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061

Author: Aya Starr
last update Last Updated: 2025-09-10 02:09:03

COLEEN

I woke up the next morning with that strange, buzzing feeling still in my chest, like my heart hadn’t quite decided if it wanted to settle or keep racing.

The night before, Hayden and I sitting close, talking like the world outside the apartment didn’t exist, kept replaying in my mind like a film reel. His voice, low and steady, the way his eyes softened when he promised me he wasn’t going anywhere… it lingered, heavy and light all at once.

I should have felt calm after that. Secure. But instead, all I felt was this terrifying, vulnerable ache in my stomach. Because things were shifting. And for someone like me, who’d built walls so high they nearly touched the clouds, change was always scary.

By the time evening rolled around, Mark was sprawled out on the couch, his guitar case leaning against the coffee table, a half-empty bag of chips tucked between his arm and his ribs. His curls were a mess, he’d clearly spent the day bouncing between rehearsals and rushing across campus.
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  • The Hockey Star Regret    074

    COLEENI woke up warm. Warmer than usual.For a disorienting second, I didn’t recognize the low ceiling above me, or the hockey posters on the wall, or the faint hum of the mini fridge from the kitchen corner. Then it clicked, memory flooding back in a rush. Hayden’s apartment. Hayden’s arms still heavy around my waist, his steady breathing brushing against the back of my neck.My cheeks heated instantly.Carefully, I shifted, trying not to wake him. But the moment I moved even an inch, his arm tightened, pulling me closer.“Don’t even think about it,” his voice came out low and gravelly, still thick with sleep.I twisted just enough to look at him. His hair was a mess, his eyes half-lidded, but the smirk tugging at his lips was fully awake.“You’re supposed to be asleep,” I whispered.“And miss this?” He nuzzled into my shoulder, his scruff scratching lightly against my skin. “Not a chance.”I laughed softly, pushing at his chest. “I have to get home.”He groaned dramatically, finall

  • The Hockey Star Regret    073

    COLEENThe bus ride back to campus dragged, every mile stretching longer than it should have. By the time I stepped off with my duffel bag slung over my shoulder, the sky was already washed in winter gray, and my phone buzzed with a message from Alicia reminding me about Hayden’s game.I hadn’t realized how much I’d missed him until that moment, the ache of distance settling into something sharper. I texted back quickly, promising I’d meet her at the rink.The arena was already packed when I arrived, students crowding the stands, banners waving. Alicia waved me over to a spot she’d saved near the front.“You look like you haven’t slept in three days,” she teased as I slid in beside her.“Thanks,” I muttered, though I couldn’t keep the smile off my face.When the team skated onto the ice, my eyes went straight to him. Hayden. Even under all that gear, I knew the way he carried himself, confident, steady, eyes sharp with focus.The game was fast, brutal, the kind of match that made the

  • The Hockey Star Regret    072

    HAYDENThe weekend seemed way longer without Coleen. It wasn’t like we were glued to each other’s sides every second on campus, but I’d gotten used to knowing she was there. Maybe I’d see her crossing the quad, hair whipping in the wind as she hurried to class. Maybe I’d catch her in the athletic complex, teasing me with that little smirk she wore when she thought she had the upper hand. Even if we didn’t talk, just the chance of bumping into her was enough to keep the day from feeling empty.Now she was miles away, at her dad’s house, and the silence felt heavier than it should.Jason was gone, he’d gone home for the weekend. Logan was off somewhere with his cousins. I was left to my own devices, sprawled on the couch with hockey highlights running on the TV. I didn’t even see the plays. The commentators’ voices blurred into background noise. My mind was stuck on her.My phone buzzed on the coffee table, jolting me out of my daze. I grabbed it instantly.Coleen: Made it safely. Dad

  • The Hockey Star Regret    071

    COLEENThe bus ride home was long, quiet, and gave me too much time to think. I’d ignored Hayden’s insistence that he drive me, he’d practically begged, his brow furrowed in that worried way of his, but I needed the space. Just for a little while. Besides, the last thing I wanted was to drag him into another heavy conversation with my dad.Also, I figured it was way too early in our relationship for me to introduce him to my father. Knowing how Dad was, I was so sure he was going to give Hayden a really good grilling and I wasn't ready for it.So I sat by the window, headphones in but no music playing, watching the blur of streetlights until the bus rattled into the small terminal near my old neighborhood. From there, I called an Uber, clutching my bag a little tighter when the driver’s car pulled up. By the time I got to my dad’s house, my nerves were wound tight enough to snap.The porch light was already on, casting a soft glow over the chipped railing. Dad must have been watching

  • The Hockey Star Regret    070

    HaydenThe coffee shop was crowded, the low hum of conversation mixing with the hiss of the espresso machine. Jason and I had claimed a corner table near the window, the kind of spot that gave you just enough space to stretch your legs without brushing against the next table over.Jason leaned back in his chair, a steaming mug in his hand. “Man, I swear, these people put more caffeine in a cup than should be legal.”I smirked, stirring the foam on top of my latte. “That’s because you order the strongest thing on the menu every time.”“Hey, if you’re gonna drink coffee, you gotta do it right. I'm not going to do any of that latte shit. That's just a whole ton of milk disguised as coffee,” he said, then tilted his head, studying me with that easygoing grin of his. “So. Things have gotten pretty serious between you and Coleen, huh?”I froze with the spoon halfway to my mouth. “What about me and Coleen?”Jason laughed, low and amused. “Don’t play dumb. Half the campus saw you two at the t

  • The Hockey Star Regret    069

    ColeenIt was no secret that I was averse to social gatherings. I didn't like the fact that I was going to be around a bunch of people that I didn't know and would most likely be expected to make conversation with them in some instances.However, I didn't have a choice tonight. There was no excuse for me not to show up. That woul have made me the worst friend in the universe and I liked to think I was better than that.The auditorium wasn’t anything grand, just the small multipurpose hall on campus that student events always seemed to get crammed into. Still, fairy lights strung along the walls gave it a cozy glow, and the buzz of chatter filled the air as students trickled in.Beside me, Hayden’s hand brushed mine, casual but deliberate. “You sure Mark’s performing tonight? Or is this one of his fake excuses to get you out of the apartment?”I shot him a look, though I couldn’t help smiling. “Don't do that. Of course he’s performing. He’s been practicing that new piece all week, reme

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