Mag-log inSnow always looks romantic until you are standing in it with a suitcase, a rapidly numbing nose, and the growing suspicion that the universe is laughing at you.
It started gently, almost politely. Small flakes drifting down like they were testing the atmosphere before committing. Pretty. Harmless. The kind of snow you admired from indoors while holding something warm.
This was not that.
Within minutes, the air thickened. What had started as gentle, almost decorative flakes quickly multiplied, crowding the space between sky and ground until everything felt slightly blurred at the edges. Visibility shrank in real time, streetlights dissolving into glowing halos, the world narrowing to movement and sound and cold.
The taxi stand erupted into restless energy.
People shifted from foot to foot, dragging suitcases closer, shoulders hunching as coats were pulled tighter. Voices rose in pitch and volume, irritation bubbling just beneath politeness. Someone complained loudly about delays. Someone else argued into their phone, pacing in a tight circle like motion might fix the weather.
I hugged my coat closer and tipped my head back, staring up at the sky as though it might explain itself. As though the clouds might pause and say, Sorry about this, just a misunderstanding.
They did not.
“So,” Julien said beside me, his voice calm in a way that felt deeply unfair under the circumstances. “Looks like the weather has opinions.”
I snorted softly. “It waited until we landed. Very considerate timing.”
He smiled faintly, the corner of his mouth lifting as snow gathered in his dark hair. Somehow, he looked like someone who handled situations like this regularly. Unbothered. Grounded. Like mild chaos was just another item on his mental checklist.
Lucas, meanwhile, bounced enthusiastically on his toes, eyes bright as he watched the snow swirl around us. He looked like he had personally ordered it.
“Snow means hot chocolate,” he announced with absolute certainty.
Julien glanced down at him. “Eventually,” he said, tone indulgent.
Lucas accepted this with a nod, clearly satisfied that his priorities had been acknowledged.
I pulled my phone from my pocket, fingers already cold, and checked the screen. The signal flickered uncertainly. Notifications lagged, loading with painful slowness. I refreshed my hotel booking once. Then again. And again.
The confirmation stared back at me, unchanged.
Good. Still there. Still real.
I told myself I was only checking because of the snow. Because it was sensible. Not because I suddenly needed reassurance that I still had a destination. That I still had a plan.
A taxi finally rolled forward, tyres crunching through slush, headlights cutting weakly through the falling snow. Relief washed over the small crowd as it stopped, like we had all collectively agreed this one vehicle was a minor miracle.
Julien stepped forward without hesitation, opening the door and ushering Lucas inside with practised ease. He adjusted Lucas’s scarf, tugged his hat down properly, then closed the door before snow could sneak in.
He turned back to me, snowflakes catching in his lashes.
“Are you staying nearby?” he asked.
The question landed heavier than it should have.
I hesitated for half a second. Pride wrestled with practicality, and for once, practicality won decisively.
“Same general direction,” I said.
It was vague. Technically true. And absolutely intentional.
Julien nodded immediately, like the answer required no further explanation. “Get in,” he said. “We can drop you off.”
I didn’t argue.
I stepped into the warmth of the taxi, snow melting off my coat, the door closing behind me with a final thud that felt suspiciously like commitment.
The inside of the taxi was warm. Blessedly, mercifully warm. The kind of warmth that made your shoulders loosen without permission and reminded you just how cold you had actually been. I slid into the seat beside Lucas, my coat brushing against his as I settled in.
He leaned over immediately, pressing his nose close to the window, eyes wide. “Look,” he said, pointing excitedly. “It’s sticking.”
I followed his finger to where snow clung stubbornly to the glass, gathering in uneven clusters like it had every intention of staying. Lucas watched it with reverence, as if this were a once-in-a-lifetime event instead of weather.
“It’s very impressive,” I said solemnly.
Satisfied, he leaned back, still watching the world outside like it was unfolding just for him.
The taxi pulled away from the curb, tyres crunching softly against the forming slush. The sound was oddly soothing, steady and rhythmic, grounding in a way I hadn’t expected.
France slid past the windows in blurred lights and streaks of white. Streetlamps cast a warm glow over sidewalks already dusted with snow, shop windows glittered with holiday decorations, and cars crawled along carefully, horns sounding in impatient bursts. Festive and chaotic all at once. Beautiful, in a way that felt slightly mocking.
This was exactly the kind of scene people romanticised. Winter in France. Snowfall. Warm lights against the dark.
I folded my hands in my lap and told myself not to overthink it.
Julien leaned forward and gave the driver an address.
Not a hotel.
I noticed immediately. Of course I did. My brain seized on it like it was vital information.
I told myself not to read into that. People lived in places. Addresses were normal. This meant nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
The ride settled into a quiet that felt comfortable rather than awkward. Lucas hummed softly to himself, a tuneless but content sound. Julien rested his elbow against the door, gaze fixed on the passing streets, thoughtful but calm. He looked like someone who knew exactly where he was going.
