I wake to the incessant ringing of my doorbell. I fling on my robe before opening the door to find a courier standing there, holding a stack of packages. "Ms Walker?" he asks. I nod and sign for my parcels before heading back into my flat. My tiny studio is sparse; the escalation of my mother's disease and mounting costs for her care has directly correlated with the slow selling off of my worldly goods and the downsizing of my living arrangements.
I leave the parcels on the table and then head over to the cupboard that houses the little kitchenette area. I pop the kettle on and make myself a cup of tea before sitting down to open the packages. The first box contains a smartphone, all shiny and new compared with the completely basic phone that I own. There is no note attached, but I assume that this is from Alex. After all, who else would be sending me things?
I plug the phone in to charge before turning my attention to a large flat box. When I finally pull out the contents, I find myself holding a small laptop and I guess it is one of those Chromebook computers that seem to be all the rage at the moment. Not sure if it needs charging as well, I plug the computer in and then turn my attention to the third and final package. Seconds later and I am holding the manuscript in my hands along with a handwritten note from Alex:
Dear Olivia,
As promised here is your manuscript. I trust that you will still honour our arrangement. We can discuss payment separately.The laptop and phone are encrypted, so please ensure that you use them for all communication between us. You will find my details already stored on both devices, and I have set up a new email account for you.I have emailed you a copy of the prenuptial agreement that I have drawn up. If you are happy with the terms, you can sign it electronically and email it back.Any questions, just drop me an email.All the best,AlexThe note is impersonal and business-like, which suits me fine. This is a business arrangement, after all. I sip on my tea as I wait for the laptop to load. When the home screen is finally up, I click on the email icon and then open up the email that is waiting for me.
I read through the attached document, my brain swimming as I try to read between the lines of 'legalese'. As I understand it, the contract states that if we remain married for a full year, Alex will take care of all my debts and my mother's care for the year that we are together and I will get a payout of a million pounds when we divorce. What surprises me most is the caveat about 'extramarital relations'. It appears that I am perfectly fine to have a lover as long as I am discreet. Okay, I hadn't even thought about that. It also states that Alex will also be able to make his visits to his 'club', though I am not sure what that means. Maybe this lifestyle thing is a secret society or something equally obscure. I find myself grinning as my imagination conjures up an image of hooded men exchanging strange handshakes in a darkened room lined with sconces.
I spend some time chewing over the document as I finish my cup of tea, trying to figure out the source of my unease. It is not the idea of being able to have another relationship whilst being married; I will be fine…it's not like I am not used to being on my own, but a year is a long time for a guy to go without, I guess. No, it is the idea of the payoff at the end. With trembling fingers, I reach for the new phone, find Alex's direct line and hit dial. I am relieved when he answers after a couple of rings.
"Good morning, Olivia," says Alex smoothly. I wonder how the hell he knows it is me, but then I realise he has already programmed his number, so it stands to reason he knows mine.
"Morning, Alex. Are you okay to chat for a couple of minutes? I don't want to interrupt your day," I ask. Inwardly I am cursing the tremble that I hear in my voice, the nerves making themselves apparent.
"Sure thing. I guess you have had a chance to read through the document?" Alex asks, his voice calm and even, as if he is completely unaffected by the deal we are about to strike.
"Yes. And thank you for the phone and laptop, by the way. You didn't need to," I say, still feeling a little weirded out by Alex's generosity. There was no need to have sent over what must be top-of-the-line gadgets; basic models would have certainly done me.
"Actually I did. I need to know that our conversations are secure. I can't risk this kind of information getting out. So what can I help you with?" asks Alex.
"Um, the payoff…the million pounds…I don't want it!" I blurt, anxiety flooding me.
For a moment, there is silence. "You don't want the money?" Alex sounds incredulous.
"No, look, I appreciate your helping with my mother's care and looking after me during the year we are married, but there is no need for anything else. Really, I don't want it. It is not something I will have earned." I can hear my voice rising, but I try my best to control my emotions.
