Chapter 4

"What do you mean?" I asked.

Ryder's tone softened. "Isabelle has always wished she could be photographed in a bonding-ceremony gown. I want her to take your place in the shoot. Think of it as granting her that dream."

I looked at him in disbelief. My mate wanted another she-wolf in my gown, in our photos, and in my place.

"Won't that put a strain on her pregnancy?" I asked.

Ryder watched me with expectation in his eyes. "The photographer will be careful. Besides, it'll brighten her mood. I'll make it up to you later with a shoot that's better than this one."

Later? There was no later for me.

I nodded again. "Alright. I'll send the gown over."

Ryder went still again. He'd expected a fight, tears, or for me to make a scene. That was how I used to beg him to change his mind. Instead, I just let it stand.

…

The next morning, Ryder rushed through breakfast and made for the door.

While adjusting his tie, he said, "After the photo shoot, I'm taking Isabelle to Holy Moon Spring for purification and blessing to keep the pregnancy safe. I'll be gone for about three days.

"So you'll handle the ceremony arrangements. Just keep it simple.”

He'd told me not to worry about it. But now he dismissed the day we'd spent five years waiting for with nothing more than a throwaway "keep it simple".

I knew the bonding ceremony would never happen. Still, hearing him say it cut deep.

Ryder picked up his keys. "Once it's all over, I'll give you the prime territory as compensation. You've always loved the forest by Silvercrest, haven't you?"

Compensation? He was grinding my dignity into the dirt and dressing it up as generosity.

I only nodded. "Alright."

Ryder shot me a look, unsettled by how calm I was, but said nothing more. He made for the door.

"Wait for me to come back."

He threw the words over his shoulder and left.

As the door clicked shut, I slumped onto the couch.

Wait for him? For what? So we could go through a meaningless bonding ceremony while he watched me die by inches?

I stood and went upstairs to the bedroom. I opened the closet. There it was, the white gown I'd picked with such care. Every stitch of the hand embroidery held the hopes I'd had for that ceremony.

I took it down and eased it into a garment bag. Then I began clearing the room of everything that was mine.

Five years of memories filled three suitcases—photos, letters, little trinkets—each one a witness to what we'd once had. But to Ryder, they meant nothing apparently.

I packed it all and set the suitcases beside the bed. The room lay empty, no different from me.

…

In the afternoon, Isabelle called. Her voice was sweet with delight. "Thanks for the gown, Lyra. It's gorgeous. I felt like a true Luna when I put it on."

"You're welcome," I said.

She wouldn't stop bragging. "Ryder wouldn't stop telling me how beautiful I looked during the shoot. He said seeing me in the gown reminded him of everything beautiful."

I shut my eyes, unwilling to hear more. "Isabelle, is there anything else?"

Her tone turned serious. "Oh, one more thing. Ryder's taking me to Holy Moon Spring for purification and blessing to keep the pregnancy safe. It's the most sacred place in the Bluemoon pack, and only a true Luna may enter."

The true Luna? I was Ryder's mate, and I'd never been taken there.

"Enjoy yourselves," I said, and hung up.

The sun set. The house was empty except for me.

I sat in the living room, staring at a framed photo on the wall. In it, Ryder has his arms around me. His eyes were soft with love. That was three years ago.

When did the way he looked at me change? When did he start giving all that gentleness to someone else?

I got up and stepped onto the balcony.

The distant mountains lay ink-dark. The sky bled red. The world was beautiful. It was such a shame I didn't have much time left to take it in.

I heard footsteps behind me. It was the housekeeper, Susan Hale, drawing near.

"Luna, would you like me to prepare dinner?" she asked. Her voice was full of concern.

I turned to the older woman who had cared for me for the past five years. "No, it's fine. You don't have to look after me starting tomorrow."

Susan was taken aback. "What do you mean, Luna?"

I patted her hand. "Nothing in particular. I might be leaving for a while."

The look she gave me said she understood more than I'd said. Her lips parted, then closed.

It was late. I sat alone in the bedroom, staring at the packed suitcases.

Ryder would take Isabelle to Holy Moon Spring for a blessing. And I would begin the last leg of my life.

My phone buzzed with a text.

"We just saw such beautiful moonlight at Holy Moon Spring. I wish I could bring you here often."

That message wasn't meant for me. Ryder had sent it to the wrong person.

I deleted it, as though I was erasing us altogether.