I watched the snow swirl outside, tracking individual flakes until my eyes blurred, and tried very hard not to imagine worst-case scenarios. Tried not to think about late nights, closed hotels, language barriers, or the fact that I was suddenly very aware of how far from home I was.
Then my phone buzzed in my hand.
The vibration was sharp and sudden, cutting through the quiet like a warning bell.
Relief surged instinctively as I glanced down. Good, I thought. Information. Solutions.
It evaporated instantly.
We regret to inform you that due to unforeseen circumstances, your reservation has been cancelled.
I stared at the screen.
Then I read it again.
And again.
Like repetition might soften the words. Like maybe they would rearrange themselves into something less final.
They did not.
My stomach dropped.
Cancelled.
Not delayed. Not adjusted. Cancelled.
The word felt heavy, definitive, like a door slamming shut somewhere in the distance.
I swallowed hard and lifted my gaze, suddenly hyper-aware of everything around me. How quiet the taxi was. How late it was getting. How the snow was still falling, thicker now, relentless.
And how very far from home I suddenly felt.
“Everything okay?” Julien asked gently.
The question was quiet, unassuming, but it landed with weight. I hesitated, phone still warm in my hand, the screen glowing far too brightly in the dim interior of the taxi. The truth sat heavily on my tongue, awkward and inconvenient and suddenly very real.
I glanced at the message once more, just to be certain it hadn’t changed its mind.
It had not.
“My hotel cancelled,” I said finally, forcing the words out with what I hoped passed for composure. “Apparently, snowstorms are unforeseen circumstances.”
Julien frowned immediately, the kind of frown that came from concern rather than confusion. “Do you have another place lined up?”
I let out a laugh before I could stop myself. It came out thinner than intended, brittle around the edges. “Not unless the streetlights are taking guests.”
The taxi seemed to grow quieter.
Lucas, however, reacted as if this were the most obvious problem in the world with the simplest solution. He gasped dramatically, hand flying to his chest.
“You can stay with us,” he declared.
Julien blinked. Once. Then again. “Lucas.”
“What?” Lucas said, completely unbothered. “We have space.”
I felt heat rush to my face, sudden and intense. “Oh, no. I could never.”
The words came out quickly, reflexively. Polite refusal. Socially appropriate panic response. The kind of thing you said before someone had to reassure you, and everyone could pretend this was normal.
Julien did not reassure me immediately.
Instead, he thought.
I could see it in the way his expression shifted, eyes unfocusing slightly as his mind moved ahead, calculating. Practical. Calm. Decisive. Like someone used to assessing situations under pressure and choosing the least terrible option.
“It is late,” he said at last. “And the storm is getting worse. You can stay for the night. Just until things settle.”
Just for the night.
The phrase echoed in my head, loud and ominous.
Famous last words.
I stared at him, heart suddenly thudding much harder than the situation warranted. Every instinct I had was waving red flags, reminding me that this was a terrible idea. A stranger. A foreign country. A snowstorm. A child who had already decided I belonged to him.
Every practical bone in my body, however, was screaming that this was the only reasonable option.
I weighed the alternatives. Wandering snowy streets with a suitcase. Hoping another hotel might miraculously materialise. Sleeping in a taxi, perhaps.
I sighed.
“Are you sure?” I asked because it felt important to give him one last chance to retract the offer.
Julien nodded without hesitation. “Of course.”
Lucas grinned as he had just orchestrated a master plan, his shoulders lifting with barely contained pride.
The taxi slowed, tyres crunching through fresh snow, then came to a stop.
“This is us,” Julien said.
I stepped out into the cold, my boots sinking slightly as they met the snow-covered ground. The air bit sharply at my cheeks, breath puffing white in front of me. I looked up.
The house stood warmly lit, glowing against the dark like something pulled from a storybook. Windows shone softly. A porch light cut through the falling snow, illuminating the path to the door.
It looked inviting in a way that felt unreal.
Too warm. Too safe. Too significant for something that was supposed to be temporary.
I swallowed, nerves and disbelief tangling in my chest.
And followed them inside.
“Well,” I said lightly, because humour was my coping mechanism. “This is how horror movies start.”
Julien laughed softly. “We promise not to bite,” he teased.
Subconsciously, I let out an awkward chuckle, followed by a quick wave of regret.
What was I doing?
Lucas grabbed my hand without asking and tugged me toward the door.
And just like that, my carefully planned solitude vanished into the snow.
