No one ever said revealing my past for the first time would feel like a heavenly blessing but John didn't warn me that it may feel like hellfire has unleashed upon me. My emotions were at the edge and a pounding ache rose up in my chest, and yelled loudly towards the heavenwards, "Ahhhhhhhhh!!" "Mommmmmm!" "Daddddddd!!" My haunting voice echoed in the entire apartment, as I sobbed my heart out letting out the anguish I have been holding back for all these years. It's nothing to the rage building within me, wanting justice of the hidden crimes commited in the mystifying dark of that unpleasant night. The thunderstorm outside was nothing as compared to the cyclone that was running inside my nerves. The sound of the clock striking past midnight was all I could hear apart from my heavy breathing. My body ached but the physical pain didn't matched the emotional turmoil that I was undergoing in that split moment. I never wanted to be in this place, but here I went down on my knees; ext
There's a moment when everything appears to be plain and there's a day when it's a mess filled with pity and symp[athy of what has happened; the trauma of the past hovers over and over again and there's nothing left to be said or done for the inevitable has taken place. I knew I was contained in my grief, but this overwheming sorrow could turn into a murderous attempt, this I've never given it a thought, but as I came to my senses, the first thing I did was to whisper her name, "Serena." It wasn't Carolina whom I was ready to kill, my mind has conjured up her image in this poignant state where I couldn't differentiate between the right and wrong but I only it had to end. "Serena!" I called again with remorse caging me that I lost control over myself and allowed myself to be taken away by the demons of the girl who scarred me to the point where I saw nothing but maddening need to revenge. I was ashamed but it was a partia;l feeling; the consta
FlashbackIt was the last day of Serena's internship in the Rogers, and today finally she was going to be awarded the certificate of excellence from the team. In past few days, or more like I should say since the night I have spilled Carolina's name from my tongue, we have drifted apart a great deal. We were no longer a couple who's lives revolved around their love.Surely, we did live together but our relationship was going down the drain in a way that even if I wanted, I wasn't able to stop that unwanted thing. My insecurities were all over the place, and I don't even remember when was the last time I have paid attention to her. The delusion of the storm has overpwered my senses and all, I saw was the bad blood coming from our mouths over the other and the cause was the chaos of the dead. She was busy in her work while I purposely kept myself busy in my work. I loved her, but yet I wasn't a man enough to explain her my fears; while she thought that as my manly pride but only if she
I walked into the tunnel of seclusion, darker than charcoal, deeper than the rabbits hole and if I sensed that enormous feeling then it was horrific than a haunted house. Yet, I kept ambling, unaware of my final destination or a blueprint of life. I couldn't spot a thing at first while I felt my throat being dry but there was no pain inside me like my body was used to since years. It felt as if I was granted purgatory in the most wildest sense. It made sense only to me and to no one else for it was my solitary hole to crumble or repair on my own. But then suddenly a flash of light fell on my face blinding my vision. I stepped closer to the light and a big smile came on my lips.There stood my family of five. I ran towards them to hug them, but they seem to be so far, yet so close."Mom!" I cried trying to reach out to her but she was shaking her head in denial. I couldn't comprehend the reason of this denial."I miss you, Dad. Mom, I want to be with you all. Don't leave me. Take me w
Six months!! That's how long I have been in an induced coma. The news came as a shocker in the morning when I was conscious enough to understand the happenings around me. It still felt like it was just yesterday, when I was fighting with my demons to find my peace; and now my mind was out of any stress. I just felt blank, like a weight has been lifted off forever. The last thing I remembered was coming to the conclusion about allowing Serena to live her life before I had fallen asleep. She must have been here while I was out in the space conquering my battles and now, I can tell her that she's free to leave. I will no longer be a pain in the ass and she can visit Nathan whenever she wants. From what John informed me, I had internal bleeding, and it became unstoppable. To avoid further damage to my body, the doctors thought it safe to put me in temporary unconscious state, till my mind became stable enough to deal with the stress. They wanted me to rest well so that the seeds of depr
In the last four days, I've read Serena's letter a four thousand times and everytime, I read the scribbling, a shockwave runs through my body. It leaves me paralyzed and maybe, even betrayed. Yes, I wanted her gone far away but not when I was in my deathbed. I'd only this hunch in my comatose state that she'd forsaken me, I hadn't expected it to be my physical reality. As much as it relieved me of her safety, it angered me that she had even left Nathan. The child didn't had to go through the pain of loosing his mother once more. Did she really reach at the edge of her breakdown to cast us aside like our lives weren't dependent on her? She had ordered me to find a better half when she was all I ever crushed and even loved. and I was the only man she'd kissed in her first meet and drove to a police station, and spent the most enchanting hours of her life. Even if they don't make practical sense, it was like a scene from one of those romance movies she watched and visualized for it to ha
Acceptance of who we are and from where we come makes us into the person we're destined to be. Knowing Serena enough, I know she has confined herself into the loop of Rodriguez sins believing herself to be one of them. If not, then her excuse to leave me wouldn't have been Carolina's relationship with her but my wild attitude with her. I'm considering it a punishment on her part to make amends for the damage on behalf of her not-so-mindful sister and biological mother. There's a beauty in a woman's love but there's a curse when that women is broken from her existence. I have awakened enlightened or maybe, it's the dream I had of my family which has given me a new perspective but the gravity of her disappearance still lurks in the shadows of her family doings. I have thought and thought the entire night, and as much I admire her bravery, I despise the loathing she's developed. Truth has the power to affect the strongest of us, and it has definitely, caused a shift in Serena to the line
"There's a lot of history circulating your friend and at the moment or ever I've no intention of clarifying it, so please call Serena now unless you've also changed your name to she-devil," ordering her, I gave her another smirk, and sat on the couch, straightening my feet on the coffee table. Clearly, my attitude can piss anyone off and that's what I wanted to do now. "You can't talk to me like that. I'll call the cops." She threatened. "If you call the cops then as much as I'd hate to do this I'll have to disclose them Serena's relationship to Carolina. I will file a case on Serena's mother and lead her into a mess that both the mighty ladies won't be able to clear. One question would lead to another and my deceitful love and mother of my son will find herself in serious identity crisis and even murder attempt at me for she left me at the wrong time." When it came to playing hard, Serena won the game but when it came to leading the huntress in the open dessert, I became the apex p