"Believe me, you will have earned it by the end of the year," Alex retorts, his voice hard and firm.
"Even so, Alex. I don't feel comfortable with taking that kind of money. Please…I am happy to agree to everything else, but could you take that point out?" I request, and I hate myself when I hear the quaver in my voice. I don't want to beg, but damn it, I will if I have to. This is just not something I will compromise on.
With a sigh, Alex acquiesces and promises me that a new version will be sent out within the hour. When I put the phone down, it immediately rings again and, puzzled by the unknown number showing on the screen along with the uncertainty of who would actually have this number, I answer with a cautious, "Hello?"
I am beyond surprised when the director of the care facility introduces herself, and my stomach twists into knots as I wait for her to start talking about chucking my mother out. Instead, she starts gushing about the very generous donation that my fiancé has made to the facility. That, combined with the news that my mother has now been moved to a superior room with a view of the garden, already prepaid for the coming year, brings silent tears to my eyes. It would seem that Alex has already been very busy this morning.
When I finally get off the phone, I break down with the relief that my mother is going to be okay. I sob loudly, letting out all the stress and tension that I have been keeping locked up tight. The crying is cathartic, and by the time my tears start to dry up, I finally feel something haven't for a very long time…hope.
The background roar of the plane's engines filters through my dreams. I am lying in my first-class bed with my eyes closed, contemplating the last ten days. In such a short space of time, Alex has turned my world upside down. Once the agreement was signed, he insisted I give notice on my flat, as well as my supplementary jobs, and move into his townhouse in Chelsea. I managed to stall—though in hindsight I really wonder why—so now my meagre possessions are being moved by his housekeeper while I am flying and I feel guilty that someone is being forced to deal with my mess.My boss, Charles, was delighted with the manuscript, though I never let him know what lengths it took to get it for him. He wouldn't have been interested anyway! Instead, I requested the holiday leave I am entitled to and let him know that I would be coming back from Australia married. I almost laughed at the look of surprise on his face when I told him, but managed to stay cool and professional.I keep my eyes close
"Wake up, sleepyhead." Strong fingers grip my shoulder gently and I feel myself being shaken from my deep slumber. I mumble, wondering who the hell is waking me up, as I roll over onto my back. I crack open my eyes to find Alex staring back at me, and it feels a little like déjà vu as he looks at me with that same expression he had on the plane."Argh, what time is it?" I ask, running a hand through my hair."Just after one. Thought you might be hungry." Alex responds, just as my stomach lets out a grumble, making us both laugh."You thought right," I say. "Yeah, food would be good.""Come on. I thought we could eat down at the grill by the pool. There should be a bit of a breeze and you won't catch too much sun." I glance down at my shoulders and can see the smattering of freckles coming through where the sun caught me earlier.We make our way down through the hotel and find a free table at the grill. I watch the people splashing around in the water and make a note to dig out my cost
The smell of bacon has me climbing out of bed. I follow my nose and find myself in the living area staring at a table filled with food. A rustle alerts me to Alex's presence on the sofa and I squeak out a startled "Good morning.""I wondered if you were going to join the land of the living any time soon," Alex says with a smirk across his face. "Dig in. I've already eaten."Ooh, there is too much choice. My eyes wander over a mound of delectable pastries and a platter of fresh fruit, and I take a moment to lift various cloches where I find the makings of a full English. I pour myself a cup of tea from a pot standing on the side and sip on the steaming brew as I contemplate what I feel like eating. I help myself to a stack of pancakes that I spy, add a couple of crispy rashers of bacon and then pour over some gloriously sticky maple syrup. I settle down on the corner to eat and find myself groaning in appreciation as I take a mouthful. Seriously, this is food heaven. "Oh my god, I am g
