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The Whole Family’s Regret After I Died
The Whole Family’s Regret After I Died
Author: Alyssa J

Chapter 1

Author: Alyssa J
After I died, my spirit didn't fade. I drifted into the living room.

Elena's face was pale, almost gray, and her lips had lost their color.

A three-tiered cake sat in the center of the dining table, frosted in pink cream, with "Happy Birthday, Little Princess" written across the top.

Mom had her arms around Elena's shoulders from behind, her chin resting on top of Elena's head. Dad sat across from them with both hands shoved into his hair, perfectly still.

"I thought I heard Emma calling out from the cellar just now." Elena's voice was so faint it almost wasn't there. "Can someone go check on her?"

Mom pulled her in tighter. "She's fine. You know how she gets. Every single birthday of yours, she pulls something. Every time."

"But what if she's really—"

"That's enough." Dad finally spoke, his voice low and controlled. "Today is your last birthday. No one is going to ruin it."

He swallowed when he said "last."

Mom buried her face in Elena's hair, and a tear slipped from the corner of her eye.

Elena didn't say anything more, but she glanced toward the cellar with worry, then quietly cut a slice of cake and set it aside for me.

Elena never took the favoritism for granted. If anything, she understood better than anyone what it meant: every good thing that landed on her was something taken from me.

So she'd been quietly trying to make it up to me.

Winter nights when Mom only brought extra blankets for Elena, she'd creep over barefoot in the dark and tuck the edge of her blanket around me, then go back and shiver under a thin sheet.

When guests came with sweets and left them all in front of her, she wouldn't eat a single one. She'd stuff them in her pockets and press the whole pile into my hands after Mom and Dad had gone to sleep.

Every time I got sent to stand in the corner, Elena would rush over and grab my arm. "I made her do it. Punish me instead."

She always said the same thing to me: "Emma, I'm sorry. If it weren't for this curse, they wouldn't treat you this way."

But Mom and Dad never saw it like that.

"She's always hated seeing you happy." Across the table, Mom was speaking softly to Elena, her voice thick with tenderness. "You took her entire curse onto yourself, and she can't even be grateful. How can you still worry about her?"

Mom's expression hardened. "Have you forgotten what happened when you turned twelve?"

I hadn't forgotten. That was the first time I really understood what Elena's curse mark actually meant.

On Elena's twelfth birthday, Dad took a rare half-day off work. Mom had been up since five in the morning making rich broth, roasting lamb, filling the table with everything Elena loved.

Dad had also brought home a delicate moonstone bracelet, forged by one of the elvish craftsmen in town. It cost him two months' wages.

He bent down and clasped it onto Elena's wrist himself while Mom stood nearby filming on her phone, face wet with tears.

I watched from the kitchen doorway.

I can't say exactly what I was thinking. I just remember I ran forward and swept the whole table clear with my arm.

Bowls shattered. Broth splashed over Mom's feet and she hissed in pain.

"It's my birthday too! Why does she get everything!"

I stood there screaming in the middle of the wreckage, like something feral and cornered.

It wasn't just jealousy, not entirely. It was because I'd suddenly seen it clearly: Dad saving two months' salary for a bracelet, Mom up before dawn cooking, both of them crying as they filmed her.

They weren't celebrating a birthday. They were counting down the days she had left.

But I was too young. The real words were jammed somewhere in my chest and I couldn't get them out. The only thing that came out was the ugliest version.

Dad's face went dark. He picked me up, threw me into my bedroom, and locked it from outside.

No one brought me food for the entire day.

In the middle of the night, the lock clicked.

Elena was crouching in the doorway holding a cold bread roll and half a cup of water. The bread was hard as a rock, and both her knees were scraped raw.

I found out later that she'd climbed on a stool to reach the key in Mom and Dad's dresser drawer, the stool tipped, and she fell straight down.

She pressed the bread into my hand, crouched beside me, and used her sleeve to wipe the dried tears from my face.

"Stop crying, okay?"

She smiled a little. Her eyes were so red it looked like they might bleed.

"When I'm gone, everything will be yours. Lamb roast whenever you want, bracelet whenever you want... okay?"

At the table, Mom was still talking.

"Emma's ungrateful. After everything Elena's done, bearing the whole curse for her, and Emma still resents us for loving Elena. She's always been that way."

I floated in the air above them, unable to argue. She wasn't entirely wrong. I was jealous.

Jealous that when Elena got sick, someone held her all night. Jealous that she could say "Mom" and get a hug. Jealous of eighteen years of being cherished, while I screamed until my throat gave out and nobody came.

I drifted toward Elena, wanting to hold her, wanting to tell her I really was sick, my stomach really did hurt, I wasn't lying. But my fingers passed right through her shoulder.

I looked down at my hand. Transparent.

I drifted through the cellar door and looked at the girl curled up in the corner. That was me.

