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What We Pretended To Be
What We Pretended To Be
Author: Tear stained lore

Chapter 1

last update publish date: 2026-03-13 06:27:45

The first lie I ever told about Daniel Rothfield was that I loved him.

At the time, it didn’t feel like much of a lie. More like a convenient sentence. Something simple enough to say out loud without anyone asking too many questions.

I already had a boyfriend.

Daniel needed a girlfriend.

And pretending, at least in theory, sounded easier than surviving our families’ expectations.

That night began with my mother reminding me—three separate times—that the Walker name used to matter in this city.

Not in an angry way. My mother rarely raised her voice. She had perfected that soft, careful tone that made everything sound polite and slightly disappointed at the same time.

The Rothfield Foundation gala was being held in a ballroom so bright it almost hurt to look directly at the chandeliers. Crystal. Marble. Waiters moving through the crowd like they’d rehearsed every step.

Somewhere near the stage, a jazz band played something slow and expensive sounding.

People laughed the way wealthy people do at events like this—measured, just loud enough to show they were enjoying themselves.

Every few minutes someone approached my mother with the same question disguised in slightly different wording.

Is Maria seeing anyone?

Anyone serious?

Anyone suitable?

I escaped to the tall windows lining the far wall, mostly so I could breathe for a second without someone analyzing my relationship status like it was a business investment.

My phone buzzed inside my clutch.

Mother: Darling, where are you? The Rothfields were asking about you earlier.

I stared at the message for a moment and slid the phone back inside the bag without replying.

Across the room, my father was speaking with three men in dark suits. His posture was perfectly relaxed, but the smile on his face had that thin quality I recognized from years of watching him manage investors.

My parents moved through the room like diplomats tonight.

Friendly. Composed.

Quietly reminding people that the Walker family still belonged here.

Even if the numbers in our accounts weren’t quite what they had been a few years ago.

I took a glass of champagne from a passing tray and turned back toward the window.

“Careful.”

The voice came from my right.

Low. Calm. Familiar in a way that made my attention snap sideways before I had time to think about it.

I turned.

And he did too.

For a second neither of us said anything.

Daniel Rothfield looked almost exactly the way I remembered him—and somehow completely different.

The boy I knew had always seemed slightly too serious for the games everyone else played at his parents’ summer parties.

The man standing in front of me now had the same stillness, just sharpened.

Taller. Suit perfectly cut. The kind of quiet composure that made people step out of his way without realizing they were doing it.

But his eyes—

Those hadn’t changed.

And when recognition flickered across his face, quick but unmistakable, something strange settled in my chest.

“Maria Walker,” he said.

Not surprised.

Just… certain.

“Daniel Rothfield.”

The corner of his mouth lifted slightly, like a private acknowledgment that time had done something strange to both of us.

“I didn’t expect to see you here,” I said.

“Your parents are major donors to the foundation,” he replied. “It would have been strange if you weren’t.”

Fair.

I laughed under my breath.

There it was—the version of Daniel Rothfield everyone talked about.

Controlled. Direct. Impossible to read.

Nothing like the boy who used to stand behind me at the swing set during his parents’ garden parties, pushing me higher every time I yelled higher like I was trying to launch myself into the sky.

I could still remember the smell of grass on those afternoons. Sunlight through the trees. My shoes scuffed with dirt.

And the way Daniel rarely joined the other kids. He just watched, quiet and observant, like he was always thinking about something the rest of us hadn’t noticed yet.

Then one year their invitations stopped coming.

My father’s investments had begun unraveling around the same time.

Even at sixteen, I understood enough about adult pride to know those two things weren’t unrelated.

We never spoke again after that.

“You’ve changed,” I said before I could stop myself.

Daniel’s expression barely shifted.

“Most people do.”

His voice wasn’t unfriendly.

But it wasn’t warm either.

Across the room, a ripple of attention moved through the crowd near the entrance.

Someone whispered his name.

Daniel Rothfield.

The most eligible man in the city.

I followed the direction of the whispers and watched a few people subtly adjust their posture as they noticed him standing beside me.

Daniel glanced toward the movement once, uninterested.

Then he looked back at me.

“You look exactly the same,” he said.

That caught me off guard.

“Is that supposed to be flattering?”

“It’s an observation.”

I smiled despite myself.

Something about the exchange loosened the tight feeling that had been sitting in my shoulders all evening.

But when I looked past him again, I noticed my mother watching us.

Not casually.

With focus.

And a few steps behind her, Daniel’s father had turned in our direction too.

Daniel must have noticed at the same time, because something sharpened quietly in his gaze.

“You look like someone who’s about to be interrogated by their family,” he said.

I rubbed my forehead lightly.

“You have no idea.”

“Actually,” he said, glancing across the room at his parents, “I think I do.”

We stood there for a moment without speaking.

Two people who had once spent entire afternoons in the same backyard.

Now standing in the middle of a ballroom full of expectations neither of us seemed particularly interested in meeting.

Then I noticed movement again.

My parents were making their way toward us through the crowd.

Daniel’s parents too.

Slowly. Deliberately.

And judging by the look on my mother’s face, she had already decided something about this situation.

Something involving the two of us.

I took a sip of champagne and looked at Daniel.

“Tell me,” I murmured, “do your parents enjoy arranging your future in public settings?”

A faint shadow of amusement crossed his face.

“Constantly.”

Great.

Because judging by the speed our families were approaching—

This night was about to become much more complicated.

