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Chapter Twenty-Two: Something like peace
Last Updated:
2025-04-30 21:44:58
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When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty-three: A Promise Without Words
Sunlight spilled into the room, and the chatter of a few people outside reached my ears. My phone felt like a weight in my hand as I squinted at the screen. 11:15 AM. I couldn't believe I had slept that long. Stumbling out of bed, I dragged myself to the bathroom. My eyes were barely open, but I mechanically grabbed my toothbrush and squeezed out more toothpaste than necessary. I went through the motions, scrubbing absentmindedly. Once I finished, I groggily stumbled back out, my stomach growling in protest. I was starving.I made my way to the tiny kitchen, opening the cupboard and glancing at the sparse supplies. I hadn't cooked anything yet. Thank god Ava had fed me yesterday. I scratched my head, wondering what I should make. Honestly, I could barely think straight. Pasta, I decided. Simple enough. I threw on the loose tee and shorts I’d worn yesterday, tossing my nightwear into the laundry basket.As I enter the kitchen, I realized I didn’t even have tomato paste. I groaned. I re
Last Updated : 2025-05-01When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty Four: Just Another Day
As usual I woke up late and ended up spending the morning with Ava. We literally lived in each others house. We were running round the kitchen fixing a meal. Chatting away while the food almost burned.The kitchen smelled like garlic—and not in a good way.“I think it’s burning,” I leaned over the stove, trying not to choke on the bitter scent.Ava waved the wooden spoon like a weapon. “It’s not burning. It’s toasting.”“That’s literally the same thing.”“Nope. Toasted garlic sounds intentional.” Ava fanned the pan dramatically. “Burnt just makes me sound careless.”I laughed and stepping back, clutching my water bottle. “Okay, Chef. But if we both end up with food poisoning, I’m blaming you.”“You already do,” Ava muttered, tossing the onions in with the sizzling garlic. “Anyway. Let’s talk about what really matters.”“Which is?” I ask raising a brow“Jayden.”“Nope.....you're gonna burn down the kitchen because of juicy gossips."“Yup.”“Nope.”Ava turned with a sly grin. “Why are y
Last Updated : 2025-05-02When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty Five: Roads that lead to him
I closed the door behind me, then stood there for a second, just listening to the quiet. I hadn't even picked a bag I'd use yet. I didn't want the bag too big so he wouldn't think I was moving in—that would be embarrassing. I picked up my tote bag. Placed it on the bed half-open and empty, like it was waiting for me to figure out what I was doing.Honestly, I didn’t even know what to pack. It wasn’t like I was going on a trip. I mean, technically I was, but not really. I wasn’t visiting family or going for a weekend away with friends. I was going to Jayden’s. Just me. Just him.Finally.I sat on the edge of the bed and dragged the bag closer. I’d already tossed in a pair of lounge wear shorts earlier. Soft ones, black, nothing too fancy. Just enough to feel comfortable without looking like I tried too hard. I added a tank top to go with it. Then, after way too much hesitation, one pair of underwear. Just one. I don’t know why. Maybe I thought packing more would feel too… suggestive?
Last Updated : 2025-05-03When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty-Six: His to Claim
The moment I laid eyes on him, my heart felt like it wanted to leap out of my chest and run straight to him. He smiled and waved—everything inside me melted. Warmth spread low in my belly. When I finally reached him, he pulled me into a soft hug. It made everything worse. My whole body felt like a grenade waiting to explode.He took my hand, and we walked together toward the house.By the time we reached the gate, I was stunned. The building towered over anything I’d ever called home—especially my tiny studio. It was a story building with two thick pillars standing guard in front. The compound was neatly German-floored. I immediately fell in love with the place—I imagined kids running around. "Slow down Sharon you haven't graduated." I muttered silently.Inside, the sitting room was something out of a movie. A massive chandelier dangled in the middle of the room, casting soft light across everything. A wide, luxurious sofa stretched out in front of a huge TV—I couldn’t even guess t
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We had been lying on the same spot for a while, our breathing slowly steadying. I reached for my phone and tapped the screen. 6:30. My bones felt heavy—the sweet kind of heavy. Jayden stood up without a word and held out his hand. I let him pull me along, still quiet, my body still tingling. The bathroom lights were warm and golden, and the air was already damp with rising steam. He turned on the tap, tested the water, then looked back at me with that crooked smile I was starting to get used to. “Come on,” he said gently, like he’d been waiting for this all day. I stepped in with him, the tiled floor cool under my feet. We didn’t say much. He lathered soap in his hands and ran them over my shoulders like it was the most normal thing in the world. It felt... soft. Not rushed. Just us. I didn’t know where to look. This was my first time having someone else bathe me. I fought the urge to cover my chest with both hands—unsure what was allowed in this kind of tenderness. When he was d