I was already dead, and the one who had taken the full weight of the curse in the end was me.
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  • The Whole Family’s Regret After I Died   Chapter 9

    Grandpa carried me home, step by step, deep into the forest.I drifted at his side, watching his profile.The sun was nearly down, and the light caught every line in his face. His lips were pressed closed, the muscles in his jaw tight. His arms were locked around the soul crystal, holding it like he was afraid that if he let go it would shatter.He didn't walk fast, but he never stopped.By the time he got home, the sky was fully dark.Grandpa's courtyard was small: a low wall built from stone, a wooden gate that creaked on its hinges when he pushed it open. Inside, no light. He felt around for a matchbox and went through three strikes before one caught, his hands shaking too badly.A candle. Half a white one left on the kitchen windowsill, the wick already burned down once, the flame thin and not strong enough to fill the room. Just enough to light a small patch of the big oak table in the center.Grandpa set the soul crystal in the middle of the table, then opened the kitchen cupboar

  • The Whole Family’s Regret After I Died   Chapter 8

    When an elf dies, they are dressed in a resting shroud so their spirit can return to the embrace of the Forest Goddess.Grandpa chose the shroud himself, from a side street behind Silverleaf Town's burial hall, the oldest resting-cloth shop on the block. He went alone and didn't bring anyone with him.When he came back he was carrying a cloth bundle. He opened it: a pale-yellow shroud, small, with a ring of tiny embroidered flowers at the collar and sleeves that gathered in fine narrow cuffs, exactly the color and style I'd always loved.The finest thing I ever wore in my life was my burial shroud.Grandpa laid me out on the wooden board himself and changed my clothes himself.Mom stood in the doorway, hand reaching in. "Out," Grandpa said, without looking up."Dad, let me help dress her. She always hated the cold, I know exactly how to do up the buttons so she won't—""I said out."He looked up at last. "You had no right to worry whether she was warm or cold while she was alive. It's

  • The Whole Family’s Regret After I Died   Chapter 7

    Uncle Aldric from next door had heard the crying and pushed open the door, which had been left unlatched.He was still holding a few sprigs of rosemary he'd cut from the garden, peering in from the entryway. He first saw the half-hung streamers and scattered balloons, then the heap of people on the floor."What's going on?"His eyes made a quick circuit of the room and landed on me in Grandpa's arms. His expression moved from confusion to the particular knowing look of someone who'd already guessed."Ah, so she didn't make it after all."He shook his head and lowered his voice, his tone carrying a thin layer of sympathy over something thicker and more interested. "I saw your lights on all night, figured you were keeping vigil. Elena's had it rough, poor girl. Eighteen years, that's no time at—""It's not Elena."Dad lifted his head from the floor, eyes full of red.Uncle Aldric's expression snagged. He leaned in, looked closer, and recognized the face in Grandpa's arms."Emma?"His voi

  • The Whole Family’s Regret After I Died   Chapter 6

    The first thing Elena did when she came around was call my name."Emma—"Mom pressed down on her shoulders, pushing her back against the pillow. "Lie still. You hit your head when you fell—"Elena shoved Mom's hands off. "Where is Emma?"Mom didn't answer. Her eyes were so swollen they'd nearly closed, her whole face bloated like it had been soaked in water. Her mouth opened and closed twice. Nothing came out.Elena understood everything.She threw back the blanket and stepped out barefoot, pushing past Mom into the hall.In the living room, Dad was sitting against the wall like a doll someone had dropped there and forgotten. He was holding me. Both arms around me, pulled in tight, fingers twisted into my clothes, knuckles white.Elena stopped three steps away. She saw my face.Ashen gray. Hair stuck to my forehead. Eyes closed. Curled in against Dad's chest, small as a cat that never got the chance to grow."Dad."Elena's voice was barely there.Dad didn't respond."Dad. Give Emma to

  • The Whole Family’s Regret After I Died   Chapter 5

    Dad didn't go in.He stood in the doorway with one hand gripping the frame, like he'd been nailed to the floor. Morning light came in from behind him, stretching his shadow out long and thin, while his face stayed in darkness."What's going on?" Mom still had her arms around Elena and was smiling as she leaned in to look. "Come on, call Emma out, let her share in the good news—"Dad's arm came across the doorway. "Don't come in."Mom's smile stopped where it was.Elena slipped out from under Mom's arm and stood on her toes to look inside. The light was dim, just what crept in through the gap at the door and a narrow air vent up high, enough to light a small patch of stone floor. And on that floor, a figure lying on her side."Emma?"Elena's voice still had a laugh tucked in it, light and careful. "Stop pretending to sleep. Come on, the curse didn't work. I'm okay."The figure on the stone floor didn't move. Her chest didn't rise. Not even a strand of hair stirred with breathing.The sm

  • The Whole Family’s Regret After I Died   Chapter 4

    Mom's fingers tightened around the half-blown balloon."Asleep," she said, not meeting Grandpa's eyes. "She wore herself out today. Fell asleep early."Grandpa didn't respond. His gaze moved from Mom's face to the far end of the hallway, toward the cellar."Take me to see her.""Dad, she's sleeping soundly, we shouldn't—""I said take me to see her."Mom's hands stopped.Dad stepped in from the side. "Dad, actually, we locked Emma in the cellar. She was acting out all day and we were worried she'd—"He didn't finish.Grandpa's hands, resting on his knees, clenched into fists. "Say that again."He raised his head. The red in his eyes had doubled since he'd walked in. "You locked Emma where?""Dad, tomorrow is Elena's last—""I'm not deaf!"Grandpa's palm came down on the coffee table. The cream mushroom soup splashed over the rim. His whole body was shaking, lips trembling."Elena is cursed. I know that. I feel every bit of it, and her grandmother died without being able to let her go.

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