Three Men Begging to Enter

I blinked.

“Hello there, pretty little thing,” said a man wearing a black shirt and pants. His dark hair blended perfectly with the night. While his yellow eyes stood out. It made me want to stare into his eyes more., to uncover the secrets behind those eyes.

Wait, no. They are birds. Not humans. Definitely birds. But did the blackbird just talked to me?

“Hey, Miss,” said another man who wore a brown shirt and blue jeans. When he talked, I was pretty sure I saw fangs on his teeth. He knocked on my window. “Can you let us in?” He had grey eyes, the same as me, but in a darker shade.

Now the brown bird is asking if they could come in.

I blinked again. And still the three men –birds would not go away.

The third man –the third bird, wore white all over his body. White tuxedo, white pants, his hair was also white and white leather shoes. His eyes were the most beautiful pair of eyes she had ever seen. It was light blue, very contrast to his dark skin.

Shit. Did I just admire a bird?

I blinked for the third time. And that was when I knew I had to take my aspirin. It was pretty common for the people of my condition to have an increased chance to experience fatigue than the normal population. There were days when I could not even get out of my bed. And sometimes, I got dizzy along the way too. I had also heard that some patients experience hallucinations.

Am I hallucinating now? Wow.

The brown bird knocked several times on my window again. “Hello?” He waved as if to asked if I was okay.

Hmm… I am totally not okay.

I walked back to my kitchen sink which in the small apartment could be seen from the huge window. Without taking my eyes off of the three men –birds, I picked a glass and filled it with water. Then I took my aspirin from the cabinet on top of me and gulped down two tablets at once. I used the water to lubricate my throat. Then I finally closed my eyes. With my body leaning on the kitchen sink, I waited for the drugs to kick in.

I hoped it was just dizziness and not a hallucination. See, my type of cancer doesn’t usually give hallucination as its symptoms… unless it is in an advanced stage to which my body could not compensate for the cancerous cells anymore. Hallucinations then can come in due to hormonal imbalance or sometimes it is actually the side effect of chemotherapy.

Well, as of that day, I had not taken any chemotherapy. I only took medicines to improved my symptoms such as fatigue and occasional dizziness. Also, I took care of my meals. As my blood cells were the ones acting as cancerous cells, I made it my priority to lessen the burden of my vascular system. I ate less salt, less sugar, and I avoided high saturated diets.

I had been fine for some time. I was completely fine even after the diagnosis.

I was fine.

But apparently, I was hallucinating then. It was like a big slap in my face. I kept thinking about whether my disease had taken much-advanced progress in such a short time. Whether my disease had been winning against my body without me noticing it.

No. No. I’m just tired today, I tried to convince myself.

Yet I could still hear one of the men saying, “Arianna?”

I flicked my eyes open and stared straight to my window. The three men were still staring at me. The men wearing all black clothes had a worried expression. His thick dark eyebrows furrowed. “Arianna?” he asked. His tone wavered a little bit.

At that point, I realized that there was no way a bird could look like that. The glass in my hand dropped to the floor. It shattered to ungraceful pieces. But I held my stare to the men.

Winning against life is impossible, it seems.

Then I laughed. I burst out laughing so hard that tears were formed in my eyes. It was so utterly hilarious. Life just had to bring me down that day, reminding me that I could never win against my illness. I was definitely hallucinating. And out of all, I hallucinated about three flying men.

I took a few steps nearing the window. “Hey, careful,” the men in black said. He still had on that worried look. And the worry seemed to spread to the other men too. “Watch your steps.”

I did not care about my steps. My feet stepped on a few tiny pieces of glasses that I knew would not hurt me. And still, I did not watch my steps as I almost stepped on a bigger piece of glass.

“Arianna.” The man in white growled at her.

Aww… my hallucination buddies are worried about me. Very comforting.

I took out a bottle of vodka from my lower cabinet. I was thinking of getting a glass to drink it with but then I decided against it. With a bottle of fully sealed vodka, I ended up tiptoeing to near my window again. I took in every three men in the eyes before I clumsily opened the bottle cap and took a huge gulp. The liquid drip out from my mouth and trailed to my neck and chest. But I did not stop until I felt dizzier.

When I stopped chugging the alcohol, I looked at the men again. All three had horrified looks painted on their faces. My steps staggered. Until finally my legs would not hold my body anymore and I stumbled to the floor. I managed to save the vodka so everything was good.

“Arianna, let us in!” the men in black cried out. He banged my window glass hard. The men in brown also did the same. “C’mon, just let us in first. We can accompany you to a drink. But let us in first.” Only the man in white stayed still. His light blue eyes were cold as they took my form in.

They bang my window hard multiple times that I wondered how my normal glass window was still holding on. There was not even a crack on the glass. Until I realized that I was hallucinating so I took another huge chug of vodka.

From my sitting position, I finally looked at them, like really looked at them.

Daym! My hallucination men are hot!

Like seriously. They all looked very delicious. Their bodies seemed tone, their faces were cute too.

They remind me of Alexander–

Holy shit! Did I just say his name out loud? I could not believe that after a few weeks of having no contact with that ‘sugar daddy’ of mine, I haven’t totally forgotten about him.

I took another big chug of vodka. As I saw the men began to panic and bang on my window glasses more ferociously, I got more dizzy. Each pounding sounded so loud in my head.

So, I raised my bottle to them. And chugged more alcohol. I think I almost drowned my throat in vodka. It burnt so much. But the effect afterward was exactly what I was looking for.

I got so dizzy that I had to lie down on my carpet. The bottle rolled on the floor with some liquid pouring out. For a long time, I only stared at them. I wondered why my hallucination men looked so worried about me. Even I myself was not worried at all.

I am completely fine.

The pull of darkness was getting stronger and stronger. It was sad to say goodbye to my hot hallucination men but my eyes would not compromise. I slept with alcohol burning my system and three flying men still begging for me to let them in.

Why couldn’t they let themselves in? Well, they were my hallucination anyway. I should not have thought hard about it.