The Landlord vs. the Crazy Sister-in-Law

I'd just come home from collecting rent when I heard my sister-in-law, Bernice Drummond, talking trash about me behind my back.

"Val, look at Randall. He never goes to work. He's got no ambition at all! What's the point of staying with him? Honestly, I know a boss who's easy on the eyes and, more importantly, actually has potential…"

Bernice left home to work in Galanor and pulled overtime almost every night. I guessed it bothered her, watching me hang around the apartment all day.

She was eating the crab I'd paid for and using the smartphone I gave her, yet she was still talking crap about me to my wife, Valerie Drummond. How was I supposed to stay calm?

I tossed my keys down and was ready to march over there and let her have it. But as soon as I stepped inside, Valerie spotted me and rushed over to stop me.

Bernice's husband came from a pretty average family. Valerie didn't want to make her feel bad or mess up their sisterly bond, so she never told her what my family was really like.

After stopping me, Valerie turned to her and said, "You shouldn't say things like that. That's out of line."

That soft little rebuke didn't calm me down at all, but Valerie had always doted on Bernice, so I let it go.

But Bernice only doubled down. "Why can't I say it? Am I wrong? He sits around all day playing games. Call it freelance if you want, but let's be real, he's unemployed. He's already given up on life at his age.

"Val, what are you gonna do? Bust your ass to support him forever?"

My temper flared all over again, and I marched over and yanked the phone right out of her hand. "You live off me and still stand here talking crap about me? Do you take me for an idiot?"

Bernice fired right back. "It's just a phone. Fine, take it back! That stupid phone is nothing compared to how you're wasting Val's best years. Tell me, where am I even wrong here?

"All you ever do is shuffle around in those slides or lie at home playing games!"

Her words pissed me off so much that I actually laughed.

I wore slides because I was always running out to collect rent, and the gaming was freelance work that actually paid. But somehow she twisted all that into me being some deadbeat.

Bernice knew exactly what she was doing. She jumped right in. "Val, he's useless and holding you back. You should dump him before it's too late!"

She was trying to take Valerie from me right in front of my face. I'd never seen anyone that shameless. Bernice hit a new record.

I looked over at Valerie, too, waiting to see how she'd handle it.

All she managed was a weak little protest. "You shouldn't say that about him. He's your brother-in-law."