Chapter 30

Selena’s POV

I couldn’t stop smiling.

Not the polite kind of smile. Not the “thank you for the tea” or “what a lovely gift” kind.

This one was stuck. Pressed into the corners of my mouth like it had taken root.

All because of a picnic.

I remembered every detail because it was like a dream to me

A dream that I didn’t want to wake up from.

The laughter repeated itself in my head

I could remember every hum in his voice

The way his throat moved

Tye baritone it carried and how free he looked.

Even after we got back. Even after the everywhere had become dark

And we could barely find our way out of the garden

I could still feel the warmth of it.

The warmth of them.

Of him.

I hadn’t realized how long it had been since I laughed like that.

Real laughter. The kind that caught you off guard and curled your toes with joy.

Not the polite chuckles I gave Sisi to keep her happy.

Not the hollow hums I used to hide how tired I was.

But laughter that felt like light pushing past the fog.

Sisi was skipping beside me, still talking about the crown she made. It sat lopsided on her curls, a patchwork of dandelions, daisies, and one stubborn weed she’d insisted was a “magic leaf.”

“And then Daddy put the jelly on the wrong sandwich!” she announced, giggling. “And he still ate it even though it had mustard! Mommy, did you see his face?”

I smiled, adjusting the basket on my hip. “He was trying to be brave.”

“He’s funny when he’s brave.” She twirled around me, arms flailing. “Can we do it again tomorrow?”

I didn’t answer right away. The word yes sat on my tongue like a secret I wasn’t sure I was allowed to tell.

Because something had shifted today.

Something had cracked open.

And I knew it would come woth change

That was the oart I wasn’t sure I was ready for yet

The change oart

Cause change demanded a lot of things

And change could wreck you.

Cassian had laughed

Cassian had laughed. Not just once.

Not just a soft exhale or a crooked smirk. But truly laughed.

And when Sisi smeared cream on his cheek and crowned him King of the Picnic, he’d gone along with it like it was the most natural thing in the world.

And me?

I watched him.

I watched the way the lines in his face softened. How he let Sisi sit in his lap and braid dandelions into his sleeve. How he looked at her like he was trying to memorize the curve of her smile.

And for a moment

Just for a moment, I forgot the man who’d insulted my entire being at the cell. The man who had called me two nights before to remind me of my place

I saw something else.

Someone else.

Someone I didn’t know… but maybe wanted to.

Maybe it was because of the way he acted during the picnic

He’d grinned at her. And then at me.

That was what stayed with me. Long after the food had been packed away, long after the breeze stopped playing with the edges of my skirt.

The way he looked at me.

Like I was more than the woman he’d hired. More than the mistake he thought I was.

He’d looked at me like I was home.

And God, did butterflies flutter in my stomach

We reached the palace steps just as the wind picked up again. I tightened Sisi’s shawl around her shoulders and held her hand as we climbed.

Cassian trailed behind us, quiet, but not in that closed-off way he used to be. This silence felt different. Like he wasn’t keeping me out. Just… letting something settle inside himself.

When we got to the top, he surprised me.

“I’ll take the basket,”

I froze

Processing tye image of his outstretched arm

Then he waved in my face, calling me back to my senses.

‘fuck’

I cursed under breath, blinking repeatedly befire finally looking up at him. “It’s okay. I’ve got it.”

“I know.” His fingers brushed mine. “But let me.”

There was no challenge in his tone. No smirk. No arrogance.

Just a quiet offer.

I let go.

And something in me went with it.

I didn’t dare say anything about it.

Didn’t want to break the spell.

Sisi spun on her heel. “Mommy! Guess what?”

I raised a brow. “What, my little whirlwind?”

She beamed. “Daddy said my flower crown looked like it was made by a real fairy!”

Cassian made a sound behind us

I wasn’t sure what exactly it was

Maybe it was a mixture of both

A chuckle and the clearing of his throat.

I turned just enough to catch his face. The tips of his ears were pink.

He met my eyes.

And then looked away.

It felt like the high school romance I was used to read.

Like he was still figuring out what to do with me now that I wasn’t angry. Now that I’d smiled back. Now that I’d laughed too.

By the time we reached the biggest living room in the house,

Sisi’s energy had tripled.

Most times I wondered if it was normal for a child to be so energetic.

She flung herself onto the couch dramatically, legs kicking the air. “That was the best day of my whole life!”

I glanced at Cassian.

I didn’t know why but I was silently praying.

Praying that he would make one his sarcastic remarks

Or thst his lips would curve up in thst smirk i had all too grown fond.

“That’s quite the honor.”

He shrugged one shoulder. “She’s only had six years. Low bar.”

Sisi gasped. “Daddy!”

I laughed. A real one.

He looked over, and for a second—just a second—he smiled back.

A small one. But real.

It was gone before I could blink my eye, but it did have an effect on me still.

My heart did something dangerous.

Later, after dinner and a warm bath, I stood in front of the mirror rubbing lotion into my arms.

Sisi’s towel was drying by the side of the tub. My own towel was wrapped around me, tucked securely, or so I thought.

I’d just finished bathing Sisi and helping her into her pajamas

It was a soft yellow nightgown with a faded sun stitched over the chest.