He stopped coming to bed at the same time as me.It happened so gradually that I couldn't have said which night it started. First it was twenty minutes, a last email, a call to Dubois that ran over. Then an hour. Then I began waking at two in the morning to find the other side of the bed cool and flat, and a line of light under the study door at the end of the hall.I didn't go in. I stood outside it once, my hand almost on the handle, and heard the soft, repetitive sound of pages turning, and went back to bed.***By February, the weekends with Camille had settled into a pattern that everyone could survive. She arrived at ten. She and Lucas spent the day together, in the garden when the weather allowed, at the kitchen table when it didn't, with either Julien or me hovering within earshot like a lifeguard at a pool. She left at five. Théo waited in the car at the end of the lane and never once came to the door.It was going well. That was the maddening part. Lucas adored her. Camille
The letter arrived on a Thursday, in a thick cream envelope with a law firm's name embossed across the top corner, and Julien read it standing at the hall table with his coat still on.I knew before he said anything. I watched his face do what it did when something landed that he'd been half expecting and had hoped, with some stubborn and private part of himself, would simply never be posted."Camille's lawyer," he said, and held it out.It was three pages of careful, courteous French. It expressed the client's sincere gratitude for Monsieur Castellan's cooperation to date. It acknowledged the extraordinary circumstances. It then proposed, in a series of numbered paragraphs, a formal arrangement: alternating weekends, overnight stays, a share of the school holidays, and a hearing before the family judge in six weeks should the parties be unable to agree.I read it twice. The courtesy of it was almost the worst part. Nothing in it was a demand. Everything in it was a polite inevitabili
It was Camille who asked to see the estate.She asked on a Saturday in January, standing in the kitchen with her coat still on, in the tone of someone requesting something small that she'd been rehearsing for days. She wanted to see where Lucas would grow up, she said. Where his name was going to be one day. She wanted to understand it, so that when he talked about it, she would know what he was talking about.It was a reasonable thing to ask. That was the difficulty with most of what Camille asked. Each request, taken alone, was reasonable, and Julien, who had spent four years believing he owed her a funeral and was now discovering he owed her something else entirely, found it very hard to refuse reasonable things."Théo would like to come as well," she added, almost as an afterthought. "If that's alright. He has always loved vineyards."I watched Julien's shoulders register that, a small, controlled tightening."Of course," he said.***Domaine Castellan in winter looked like a plac
Julien told her on a Sunday, over the phone, the same careful, unhurried way he told most difficult things. He didn't share the details of the call with me afterward beyond the fact of it, that it was done, that Camille now knew I existed and that she had, in his words, gone quiet on the line for a long moment before saying only, "I see."She asked to meet Lucas the following weekend. She asked, separately, almost as an afterthought that wasn't really an afterthought at all, whether I would be there."I told her you would be," Julien said. "I didn't think it was fair to hide you from a room I was asking you to sit in.""Good," I said, and meant it, though I spent most of that week discovering new and inventive ways to feel nauseous about a Saturday afternoon.***She arrived alone. Théo, apparently, had agreed to wait at the hotel, a small mercy I hadn't expected and wasn't sure how to interpret. She stood on the doorstep in a coat that looked expensive in the understated way expensiv
"Come with me," Julien said, three days after the hallway conversation, over coffee he hadn't touched. "Not into the room. I'm not ready for that yet. But close by. I don't want to do this entirely alone again."I understood the difference he was drawing, careful as everything he did, and I didn't push against the shape of it. Some door still wasn't mine to walk through first. But waiting somewhere near it, that much he was ready to let me do.The café Camille had chosen sat on a corner near Beaune's old market square, the kind of place with steamed windows and a view of the street that made it easy to watch without being watched in return. Julien went in. I took a table at the café directly opposite, ordered something I had no intention of finishing, and angled myself so I could see through the glass without staring too obviously at the two figures already seated at a corner table inside.There were three of them.I hadn't expected that. Julien hadn't mentioned it either, which meant
Lucas didn't know yet.Julien had decided that much within the first day, quietly and without much discussion, and I hadn't argued with him. There was no obvious right way to tell a seven-year-old that the mother he'd grieved, briefly and without much memory of her to grieve with, had never actually gone anywhere permanent at all. So the house carried on as though nothing had shifted beneath it, breakfast and school and an ongoing debate about whether a dog could be reasonably requested for a birthday still four months away, while upstairs and down, two adults moved through the days like they were carrying something breakable they couldn't set down.I passed the photograph in the hallway more than usual that week. I don't think I meant to. It seemed to catch my eye now in a way it never quite had before, the frame slightly crooked on its hook, Lucas laughing on a pair of shoulders that ended abruptly at the edge of the picture, the tear along the border rougher than a clean crop shoul
I woke up with a plan. It was not a complicated plan. It did not require equipment or significant preparation. It required only that I be a normal, functioning adult woman who was capable of making her interest in another person reasonably clear without embarrassing herself.I had done thi
Lucas fell asleep on the sofa at half past seven.He had been fighting it for twenty minutes, eyes going heavy then snapping open again with the determined focus of someone who believed sleep was something that happened to other people. He was still holding his book when it finally won. The anglerf
The house received us the way warm houses always do after a long time in the cold.All at once.The heat hit my face the moment Julien pushed the door open and stepped aside to let me through. Behind me I could hear Lucas stomping his boots on the mat with a thoroughness that suggested he had been
The cold outside felt different from the cold of the night before.Last night the air had been sharp and hostile, a biting wind that pushed through coats and scarves and made every step toward the house feel like a small victory. This morning the cold had softened into something quieter, t