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  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 102

    Maria: I woke up before Daniel. The apartment was still quiet in that strange expensive way quiet feels in places this large — soft, controlled, like even the walls had been taught not to make noise before sunrise. For a few seconds I stayed in bed staring at the ceiling, trying not to replay the gala in my head. It didn’t work. Elena walking into the room. Daniel going still beside me. Arrangement. God. That word again. I pushed the blanket off and slipped out of bed carefully. Daniel barely moved, still asleep on his stomach, one arm stretched across my side of the mattress like his body hadn’t gotten the memo that things between us were currently strange. I looked at his hand for a second longer than necessary before leaving the room. The kitchen lights came on automatically when I walked in. I moved through the space on instinct more than thought — coffee for Daniel, tea for me, breakfast, something simple. Halfway through making his coffee I stopped. Actually stopped. Just sto

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 101

    Maria: By the time the gala finally began emptying out, my cheeks hurt from smiling and my heels had officially declared war on me. People were still stopping me on their way out to compliment the event — the flowers, the seating arrangement, the donations, the press turnout. I thanked them automatically, nodding through conversations while my brain lagged several seconds behind my body. The room still looked beautiful, warm gold lighting spilling across white tablecloths, waiters moving quietly between tables, string music soft enough to disappear beneath conversation. Weeks of planning sitting right in front of me, polished and successful. And somehow the only thing I could think about was Daniel going still. Not surprised. Still. My mother found me near the exit while I was thanking an elderly couple from one of Charles Rothfield’s foundations. The second they walked away she stepped closer. “Mari.” I looked at her immediately. “Mama.” She studied my face carefully, not dramatica

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 100

    Maria:Lily looked at me from across the room and I knew instantly that she had arrived at the same conclusion I had. Her hand lifted to her mouth. Mine followed a second later. Neither of us said a word. We did not need to. Some things settle between two people without language. They just arrive and sit there, whole and undeniable. Beside me, Daniel had gone completely still. That was what stayed with me — not Marcus, not Lily, not even the woman by the entrance. Daniel. I turned to him. “Daniel.” Nothing. He was looking straight ahead, fixed on the woman across the room with such complete focus that for one brief ugly second I could have vanished beside him and I do not think he would have noticed. I said his name again, lower this time. Still nothing. That was the part that hurt. Not loudly, not dramatically, just quietly enough to be worse. The man who noticed everything had noticed nothing. I took that in and put it exactly where it belonged. Before I could make the mistake of

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 99

    Maria: The first time I saw the blog, Lily sent it to me with one text. Do not read the comments. Which was a ridiculous thing to say to someone like me because of course I read the comments. I read all of them. Then I read the post again. Then the replies under it. Then the older posts. Then the other posts linked under those. By the end of the hour, I was deep enough into that ugly little corner of the internet to feel vaguely humiliated by myself. Whoever was behind it had made me their personal project. Not just gossip. Not just speculation. Me. Entire posts dedicated to dissecting my marriage, my face, my family, my intentions, my clothes. A running commentary on what kind of woman marries a man like Daniel Rothfield and what she must have had to do to get him there. The worst part was that none of it was even lazy. It was specific. Mean in that deliberate way that told me this was not casual cruelty. This was studied. “Even born into money, she still carries herself like

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 98

    Maria:Four months into marriage, I still measured time in numbers before I felt it anywhere else. Four months down. Eight left, give or take. The math came first, as automatic as breathing. It always had. Only now it arrived with less certainty than it used to. It no longer felt like a countdown. It felt like something I kept checking out of habit, even though the answer had stopped meaning what it used to.I pushed the thought aside by the time I got to lunch.Lily was already seated when I arrived, sunglasses on, drink in hand, looking suspiciously pleased with herself. Which, in Lily’s case, usually meant she was withholding information for sport.I sat down across from her and gave her a long look. “You’ve been impossible for months.”She lowered her sunglasses just enough to peer at me over the rim. “Hello to you too.”“No, actually, let’s start here.” I dropped my bag into the chair beside me. “You and Marcus. It has been months since I found out you were behaving like two unsu

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 97

    Maria:By the time we got home, the champagne had softened into that pleasant hazy kind of tired that made everything feel quieter than it was. The house was dark except for the low lights we had left on, warm and familiar in a way it had not been when I first moved in. Back then every room had felt too polished, too deliberate, too much like I was standing inside someone else’s life. Now there were books on the side table that belonged to me, one of my cardigans draped over the arm of the sofa, Daniel’s watch on the kitchen counter beside a mug I had left there that morning. Small things. Ordinary things. Enough to make the place feel lived in.We moved through the night easily. Shoes abandoned by the door, clothes traded for something softer, lights switched off one by one. By the time we got into bed I was too tired to think too hard about the fact that I curled into him without hesitation. I just did it. And Daniel, like this had become normal enough not to comment on, pulled me c

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 18

    Maria:“I don’t think I’m competing with him anymore.”It doesn’t sound dramatic.That’s what makes it worse.Noah says it like he’s stating something obvious. Something he’s already accepted.I try to respond.“That’s not—”The rest doesn’t come.Because I don’t know what I’m correcting.He doesn’

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 15

    Daniel: “Why wouldn’t I?” It comes out clean. Easy. Like it belongs there. Maria doesn’t answer right away. I can feel her eyes on the side of my face, searching for something I’m not ready to give. I keep my gaze fixed on the road, fingers steady on the wheel. It’s easier this way. If I look

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 6

    The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was my phone.The second was that something about it felt… aggressive.Notifications stacked across the screen, one over the other, like they’d been building up overnight with nowhere to go.Most of them were from Lily.Of course.I squinted, still half-a

  • What We Pretended To Be    Chapter 10

    Sleep doesn’t come.Not properly. Not the kind that settles into your bones and stays.I turn. Adjust the pillow. Flip it to the cold side like that might fix something. Check the time.2:14 a.m.Close my eyes.It’s quiet. Too quiet.And then—Do you want it to be?I open my eyes again.“Why would

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