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108

For him to have been friends with you, I know I'd have loved him too. She squeezed Derek's hand, the two of them falling into a moment of silence, before Derek squeezed her hand in return.

"What happened to Liam, and what happened to your father, those things were out of our control. They weren't our fault."

Ashlyn hesitated for a moment before nodding. That was something her and Lana had been working on during their last session. But hearing Derek mention it now, she felt a familiar pang in her chest, the battle of her heart versus her mind silently brewing.

It wasn't our fault, she repeated, as much for her own sake as for his.

"I've been living in this world of what if, dwelling on all the ways that I could have saved him while neglecting to live in the world I'm in right now. Sitting there amidst the wilting posies and tears at Liam's grave, I was finally able to forgive myself, and Liam, for what happened."

Derek turned to Ashlyn with a sad smile, the light in his eyes shini
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