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Chapter 8

Author: Dodie
Sophie turned to look at me, her eyes filled with resentment.

"She made you choose, didn't she?"

Nathan didn't look back.

"At the airport, she did make me choose. And I chose wrong."

The elevator doors opened in front of me.

I was about to step inside when Nathan suddenly hurried after me.

"I told her we were done. This time, it's really over."

I held the door-open button and looked at him.

"But Sophie was never the problem between us."

The elevator doors slowly slid shut.

Nathan tried to stop m
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  • The Stars We Lost   Chapter 10

    The weather was perfect the day we went to the observatory.Nathan arrived two hours early.He brought a thick blanket, water, and Stella's favorite snacks. He had thought of everything.When we had first married, he used to be this thoughtful.Back then, he remembered how easily I got cold. Whenever we went out to watch the night sky, he would always slip a thermos into my hands before we left.It wasn't that he'd become less patient.He had simply given that patience to Sophie, little by little, over the years.The wind was strong on the mountaintop.Stella bent over the telescope, determined to find the star cluster her teacher had mentioned.Nathan crouched beside her and adjusted the angle."Do you see it?"Stella pressed her eye to the eyepiece and gasped in delight."I see it! There are so many!"Nathan looked in the direction she was pointing."That's the Pleiades."Stella kept her eye on the lens."It looks like a little handful of candy."Nathan laughed and said, "You describ

  • The Stars We Lost   Chapter 9

    After the event, Stella ran down from the stage."Daddy, you didn't leave."Nathan crouched down and straightened the small badge on her chest."I made a promise."Stella looked at him and asked, "Does that mean you won't leave anymore?"Nathan crouched down in front of her. This time, he didn't make the easy promises he used to."I can't be with you every day. But from now on, whenever I promise you something, I'll do my best to keep it."At last, he understood that what a child needed wasn't a promise that would never be broken, but someone who kept his promises, one by one.Stella took off her junior presenter badge and pinned it to his coat."This is your reward."Nathan smiled, but tears rolled down his cheeks.As we left the planetarium, he stopped me at the door."Sophie's parents already took her home."I nodded. "Okay."As if afraid I had missed the point, he added, "I didn't go up to see her.""I know."He looked at me, his voice barely above a whisper. "Zara, isn't that enou

  • The Stars We Lost   Chapter 8

    Sophie turned to look at me, her eyes filled with resentment."She made you choose, didn't she?"Nathan didn't look back."At the airport, she did make me choose. And I chose wrong."The elevator doors opened in front of me.I was about to step inside when Nathan suddenly hurried after me."I told her we were done. This time, it's really over."I held the door-open button and looked at him."But Sophie was never the problem between us."The elevator doors slowly slid shut.Nathan tried to stop me, but before he could stop, the mediator hurried over from the other end of the hallway."Mr. Clarke, Ms. Mitchell's attorney has filed for divorce. Your case is now before the court."...A week before the hearing, the planetarium held its annual Kids' Stargazing Night.Stella was one of the junior presenters, introducing the Big Dipper.She had practiced at home for two full weeks for those few minutes on stage.Before the event began, Nathan sent me a message."I'm here."He was wearing a da

  • The Stars We Lost   Chapter 7

    At the first divorce mediation, Nathan didn't bring a lawyer.He laid the property documents, bank records, and insurance papers on the table."The house can be transferred into your name alone. And all the savings will be yours too."After a brief pause, he quietly stated his only condition."As long as you don't divorce me."The mediator turned to me and asked, "Ms. Mitchell, what are your thoughts?""We'll divide everything according to the law. I don't want anything I'm not entitled to."Nathan turned to me, panicked."Zara, I just want to give you some security."I reminded him calmly, "The security I need isn't another house after you've made a mistake."The mediation room went quiet.Whatever he'd planned to say, he couldn't bring himself to say it.After a while, he took out a printed list.He would spend two days a week with Stella.Family would come first on every holiday.He would no longer meet Sophie alone.He would attend marriage counseling.Every promise was specific.I

  • The Stars We Lost   Chapter 6

    Nathan stood outside for a long time.His phone lit up.The name on the screen was Sophie.Stella saw it too.Nathan declined the call in front of us."I won't leave today.""What about tomorrow?"He gripped the telescope tighter."Not tomorrow either."Stella didn't open the door."I don't want to watch them today."Nathan turned to me, a trace of exhaustion weighing on his face."Did you teach her to shut me out like this?""She remembered what you'd done."His lips moved, but in the end he said nothing. He set the telescope by the door."I'll come back on Saturday."I closed the door.The telescope stayed outside.Half an hour later, the motion-sensor light in the hallway went out.He never came back for the telescope.Over the next week, I settled into a new routine.Every morning, I took Stella to preschool.During the day, I worked on my illustration commissions.In the afternoons, I gave family astronomy tours at the planetarium.One of the regular instructors had gone on matern

  • The Stars We Lost   Chapter 5

    Nathan glanced over the divorce agreement, his expression darkening. "You're serious?""We'll divide the house according to the law. Stella stays with me. And you have three days to put the money back into our joint account.""I'm not agreeing to this."He closed the agreement."Because I took care of Sophie? Is that what this is really about?"I looked him in the eye. "Because you knew we'd be hurt, and you still chose her. Again and again."Nathan argued, "Her brother saved my life.""So we're supposed to spend the rest of our lives paying that debt?"Before he could answer, I pushed the agreement back toward him."Sign it."Nathan's hand pressed down on the papers."What if I don't?""Then I'll take you to court."Nathan stared at me, then suddenly pulled out his phone."You think a judge will give you Stella's custody?"On the screen were my medical records from the eight months I was treated for postpartum depression."Your income is unstable, and you were in treatment for eight m

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