The best part of the day

Accompanying Gamu while she ran her morning errands became my daily routine. 

Wake up at the crow of the rooster. Tidy the hut, sweep the leaves and dust from around the it. Wash and hang up laundry, cook, and finally, my personal favorite, fetch water at the well. 

Gamu would never speak to me whenever the chief or Furah was around. She behaved like a complete stranger towards me and acted as if she had no emotion whatsoever. She only laughed when the chieftess laughed with her.

She was predictable though. So predictable that I could time the point when she would start humming or singing.

Before we went to the well, we would always stop at the beautiful river for me to bathe, then the next, for her. 

And every time, before we reached the river, we would stop in the forest to listen. We would sing and then dance.

Then we would make it up the hill.

Three buckets.

She and I.

And sometimes two men, fetching water or leaving just as we were arriving.

 Rare. But sometimes I felt like hiking that hill every morning was the only thing keeping me sane. 

Yoke would always greet Gamu first, then he and I would talk or laugh about the stories he would tell me. Uma always stood closest to us and smiled here and there although he could not understand a thing we were saying.

“My dreams,” I told him, “Maybe it has something to do with what happened to me.”

“You think someone was stopping you from breathing?”

I shrugged, “I don’t know. But I just couldn’t breathe. So dark, people screaming...”

He shook his head, “I can’t interpret dreams, but I believe that one day you will remember where you came from and what you had come here for.”

No matter how much I forced myself to remember, I couldn’t.

I searched my mind for answers but it just felt like a dark hole of nothingness.

The only connection I had if at all, to my past, was the strange dream.

A few weeks later, I had gained a substantial understanding of Toko village, with all its norms. Some sounded absurd and horrific, but slowly, I started seeing Toko through Yoke’s eyes. 

The village had strict rules and each day he told me about more things that were forbidden. He also told me that regardless of which rule a villager broke, there was only one punishment. 

Beheading.

The other time Yoke told me that no one was allowed to take any fruits and vegetables from the trees or farm for their own use. Everything was brought to the store hut, and from there, there were elders in charge of distributing food to the villagers according to their proportions every three days. Every family got just enough food to last them exactly three days.

All the males old enough worked on the farm at the crow of the rooster each morning. He told me that at eleven years old, a boy was already old enough and was expected to join his father on the farm.

“What about the girls?” I asked, twirling a piece of my hair around my finger.

“The girls are responsible for taking care of their mother and father's hut. They are supposed to clean, cook and fetch water every morning.” He said.

His eyes lingered on my hair. He seemed a little distracted by me twirling my hair.

“Like Gamu.” I stated, untangling my hair from my finger.

“Yes, but Gamu is a servant.

“If you do not have a child, your chores as a woman are yours alone. Unless you are the chieftess, like Furah.”

“Hm…” I nodded, taking it all in. “At this point, I need a notebook.” I chuckled.

“A woman who cannot conceive is considered punished by the Gods.”

Something flickered through my mind.

My hands.

They were holding a thick book.

I couldn't read the title, but…

“Punished for what?” I frowned.

It felt like this book was important.

But I didn’t know why or what it was about.

“Are you okay?” He looked concerned.

I smiled, shaking my head. “Yeah… just had some kind of… flashback? 

“I was holding a book.”

“Book?” He asked.

I shrugged it off. “Never mind. Go on.”

He watched me for a second, as if considering whether he should insist or let it go.

“...For a sin they might have committed in their youth. So, such women are ashamed and do not mix with the other woman.”

“What about Furah?”

“That's a different story.” Yoke said, looking away. He suddenly looked disinterested.

“How come?”

“One day I will tell you.

“For now... uh…”

“What?” I asked him.

“Your hair is so silky.” 

I scoffed. “Well, not really anymore.”

He looked a little nervous. “Can I try doing that thing you just did with it?”

“What thing?” I asked him.

“Can I…”

I nodded subtly, and waited for him to show me what he was referring to.

The moment his fingers touched my hair, my heartbeat quickened.

It wasn't the first time we'd held each other's gaze, but this time felt different.

I felt like he was looking deeper. And I was too.

He made a strand of my hair twirl around his fingers as he reached the edges.

I broke eye contact just as Uma spoke.

“Batu.”

Yoke withdrew his hand quickly.

“Is that what you wanted to try?” I chuckled. Tried. 

Because had he felt it too?

He nodded with a small frown. 

“Forgive me…” He grimaced.

“It's okay.” I tried to look indifferent.

“Uh… I see people on their way up the hill.” He motioned. “They can't see us talking for so long.”

I turned back to see a few ladies with buckets making their way towards the well.

I nodded at him, trying a smile.

He smiled back, and somehow his smile felt exactly like mine. And then turned quickly to leave.

“You forgot to get your water.” I pointed at his empty bucket.

“Oh, I don't need water.” He smiled nervously and said. “I have enough water from yesterday. I just came to…”

He shrugged lightly.

To what?

“Just to talk to you.” He told me. “It's just you are a little lonely sometimes since the others don't really understand you.”

I smiled up at him, this time genuine. He didn’t know how true his words were. 

“Thanks.”

He nodded and left with Uma.

On days when there were other people at the well, we only greeted and smiled at one another. And from time to time, we would catch each other's eyes. I would wait for Gamu to finish drawing water and then we would leave.

And as usual, on our way back to the hut, Gamu's mood would change instantly. And I noticed that Gamu's mood changed only if we met Yoké and Uma on that day. I wanted to ask her why that was, but I knew she wouldn't understand me, or if she replied I wouldn't understand her properly.