Chapter 23: Alpha's plea

SERA

I felt him before I saw him.

The mate bond, broken, damaged, but still there, pulled tight in my chest. A sharp ache that made me gasp and press my hand against my ribs.

"Sera?" Elena looked up from the herbs she was sorting. "What's wrong?"

"He's here," I whispered. "Thorne, he's at the border."

I didn't know how I knew, the bond shouldn't work like this anymore, not after the rejection but somehow, I felt his presence.

Elena set down her work. "Do you want me to come with you?"

I shook my head, "I need to do this alone."

"Kade won't like that."

"Kade doesn't get to decide," The words came out sharper than intended. "Sorry, I just..I need to face Thorne myself."

Elena squeezed my shoulder, "you're stronger than you think child, remember that."

I walked through the compound toward the main gates. Rogues stopped to watch me pass, their expressions curious and concerned.

Marcus met me at the gates, his face stern. "He's been waiting, Kade wants to send him away."

"Where is Kade?"

"On the wall watching," Marcus pointed upward.

I looked up to see Kade sitting on the compound wall, his posture rigid, his eyes fixed on something beyond the gates. Even from here, I could feel the tension radiating from him.

"Open the gates," I said. "I'll talk to him."

"Sera…"

"Open them, Marcus."

He hesitated, then nodded. "I'll be right here if you need me."

The gates swung open, and I walked through.

Thorne stood about thirty feet away, alone. No guards, no weapons, just him.

I stopped breathing.

He looked terrible, thinner than I remembered, his face haggard, his clothes loose on his body like he'd lost significant weight but it was his eyes that shocked me..desperate, haunted, filled with pain.

This wasn't the confident Alpha, this was a broken man.

"Sera," he said, his voice rough.

The sound of my name on his lips sent a confusing rush of emotions through me. Anger, pain and underneath it all, a traitorous flutter of the old bond trying to reconnect.

I crushed it down.

"Thorne," I kept my voice cool. "What are you doing here?"

"I needed to see you." He took a step forward and I saw him wince like the movement hurt. "To talk to you, to.."

"To what?" I interrupted. "Apologize? Explain? Tell me why you chose politics over your mate?"

He flinched like I'd struck him. "All of that and more."

"I don't want to hear it."

"Please," The word came out broken. "Please Sera, Just give me five minutes, that's all I'm asking."

I should have said no, should have turned around and walked back through those gates but something in his expression, the raw desperation, the pain..made me pause.

"Five minutes," I said. "Then you leave."

Relief flooded his face, "Thank you."

He moved closer and I saw him more clearly. The way his hands shook slightly, the paleness of his skin.

"You look different," he said quietly. "Stronger, more..."

"Powerful?" I finished. "That's what happens when you're not being treated like you're worthless."

"I never thought you were worthless."

"You rejected me in front of the entire pack," I said flatly. what would you call that?"

"A mistake." His voice cracked, the biggest mistake of my life.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"No, nothing I say will make it better, I know that." He ran a hand through his hair, and I noticed how it shook, "But I need you to know that I've regretted it every single day since. That I'm dying without you, that my wolf is going feral and I can barely control it anymore."

"That's not my problem."

"I know." He stepped closer, and I caught his scent, familiar and wrong at the same time. Underneath his natural scent was something bitter, "But I'm hoping, I'm begging for a chance to fix this, to fix us."

"There is no us," I said. "You made sure of that."

"The bond.."

"It's broken."

"Maybe it can be fixed," desperation in his voice.

"I don't care Thorne." I crossed my arms, "even if the bond could be fixed, why would I want it to be?"

He stared at me like I'd punched him. "Because we're mates, because the Moon Goddess chose us for each other."

"The Moon Goddess also watched you reject me and didn't intervene, maybe she changed her mind."

"Sera, please.."

"Why are you really here?" I demanded. "Is it because you actually care about me? Or because you're suffering and you want it to stop?"

"Both," he admitted. "I won't lie to you, I'm in pain, constant, excruciating pain. My wolf is tearing me apart from the inside but it's more than that. I miss you, I think about you constantly and seeing you now, seeing how strong you've become.."

"Makes you want me even more?" I laughed bitterly, "how convenient. When I was weak and invisible, I wasn't good enough but now that I have power, suddenly I'm worth fighting for?"

"That's not.."

"That's exactly what it is." I felt my power stir, responding to my anger, Silver light flickered around my fingers. "You want me back because I'm useful now, because being mated to a Silver Blood would be advantageous."

"No!" He reached for me, then stopped when I stepped back. "I want you back because I was an idiot, because I chose duty over love and it's destroying me, because you're my mate and I need you."

"You don't need me," I said coldly. "You need relief from the pain, there's a difference."

From the compound wall, I felt Kade's presence watching, waiting, ready to intervene if needed.

Thorne noticed my glance and followed it. His expression darkened when he saw Kade.

"Him?" Thorne's voice went hard. "The Rogue King?

"He's been training me, protecting me, treating me like I matter."

"I can do that too, I will do that." Thorne moved closer again, ignoring my warning look. "Come back to Silvermoon, be my mate, my Luna. I'll reject Vivian, I'll tell the Council to go to hell, whatever it takes."

"It's too late."

"It's not." He was begging now, his voice breaking. "Please Sera, I know I don't deserve forgiveness, I know what I did was unforgivable but I'm asking anyway, begging. I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you if you'll just give me a chance."

I looked at him, really looked at him. The man who'd been my dream for seven years, who I'd loved from afar, who'd shattered my heart.

And I felt... nothing, Just emptiness where he used to live in my heart.

"Your five minutes up," I said.

"Sera.."

"Go home, Thorne. Go back to Vivian and your political alliance, that's what you chose."

"I choose you," he said desperately. "I'm choosing you right now."

"Too late." I turned toward the gates. "You don't get to throw me away and then decide you want me back when it's convenient. I'm not a toy you can pick up and put down whenever you want."

"Please don't walk away." His voice cracked completely. "Please, I'll do anything."

I stopped and looked back at him. "Then leave and don't come back."

I walked through the gates without looking back.

Behind me, I heard him call my name. Once, twice, the desperation in his voice would have broken my heart a few months ago.

Now, it just echoed off the walls I'd built.

Marcus closed the gates, and I finally let myself breathe.

"You okay?" he asked quietly.

"I will be."

I looked up at the wall, Kade was gone.

I found him in the training grounds, pacing like a caged animal. His eyes flashed gold when he saw me.

"Did he touch you?" The question came out as a growl.

"No."

"Good because if he had.." Kade's hands clenched into fists. His control was hanging by a thread.

I moved close, "I'm fine Kade."

"He came here to take you back."

"I know."

"And?"

"And I sent him away." I met his wild eyes, I don't want to go back to Silvermoon, at least not now."

Something in Kade's expression shifted. The wildness receded slightly, replaced by something I couldn't quite name.

"He'll come back," Kade said.

"Probably."

"And if he does?"

"The answer will be the same." I touched his arm lightly. "I like where I am."

His hand covered mine, warm and steady. "You're sure?"

"I'm sure."

We stood there as the sun set, and I thought about how far I'd come.