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The ultrasound room smelled like antiseptic and something faintly metallic. The walls were white—too white, I kept starring at the walls like it was comforting.The doctor’s chair creaked slightly as he adjusted the monitor. His face was unreadable, a practiced mask of neutrality, like he had delivered this news a thousand times beforeWell it was supposed to be a good news, that's why he delivered it with a smile on his face.But to me, this wasn’t routine. This was life-changing.The gel was cold against my skin, but I barely felt it. My fingers dug into the edge of the examination table, I gripped it thightly till my knuckles turned white, my heartbeat so loud it drowned out everything else.“You okay?” The doctor’s voice was calm, maybe he had read my body language or saw how tightly I gripped the bed.I nodded slowly, even though nothing about this felt okay, I tried so hard to control the tears that were welling at the back of my eyes.The room was silent except for the steady
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"Who was that guy beside you?" I asked, smiling secretly."Who?" Bianca looked at me cluelessly."The one you were standing next to. Isn’t he your friend?""I don’t even know who you’re talking about. I was just standing there searching for you," she said, smiling."What guy are you talking about?" Bianca asked again, trying to understand."Let me show you."I turned her face toward him, subtly pointing at the guy in question. He stood there, looking uninterested—like he'd rather be anywhere but here Jayden, Biance barely spared him a glance"I don’t know who that is, madam. Focus on your assignments," she said, giving me a funny, judgmental look."Never mind," I responded and went back to my seat, still smiling.I had arrived at school early and was waiting for Bianca. Every time I called, she claimed she was almost there. When I turned to look behind the hall, I finally spotted her standing—but someone beside her immediately caught my attention.Thump... thump... thump... My heart p
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Time crawled. I checked my phone for the hundredth time. Bianca had disappeared, and the hall was nearly empty. I replayed everything that just happened in my head over and over again That perfect opportunity, did I blow it, maybe I should have said something else My heart wouldn’t stop it erratic beating. What did I say, should I have said something else? A million conversations ran through my head, each more cringe worthy than the last. Hey, I noticed you standing there looking like a Greek god, and I’d like to volunteer as tribute? No. That would have sounded too desperate. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk past you again? Absolutely not. No....no...no I groaned softly, gripping my pen so hard as if it was the reason for my frustrations. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me, But I enjoyed it, I didn't know I had it in me You go girl, I gave myself a high-five. I tried to continue writing my note but my thoughts kept derailing. What if
Last Updated : 2025-03-21
Latest chapter
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty-Seven: Lingering Ghost
We had been lying on the same spot for a while, our breathing slowly steadying. I reached for my phone and tapped the screen. 6:30. My bones felt heavy—the sweet kind of heavy. Jayden stood up without a word and held out his hand. I let him pull me along, still quiet, my body still tingling. The bathroom lights were warm and golden, and the air was already damp with rising steam. He turned on the tap, tested the water, then looked back at me with that crooked smile I was starting to get used to. “Come on,” he said gently, like he’d been waiting for this all day. I stepped in with him, the tiled floor cool under my feet. We didn’t say much. He lathered soap in his hands and ran them over my shoulders like it was the most normal thing in the world. It felt... soft. Not rushed. Just us. I didn’t know where to look. This was my first time having someone else bathe me. I fought the urge to cover my chest with both hands—unsure what was allowed in this kind of tenderness. When he was d
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty-Six: His to Claim
The moment I laid eyes on him, my heart felt like it wanted to leap out of my chest and run straight to him. He smiled and waved—everything inside me melted. Warmth spread low in my belly. When I finally reached him, he pulled me into a soft hug. It made everything worse. My whole body felt like a grenade waiting to explode.He took my hand, and we walked together toward the house.By the time we reached the gate, I was stunned. The building towered over anything I’d ever called home—especially my tiny studio. It was a story building with two thick pillars standing guard in front. The compound was neatly German-floored. I immediately fell in love with the place—I imagined kids running around. "Slow down Sharon you haven't graduated." I muttered silently.Inside, the sitting room was something out of a movie. A massive chandelier dangled in the middle of the room, casting soft light across everything. A wide, luxurious sofa stretched out in front of a huge TV—I couldn’t even guess t
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty Five: Roads that lead to him
I closed the door behind me, then stood there for a second, just listening to the quiet. I hadn't even picked a bag I'd use yet. I didn't want the bag too big so he wouldn't think I was moving in—that would be embarrassing. I picked up my tote bag. Placed it on the bed half-open and empty, like it was waiting for me to figure out what I was doing.Honestly, I didn’t even know what to pack. It wasn’t like I was going on a trip. I mean, technically I was, but not really. I wasn’t visiting family or going for a weekend away with friends. I was going to Jayden’s. Just me. Just him.Finally.I sat on the edge of the bed and dragged the bag closer. I’d already tossed in a pair of lounge wear shorts earlier. Soft ones, black, nothing too fancy. Just enough to feel comfortable without looking like I tried too hard. I added a tank top to go with it. Then, after way too much hesitation, one pair of underwear. Just one. I don’t know why. Maybe I thought packing more would feel too… suggestive?
