CHAPTER 14

  "Please give my son a reason to fight. Please, be the reason for him to fight."

  I felt like the world just stopped revolving, the clock stopped ticking, and someone dropped a bomb in front of me and it explodes right away. My mind stopped working as well, if that's even possible, everything is in a freeze. Mr. Fidel's words are the only thing that circulates in my mind and my surroundings as of the moment, it is the bomb that was dropped in front of me and immediately exploded, and here I am, still doesn't know what's happening.

  Did I hear it right? Did the father just ask me— no, did the father just begged me to give his son a reason to fight? And that reason is me? Did I hear it right or I was just imagining and hearing things on my own? Because honestly, I can't believe it if that's what exactly happened. I mean, hello? Usually, the father will threaten me to stay away from his son, especially if he doesn't like me, but the opposite happened, and I am too assuming if I think that he likes me for Dion. Oh gosh, Zhanaia, you dream so high!

  I looked at everyone at this table and they are looking at me with hope in their eyes, even my best friend! What is happening, really?

  Mr. Fidel holds my hand tightly, but it is not as tight that it will hurt. It is gentle, like a father holding his daughter tightly but gently like he is protecting his daughter or trying to convince her over something.

  "Think about it, Zhanaia. I won't force you if you don't want to do it, but still, please, think about it. You are our only hope now. You are the only chance for Dionysus."

  He gently smiled at me and caress the back of my hand with his thumb that is a bit rough, before he stood up, and left the table. I was left with Caroline, Francis, Daniel, and Janice. The third one stood up and looked at me, "Can we talk, privately?"

  I was surprised when she didn't use her bitchy tone to me while raising her eyebrows, like what she always do since I first saw her. Her voice sounds so sad and down. I felt Caroline nudged me, telling me to say 'yes' to Janice, so I hesitantly nodded my head and followed her when she started to walk away from the table. One of the things that bother me is, why does it seem like my best friend knows better than me what's going on? I tell her the things that are going on between me and Dion, but it seems like she knows more than I do.

  Janice brought me to an area where no one could hear and notice us. We were silently standing for a while before she sighed and looked at me.

  "Zhanaia, right?" I nodded. She looks up at the sky that is now dark. "I know that you do know that I am Dion's childhood best friend and first love."

  I fought the urge to raise my eyebrow, is it just me, or she really sounded arrogant and bragging that she was Dion's first— argh!

  "You know what Janice if you called me here just to brag and slap me with the fact that you are Dionysus' first whatever, spare me. I have more important things to think and to deal with than this."

  I don't know where did I get my courage to talk to her like that, with the same confidence as her when she's bitching around. Perhaps because of the sudden turn of events that are now starting to frustrate and take a toll on me? I don't know at all, but one thing I am sure of is, I have more important and serious things to deal with than her.

  She chuckled, almost mockingly. "Chill, girl. I didn't mean to sound arrogant and bragging. Well, it's the truth after all. And... I didn't know you're like that, opposite from the silent Zhanaia I've known for a short time I spend with you earlier. Or, it's just that, you don't want Dii seeing that side of you because he might be turned off and realize that you are not worthy of his feelings."

  For an unknown reason, I became short-tempered. I was about to explode when she continued, "But anyway, I didn't call you here to fight over that pretty lil thing. We both know you'll never win against me. After all, I am Dii's first love and childhood best friend. If you are going to look at it, I am the most important woman in his life next to his late mother."

  She just told me that she didn't call me here to fight over that thing, but, if she continues bragging and being a bitch, I ready to raise a World War III anytime. She's getting on my nerves!

  "Just go straight to the point, Janice."

  I saw how her face shone in shock with my impatience, so opposite of the Zhanaia she encountered the whole day. Well, who wouldn't lose someone's patience if you are facing someone like her? She chuckled, making me lose my temper more. I swear, if she would continue beating around the bush, I don't think I can still stop myself.

  "Geez. Okay!" again, she took another deep breath. "Actually, I called you here to ask the same favor that uncle Fidel asked you." she started.

  I looked at her with my brows furrowed, "What?"