She was humming a song from earlier, the one we made up about the “Royal Jelly Sandwich Disaster.”

She kept going on and on about the picnic.

“And then you made the best sandwiches, Mommy. And the lemonade had real lemons! And Daddy didn’t even yell once!”

I raised an eyebrow. “Is that the standard now?”

She nodded solemnly. “No yelling equals the best day.”

I ruffled her hair. “Well, I think we all had fun.”

“Even Daddy?”

I paused.

Then nodded. “Even Daddy.”

She grinned.

I handed her a small lotion bottle. “Here, baby. You do your arms, and I’ll do your back.”

“I want to smell like Mommy,” she said, unscrewing the cap and inhaling dramatically. “Mmm, like flowers and clouds.”

I was rubbing lotion on her shoulders when she turned her head slightly. “Can I sleep in your bed tonight?”

I smiled. “Of course, sweetheart.”

I was humming to myself now and sisi? Well she was on the bed talking to stuffed animals or something.

I peeled off my robe and stood in front of the mirror, reaching for my lotion. My skin still smelled like sunlight and grass. The air still held the memory of laughter and lemonade.

I started smoothing the lotion over my arms, then my shoulders. The towel wrapped around me began to slip—just as the door swung open.

“Selena, I—”

Cassian froze.

My heart jumped.

and I did too .

Cassian stood in the doorway, half inside, looking like he hadn’t expected me to be—

My towel slipped.

Not much. Just enough.

“Oh—” I scrambled to catch it, grabbing the top before it could slide further.

Cassian froze.

“I—I didn’t know you were—” His voice cracked.

I was turned slightly away from him, one hand across my chest, the other holding the towel in place. “A knock would’ve been helpful.”

“I thought you were still—” He stepped forward automatically, and in that same breath, reached out like instinct. His hand brushed my shoulder, catching the edge of the towel before it could fall again.

Just that.

Just skin meeting skin.

But the jolt of it—

It felt like lightning. A rush of warmth traveled up my spine, through my chest, blooming beneath my ribs.

I breathed in sharply.

His eyes met mine. “Sorry,” he whispered still not pulling back.

I stepped back. Just enough to give us both air. “Thanks. I’ve got it.”

He nodded. But didn’t move.

“It’s okay,” I hurriedly added, pulling the towel tighter and stepping back. “I was just—finishing up.”

His hand was still half-raised. He lowered it slowly.

“I just… came to check if Sisi was with you. I knocked, but you didn’t answer.”

Then, behind us, came the sound of tiny feet.

“Mommy?”

Sisi stood at the threshold in her pajamas, hair still damp, holding her storybook like a shield.

I tightened my towel and turned fully toward her. “Yes, baby?”

“I want to sleep in my room tonight.”

I blinked. “You do?”

She nodded.

“You don’t want to sleep here with us?”

I was hoping that she would change her mind

Or maybe offer fit me to spend the night with her

Then it clicked

Didn’t she just offer to spend the night here?

Then why the sudden…?

Oh this little sneak!

She hesitated. “I think… I’m big enough now. And I want to read my book to Mr. Moon by myself.”

Mr. Moon was the stuffed rabbit.

Cassian looked just as stunned as I felt.

“Oh. Okay,” I nodded slowly . “Want me to come lie down with you for a little while?”

She shook her head. “I’ll be okay.”

But then she held her arms out. “Just tuck me in?”

I nodded.

We walked together to her room, her hand warm in mine.

Cassian followed but remembered at the door while I helped her climb under the covers, fixed her blanket, and kissed her forehead.

I had just pulled her covers to her chin and kissed her forehead.

She looked up at me with sleepy eyes. “I love you, Mommy.”

“I love you too.”

“To the moon?”

“And back.”

She turned onto her side and mumbled, “Tell Daddy I love him too… even when he puts jelly on mustard.”

I laughed softly, brushing a curl from her cheek. “I’ll tell him.”

“Goodnight, baby.”

“Night, Mommy.”

She looked over my shoulder. “Night, Daddy.”

“Goodnight, little shadow,” he said.

And then she turned over, pulling Mr. Moon close.

We stepped out quietly.

And for a moment, just stood there in the hallway.

The silence wasn’t awkward.

It was… soft.

I exhaled. “She’s growing up.”

“She is.”

I walked into the bedroom, pulled one of the spare pillows off the bed, and padded toward the couch.

He watched me.

He had been watching me since we left sisi’s room

I dropped the pillow and sat down.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

I looked up at him.

And paused.

His voice hadn’t been sharp.

It wasn’t even annoyed.

Just confused.

But that confusion did something to me.

Because it wasn’t the first time I’d moved away. Wasn’t the first time I’d given him space, put distance between us because I thought it was what he wanted.

But maybe this time… he didn’t.

Maybe this time, he wasn’t sure he wanted the space.

I sat on the edge of the couch, the pillow in my lap.

“I thought I’d let you have the bed tonight.”

He didn’t move.

Didn’t answer.

Just stared.

We stood there.

Not awkward.

But… aware.

Too aware.

The pillow hugged to my chest.

I didn’t turn.

Not yet.