The next couple of days fly by and before I know it my wedding day is here. I stare at myself in the mirror and take in the sight of myself. My hair has been swept up at the front and styled to include a beautifully delicate silver headband studded with tiny turquoise crystals. My makeup is subtle with that 'barely there' look that takes a thousand layers to achieve. And my dress is like a second skin, hugging my body and giving me curves where I was lacking.I know I have only a few minutes before I need to make my way downstairs, and I have to force myself to take a couple of deep breaths to calm myself. Despite Alex's intention of us staying at the hotel, Sheila nearly had a fit when he told her and she insisted that the night before the wedding we would be staying in the family home—separate bedrooms of course, which made us chuckle.In a feeble attempt at distracting myself, I think back to what it was like meeting Alex's family yesterday. The first thing that hit me as we walked
The next couple of days fly by and before I know it my wedding day is here. I stare at myself in the mirror and take in the sight of myself. My hair has been swept up at the front and styled to include a beautifully delicate silver headband studded with tiny turquoise crystals. My makeup is subtle with that 'barely there' look that takes a thousand layers to achieve. And my dress is like a second skin, hugging my body and giving me curves where I was lacking.I know I have only a few minutes before I need to make my way downstairs, and I have to force myself to take a couple of deep breaths to calm myself. Despite Alex's intention of us staying at the hotel, Sheila nearly had a fit when he told her and she insisted that the night before the wedding we would be staying in the family home—separate bedrooms of course, which made us chuckle.In a feeble attempt at distracting myself, I think back to what it was like meeting Alex's family yesterday. The first thing that hit me as we walked
Our time in Bali is magical for me. When we finally walked into our villa—the presidential suite, no less—after a moderately long flight and transfer, I was fit to drop. Yet the moment I stood on the patio overlooking the Indian Ocean, my exhaustion lifted completely and poor Alex had to watch me squeal with excitement as I explored every corner of the suite. Luxurious is not an adequate description of the villa. I mean, there is a bar complete with a pool table and a grand piano, for heaven's sake. Once again, Alex insisted I take the master bedroom and I had only a moment of guilt before happily accepting and bouncing on the enormous bed like a five-year-old.For the last few days, we have simply relaxed, enjoying our private infinity pool and even making use of the spa. In the short time my relationship with Alex has developed, I would actually go so far as to say that we are friends. Weird, I know, but when I agreed to marry him, the last thing I had expected was friendship. I hav
The rain beats down the side of the bus and I shiver in my coat, despite the heat blasting out through the heaters. Despite being back in London for over a week now, my body still hasn't re-acclimatised to the December weather after the glorious sunshine I have been used to. Lost in my memories of Bali and riding elephants in the reserve, I almost miss my stop, but thankfully someone else rings the bell, breaking me out of my reverie.I hurry through the rain as I make the short walk home along the square, the park beside me completely invisible in the inclement weather. I finally make it to the front door, where I hurriedly let myself in. As I hang up my dripping coat and stow my umbrella away, I am aware of the silence of the house and wonder whether Alex will make it back tonight.Each night since we got back, I have made him dinner and waited up with no success. And every morning when I wake the dinner has been placed in the fridge uneaten. On the flight back to London, it was lik
I sit in the pew of the crematorium at Hendon Cemetery as the celebrant begins the service. As I look at my mother's coffin, I can't help but be glad that death claimed her in the way it did, silently in her sleep. An early morning phone call a week ago let me know that she had suffered a massive stroke during the night.In truth, her death has been a bit of a relief; her quality of life had been deteriorating over the last couple of years and Alzheimer's had stripped her of the person she was. Instead, the woman I had been visiting the last few years was convinced she was eighteen and she had the mouth of a sailor. The mother I knew disappeared a long time ago, and even though I have had time to mourn that loss, the grief still bites, opening up the scar that I thought had long since healed.A sound startles me and then a body slides into the seat next to me. I don't have to look up to know that it is Alex."I thought you were in America?" I whisper. Since our encounter in the baseme