  She smiled. "I saw how he looked at you, Zhanaia. I saw how he cared for you, I saw how he secretly took glances at you, and I saw how he looked at you with tenderness in his eyes, and like you are the most beautiful, precious, and important thing in the whole universe. And of course, I saw how you made him calm down earlier with your gentle touches and whispers, a thing that only you can do to Dionysus."

  "Do you know that I can't make him calm down even just a little when we were still together and his headache attacks him? I can only be by his side to somehow support him but I can't make him calm down."

  "To be honest, I don't like you, you know. Well, who would like the person whom the person I love loves?" I remained silent while listening to her. "But although I don't like you, I have to admit the fact and accept my defeat. You are our only chance now, you are Dii's last and only chance. Just like what uncle Fidel said, you can be the reason for him to fight, we all know that with just a word, he would do everything he can just to fight and spend a lifetime with you, Zhanaia. Just like how he was ready to do everything to survive for me back then, but... I left him. I left him when he needed me the most."

  Her voice suddenly became sad as she looks down, regret was written on her face. Probably regretting that she left Dion because she's scared and she lacks faith in him.

  "Zhanaia, I regret leaving Dionysus," she said. "And perhaps what the old saying is right, that 'Regret and realization are always at the end'. That's why I am here to talk to you, to tell you that do what you think is right as long as you still have time or else you'll regret everything in the end. If you are afraid of the possibilities and the tragedies, don't let them overcome you like what it did to me. I swear, Zhanaia, slowly, your what-ifs will haunt you down someday. And as much as I don't want you for Dion, and if I can only bring back the old us, I can't. All I can do now is to regret everything, regret my cowardice, regret being a useless best friend, and lover of Dionysus. And to somehow ease this feeling I am having, I want to do something to make you realize things so you wouldn't end up like me, and so that you can do something for Dion. I know that you feel the same way as him and you are just somehow afraid to admit it, but I wish that you would have the courage to finally accept what you feel. That way, you and Dionysus wouldn't have a hard time suppressing your feelings for each other and you could both be happy while fighting together. I may not like you because, yes, I admit that I am jealous. I wish Dion could still look at me the way he did to you, but yea, the truth hurts. We are never the same anymore. And I know that you are a good person and that my best friend is in the hand of the right person. I may be a bitch but you have my support, Zhanaia. Please think about my words, and I hope we could be friends."

  She smiled at me gently, making me smile back. Somehow, I felt a light feeling enveloping me. She stretched her right arm at me while smiling and said,

  "A handshake as a sign of acquittance?"

  I chuckled and accepted her hand. "Acquittance, huh?" 

  We shared a soft smile before she let go of my hand and excused herself, I was about to walk too when I heard someone faked a cough from my back. I turned around to see who it was and saw Daniel looking at me with a small smile on his face.

  "Oh, Daniel. Hi!" I greeted.

  I was expecting him to nod his head and walk past him like he always does but to my surprise, he spoke.

  "So, I see you are doing good with Janice." he beamed, making me shake my head.

  "No, not really. We are not on good terms at first, you know. It is like, there is an imaginary wall between us."

  He nodded. "Yea, Stell and I saw that while following you all from afar. Janice was just trying to piss you off, and yes because she's somehow jealous of you. But she's a good person too, Zhanaia. It's just that, she's a bitch but good to those people who are close to her."

  I nodded. "So, ahm, why are you here?" I asked.

  "I'm here to ask you the same favor that señor Fidel asked you."

  My brows met, he's now the third person to ask me with the same favor. And looks like I am about to hear another story from a different point of view that is connected to Dion. This time, I am going to hear Daniel's point of view.

  "Well, I am sure that Janice already told you that Dion needs only a word from you, and he'll do everything he can, will give everything he has just to fight so that he could stay with you. And I know too that Janice already asked you the same thing, and that she already gave you advice, and told you about how she left Dion when he needed her the most."

  "So, I am just here to uhh... what do we call this, just to give you another word of wisdom?" he joked and we both chuckled. "No, this is just to make your mind clearer, I hope."

