloak hanging behind the door and wrapped it around myself. The fabric settled against my skin, hiding me again.

I opened the window and let the night air rush in. It was cool and clean. I closed my eyes and breathed.

For the first time since leaving him, I felt like myself again. Not Erwin. Not the boy everyone saw.

Just me.

I slipped quietly out of the room and into the back of the house. The floor creaked under my feet, and I froze, listening.

No one followed.

I stepped outside and let the night swallow me. The moon hung high, pale and calm, nothing like the storm inside my chest.

I pulled the cloak tighter and moved toward the trees, needing space. Needing air. Needing to think.

Then a voice stopped me.

“Erwin?”

I froze.

Selena.

I did not turn around.

She stepped closer. “I thought that was you,” she said softly. “Where are you going so late?”

My throat tightened.

“Erwin?” Selena called again, closer now. “Why are you dressed like that?”

I stayed still, my back to her. The cloak felt heavy on my shoulders, like it knew I was trying to escape.

“I asked you something,” she said gently. “Why are you sneaking out?”

I turned halfway, keeping my face low. “I needed air.”

“At this hour?” she pressed. “And with a cloak pulled over your head?”

“It’s cold,” I said.

She did not believe me. I could hear it in her silence.

She stepped closer. “Did something happen at the castle?”

“No.”

“You’re lying,” she said softly. “You always do when you’re hurt.”

I clenched my jaw. “You shouldn’t worry about it.”

Selena frowned. “Then where are you going?”

I searched for the first excuse that came to mind. “I wanted to cut some wood. Earlier I couldn’t.”

Her eyes widened. “At night? Are you mad? You’re injured. Marge will scold you.”

“I don’t care what Marge thinks,” I snapped.

Selena blinked, surprised by my tone. “Erwin—”

“I said I don’t care.”

She took a step back. “Then don’t go alone. I’ll come with you.”

“No,” I said quickly.

“Why not?”

“I need space.”

Her brows pulled together. “From me?”

“Yes.”

The word came out harsher than I meant, but I did not take it back.

Selena’s voice softened. “You don’t have to shut me out.”

“I do,” I said. “Right now, I do.”

She hesitated. “Then tell me where you’re really going.”

I swallowed. “For a run.”

“At night?” she repeated. “You hate running in the dark.”

“Not tonight.”

“I can join you,” she offered. “It might help.”

I turned fully to face her then. “I said I want to be alone.”

The words echoed between us.

Selena stared at me, hurt clear on her face. “You don’t get to push people away forever, Erwin.”

“I’m not asking forever,” I said. “Just tonight.”

She sighed. “You’re shaking.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“You promise you’ll come back?”

I nodded once. “I promise.”

She did not look convinced, but she stepped aside. “Don’t stay out too long.”

I did not answer. I pulled the cloak tighter and walked past her, my steps quick and sharp.

The moment I cleared the house, I ran.

Not a slow jog. Not careful steps.

I ran hard.

My feet hit the ground fast, my lungs burning as I pushed forward. Branches scratched my arms. Leaves tore at my cloak. I did not slow down.

I needed distance. I needed silence. I needed to outrun the pain inside my chest.

The farther I went, the louder my heartbeat grew. The mark on my arm burned, spreading heat through my body.

My vision blurred.

Blue filled my sight.

I stumbled, then dropped to my knees. A sound tore from my throat, half growl, half cry. My bones felt like they were shifting, pressing, demanding release.

“This is wrong,” I whispered, my voice breaking. “Stop.”

It did not stop.

The pain surged, sharp and deep, rolling through me. My hands dug into the dirt. My body shook as something inside me forced its way out.

I screamed.

The sound did not come out human.

Fur spread across my skin. My senses sharpened until the world felt too loud, too clear. Smells hit me hard. The earth. The trees. The night air.

I rose on four legs.

The pain faded, leaving behind a strange calm.

I was whole.

I ran again, faster than before, my body light and strong. The ground disappeared beneath me as I moved through the forest with ease.

The world made sense like this.

I did not stop until the trees thinned and the land opened up.

I reached the edge of the mountain.

The drop was steep. The wind rushed up to meet me. I stood there, chest rising and falling, my heart steady now.

And the  mark no longer burned.

For the first time that night, I felt quiet inside.

Then I felt it.

I was not alone.

My ears twitched. I turned my head slowly, scanning the darkness behind me.

But I saw nothing.

I growled low, warning the night.

A step sounded behind me and I turned only to see a  wolf stepping out from the shadows.

It was bigger  than me. Dark-furred. With its  sharp eyes and fixed on mine.