Chapter 5

Aurora

Numbness takes over me when I sit in his car and gaze out at the emptiness presented in front of me. I've had a fair share of ups and downs in my life but nothing comes close to this, no man has ever touched me sexually other than the one sitting right next to me. I close my eyes to get rid of the horrific images playing in my head, if Michael wouldn’t have been there, I would have ended up being violated in the worst way possible and there’d be no one to believe me. In the last nine years, my social life has been as dry as the Sahara Desert, I haven’t had time for a boyfriend let alone a friend.

I don’t regret it though, I’d go through hell, if that meant I could keep my mother alive for just a few more minutes, oh my god! Panic grips me at the thought of my mother, even though she can’t move, she’d be worried about me not being there, tears spring into my eyes, ‘I can’t leave her alone’, I don’t want to. Its late and I know Amelia wouldn’t leave mom’s side until I return but I can’t will myself to not care or stop the panic that’s gripping me, I need to be there with her. I stare out of the window and realize he’s taking me to my house, I relax a bit at that, it shouldn’t surprise me but it does, I’ve caused so much pain to this man and yet, here he is saving my life and making me feel guilty of my decision all those years ago, if only he knew the truth. I can’t do it though, not now that he’s finally happy and living his best life, I can’t ruin his future. Because even though I’m sucker for Michael Calloway, I’m not selfish enough to turn him against the people he loves the most.

 The car stops right in front of my place and Michael gets out to open the door on my side. ‘Such a gentleman’ I think to myself, he was always like this, taking care of people around him, never expecting anything in return. So selfless. He opens the door and gives me his hand, I take it, not because I’m weak but because being near him fills we with this weird kind of safety. Safety that I’ve never had in any other man’s arms. We walk in silence to the front door of my home and I ring the bell, the lights in the living room are still on, which means Amelia didn’t leave, I sigh in relief.

Amelia opens the door and a soft gasp leaves her lips when she takes in my appearance, “What happened to you, my child” she says softly, concern marring her calm features. I shake my head “it’s nothing Amelia, I’m fine, you should go home, your husband must be worried” she doesn’t look convinced, that’s when her eyes land on Michael.

“Are you sure, you are going to be, okay?” she asks again, I know she wants to go home, but she wouldn’t if I asked her to stay, I can’t do that to her though. “Go Amelia, I am fine” I say a bit more firmly than before and she slowly nods, “okay, I’ll just get my bag”. I go inside my home and stand awkwardly in the middle of the room as I see Amelia leave, my gaze lands on Michael who hasn’t moved an inch from near the door. He’s observing his surrounds, ‘what does he think?’ My house doesn’t even compare to what he might own now, there isn’t even a television set for god’s sake! The walls are shedding its color, the flooring is faded, the one sofa I have, has multiple holes all over it and to add to my misery, the smell of antiseptic is even stronger than before.

If he is disgusted by my surroundings, he masks it perfectly, not giving anything away from his stern facial features. I clear my throat to end my embarrassment and speak, “You should come in” I say softly, he looks at me then, with his penetrating gaze, the grey in his eyes visibly darkening.

He shakes his head but doesn’t make a move to leave or speak, I don’t know how I’m supposed to react to him now that all is said and done. I fidget with the hem of his jacket, things were never this awkward between us, we had a lot to talk about before, now it seems like he wants nothing to with me.

I try again, “Do you want some water to drink?” he shakes his head again, like he’s at a loss of words, he continues to survey my living room and when his eyes land on the used oxygen cylinder, they narrow, like he can’t quite understand why it’s there. Then, he straightens and looks me dead in the eye, “You aren’t going back to that bar again” he states in his deep voice, like he has any power over what I do with my life. I wouldn’t have gone anyway, but I can’t lose a job that pays so well, because finding a new job right now would mean, taking a step or two back from my financial debacle, I cannot afford it.

He turns around to leave and panic grips me, the thought of never seeing him again makes me say my next words, “I can’t afford to lose this job, I need the money” he stills on his way, unmoving and unbreathing. It’s like the world freezes around us and nothing else matters in that moment, I stop breathing when he turns around and slightly tilts his head to the side. He then places a hand into his pant pocket and retrieves a card, he reaches me in two long strides and holds the business card in front of me, timidly, I take it out of his hand and our fingers brush.

A zap of electricity flows through my arm and goes straight to my core, I look up at him to see if he feels the same energy but his face is still a mask of indifference, other that the slight tick in his jaw, he gives nothing away and that angers me the most. “Call me tomorrow at 1pm if you need a job” he then turns and speed walks towards his car, not giving me a chance to respond. I stand there, on the front porch of my house, shocked and little confused because of his behavior, I look down at the business card he left me with. It has a phone number on it which, if my suspicion isn’t wrong, is Michael’s. I should be ecstatic that I’d finally be able to give up my job at the bar but I am not.

Because even though the offer is tempting, being anywhere near Michael Calloway can be dangerous in ways I can’t bring myself to admit, one weak moment and I might ruin any and every relation he has with them. A weak moment and I might give myself to him.