  "We all know that you and Dion share the same feeling. He already confessed to you but you... we can see that you are still afraid to admit your feelings, and you are wondering how it happened that you two feel something for each other in a matter of short time. But you know, Zhanaia, you don't have to spend a long time to tell if you love the person or not. You will feel it. It's just that, some things bother you, making you confused about your feelings. But think about it thoroughly, okay? You have our support."

  For the second time today, I heard someone giving me support. It warms your heart when you know that someone is there to support you, you'll have more courage to think and do things because you know there are people who are there to support you and guide you in every decision. I smiled.

  "Thank you, Daniel."

  He smiled back, "No worries, Zhanaia. We all know you are a good person and that Dion is in a good person."

  He tapped my back before he excused himself. I sighed in contentment and started to walk back to the restaurant, but before I could even reach the entrance, Caroline and Francis were already waiting for me outside. My best friend waved her hand at me before she runs towards me, Francis following him.

  "Zhanaia!"

  She hugged me like we've never seen each other for a long time. "Hey,"

  "OMG! You have the crown now. Imagine, the father was the one who talks to you and asked you a favor, he even gave you the blessing without you asking for it. Gosh, Zha, you're the one!" she exclaimed, making me smile.

  "It's because we all know that my cousin is in the right person." Francis erupted, making me look at him, still with a smile. "I know that Janice and Daniel already talked to you, so," he shrugged. "I'll just tell you that just like them, you have my support, Zhanaia. You have our support. Right, babe?"

  He encircled his arms around Caroline's shoulder, making my best friend give him dagger looks and if only looks could cut, I'm sure Francis' arm was already cut into half. He grinned, probably trying to piss Caroline off before he takes off his arm away from her shoulder. He winked at me,

  "See you tomorrow, Zhanaia. And see you in my dreams, my only babe." he winked at Caroline and gave her a flying kiss before he walks away, leaving me chuckling with my pissed best friend.

  "Gross," she mumbles and rolled her eyes in annoyance.

  I suppressed the teasing smile that wants to form in my mouth. It's not good to mess up with Caroline when she's this annoyed with someone even if you are her best friend or even her mother. Hell will break loose if you mess with her current mood. She's probably annoyed not to anyone but herself because someone like Dion can get into her like that and make her feel very annoyed and ruin her mood.

  I let her calm herself down for a while, it didn't take long when I heard her mumbling things to herself, probably encouraging herself to calm down. She took a deep breath a few times before she finally sighed.

  "Let's go," she said.

  We walk silently for a while, side by side before she spoke and broke the silence surrounding us.

  "So, how did it go?"

  "How did it go what?"

  "Your talk with Daniel and Janice."

  "Oh, so, you know."

  I suddenly remembered that she seems to know more than I do and the fact that she knew we are going to meet Mr. Fidel when she pulled me and told me to just follow her. And Caroline being my best friend, know me too well. She knows that I am just waiting for her to talk and explain, tell me what's happening. So she stops walking and faced me.

  "Zha, just like what Mr. Fidel said to you, he has been watching Dion from afar, ever since he came here in Switzerland, and yeps, he has been watching you two, so he saw everything. And then the day I met Francis and Janice was the day I met Mr. Fidel too. He talked to me about this, and asked for my help too."

  "And you offered them help."

  It wasn't a question but a statement because what's the use of asking? I already know.

  She nodded. "Yes, because just like them, I can see that you two shared the same feeling. It's just that, you are still afraid to admit it. Tell me, my best friend, what frightens you to face what you feel for him?"

  We stop walking, I didn't expect her to ask me that question. I know deep inside me that it's not just about feeling something for Dion for a short period, there's more. I know deep inside me that I fear something, something that hinders me to face what I feel.

  "Tell me, Zhanaia. What fears you and what stops you to give what you feel a chance?"

  If I give this feeling a chance, there's a lot of things that may happen. There's a lot of possible outcomes, and there are also negative ones. There are things that may happen unexpectedly, unexpected events are inevitable. There can be unexpected extreme happiness and an unexpected tragedy.

  Dion is in the worst state, they may not say it but I know it's happening.

  He is dying.

  I would be risking something in this one.

  What would happen if I give this feeling a chance?

  Would I take the risk for this love that is in the condition between life and death?

MICS ARTEMIA