第2章

I remembered the first time I saw Vivian.

A few years earlier, Vivian was still the problem student who gave Derek constant headaches.

I'd heard him complain about her antics more than once.

She'd once run across the school field waving sparklers and screaming about freedom, nearly setting the lawn on fire.

She'd also once rushed to play hero without getting the full story first.

After Derek got a call from the police, we rushed to the station in the middle of the night to pick her up.

Vivian was tiny, huddled on a bench at the station.

The moment she saw us, her face lit up and she ran to Derek.

"Derek, you actually came!"

Derek shook his head, exasperated.

"That girl was just a bystander watching the commotion. Why would you hit her!"

Vivian lifted her chin, her eyes rimmed red.

"I thought she was the other woman! You know how much I hate homewreckers!"

Derek froze, a flash of guilt crossing his eyes.

I smoothed things over and drove Vivian back to her dorm.

It wasn't until we got home that Derek, who had been silent the entire drive, suddenly pulled me into his arms in the dark.

He buried his face in my shoulder and told me in a muffled voice that Vivian's father had cheated and her parents had divorced.

Her mother had killed herself by jumping off a building.

His voice cracked, and he held me tighter.

"Claire, we'll never get divorced, right?"

My heart softened. I patted his back.

"Right. We'll be together forever."

I had been such a fool.

The next day, I hired movers to pack up my things.

Workers streamed in and out, emptying the home we'd built together, piece by piece.

A sudden crash snapped me out of my daze.

The mover scrambled to apologize.

"I didn't realize the box was so heavy. It slipped right out of my hands.

"Want me to toss it?"

Train tickets and little gifts spilled across the floor.

Seven years of dating. Three years of marriage.

Heavy enough.

I thought of the debate competition where Derek and I first met. The topic was:

Is the foundation of lasting love similarity, or complementarity?

Derek was on the school debate team, and it showed. His delivery was polished, and his argument took an angle no one expected.

His side argued that similarity breeds connection, that similarity keeps two people in step.

They had our team on the ropes.

As the closing speaker, I kept my voice steady.

"Similarity is the past. Complementarity is the future. Similarity affirms who I am. Complementarity answers who we can become.

"We are so different, yet we choose each other. That is love at its bravest.

"Our position stands: the foundation of lasting love is complementarity."

We won, barely.

By all logic, our paths should never have crossed again. But Derek started showing up everywhere.

Sometimes he'd bring me snacks. Sometimes he'd invite me to watch him debate.

Sometimes he'd simply sit beside me and watch me study.

Finally, when he was rambling beside me yet again, I couldn't take it.

"Derek, don't you have anything better to do?

"You following me around like this is really annoying."

He went quiet for a long moment, his eyes wide and hopeful.

"I like you. I want to be with you. Is that so wrong?"

My ears rang. I fled from the hurt in his eyes.

For a while after that, he did as I wished and vanished from my life.

Until the night a drunk harassed me at the sports bar where I worked part-time near campus.

Derek appeared out of nowhere.

The warm, easygoing Derek I knew wore a vicious expression for the first time.

He drove his fist into the man again and again.

The drunk's friends started closing in, so I grabbed Derek's arm and we ran.

We zigzagged through alleys until we'd ducked into a safe corner, and only then did I remember to scold him.

Blood was running down his forehead, but his eyes were bright.

"I think what you said was right.

"The foundation of lasting love really is complementarity.

"I love your composure, your clarity, your caution.

"Claire, I like you."

My heart hammered against my ribs. I reached up and gently touched the gash on his temple.

The wound was deep and wide. The scar was still visible to this day.

I looked into his beaming eyes, and I said yes.

But seven years was all it took for everything to change.

"Toss it. It's nothing important."