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty Four: Just Another Day
As usual I woke up late and ended up spending the morning with Ava. We literally lived in each others house. We were running round the kitchen fixing a meal. Chatting away while the food almost burned.The kitchen smelled like garlic—and not in a good way.“I think it’s burning,” I leaned over the stove, trying not to choke on the bitter scent.Ava waved the wooden spoon like a weapon. “It’s not burning. It’s toasting.”“That’s literally the same thing.”“Nope. Toasted garlic sounds intentional.” Ava fanned the pan dramatically. “Burnt just makes me sound careless.”I laughed and stepping back, clutching my water bottle. “Okay, Chef. But if we both end up with food poisoning, I’m blaming you.”“You already do,” Ava muttered, tossing the onions in with the sizzling garlic. “Anyway. Let’s talk about what really matters.”“Which is?” I ask raising a brow“Jayden.”“Nope.....you're gonna burn down the kitchen because of juicy gossips."“Yup.”“Nope.”Ava turned with a sly grin. “Why are y
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty-three: A Promise Without Words
Sunlight spilled into the room, and the chatter of a few people outside reached my ears. My phone felt like a weight in my hand as I squinted at the screen. 11:15 AM. I couldn't believe I had slept that long. Stumbling out of bed, I dragged myself to the bathroom. My eyes were barely open, but I mechanically grabbed my toothbrush and squeezed out more toothpaste than necessary. I went through the motions, scrubbing absentmindedly. Once I finished, I groggily stumbled back out, my stomach growling in protest. I was starving.I made my way to the tiny kitchen, opening the cupboard and glancing at the sparse supplies. I hadn't cooked anything yet. Thank god Ava had fed me yesterday. I scratched my head, wondering what I should make. Honestly, I could barely think straight. Pasta, I decided. Simple enough. I threw on the loose tee and shorts I’d worn yesterday, tossing my nightwear into the laundry basket.As I enter the kitchen, I realized I didn’t even have tomato paste. I groaned. I re
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty-Two: Something like peace
After the rounds of pictures were done, I made sure I’d packed up everything. I wasn’t planning on stepping foot back into that school until the entire three-week break was over. Well… technically, it was two weeks now. The whole presentation thing already stole one week from our break, which was honestly just heartbreaking.I plugged in my earpiece, letting the music take over as I walked home. Every beat, every lyric—it felt like a soundtrack to my relief. Bianca stayed back at the dormitory. Too bad—we couldn’t walk home together. Natalie and I used to go home together but things had changed. I missed that already.The moment I got home, I stripped out of my clothes and slipped into a loose t-shirt and shorts. My feet barely hit the floor before I was already heading straight to Ava’s apartment. I was starving.Knock, knock.I paused at her door, waiting.“Come in,” she called from inside.I didn’t hesitate. I pushed the door open and made a run for the kitchenette.“What did you c
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty-one: Unexpected Turns
I left Jayden’s apartment early that morning, careful not to make a sound as we closed the door behind me. Felix was still knocked out on the couch, a blanket half-slipping off him. For a second, I almost turned back, almost crawled back into Jayden’s bed and pretended none of this real-world stuff existed. Jayden walked me to where I got a bus and we kissed good bye. He was going to his apartment where he stays with his cousin—his real apartmentThe seminar was coming up. And no amount of pretending was going to stop it. The days between then and Tuesday felt like a blur — half stress, half fatigued.I’d sit hunched over my phone for hours. Obsessing over every single PowerPoint slide. Changing fonts. Rewording bullet points. Adding animations, then deleting them because they felt “too much.”Ava, my neighbor and lowkey study buddy came over every evening, throwing questions at me until I wanted to scream. She was brutal in the best way — every awkward pause I made during practice, s
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Twenty: When The night Turns Soft
After the final exams on Friday, I spent the whole of Saturday sleeping—trying to revive my energy so I could function like a real human being again. By Sunday afternoon, around 1 p.m., I was sitting in the garage at the front of our building. It wasn’t really used for cars since none of us had one—we were all college students, so we’d converted the open garage space into a study and hangout area. The shed above gave just enough shade to make it bearable.I stared at the empty document on my phone, fingers hovering. Blank. I had no idea how to begin. As always, once I started, the words would pour in, but that beginning? Torture. I sighed and decided to work on Dom’s paper first. Mine could wait. "You can do this Sharon" I whispered to myselfThree hours later, I’d done the research, pulled in some articles, and outlined everything. Using the speech typing tool helped speed things up. I wrapped up the entire work—from introduction to literature review and references. Clean. Precise. M
When loving you meant losing me Chapter Nineteen: The Weight Of Wanting More
I had the weekend to prepare for exams. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, I had to stop seeing Jayden for a while. We’d been spending so much time together—doing the things we both enjoyed, things I maybe enjoyed a little too much—and even though my body still tingled at the memory of our last weekend together, I knew I needed to focus. No distractions. Just me, my books, and maybe a little caffeine to keep me from collapsing halfway through.The thought of having a carryover in my final year was terrifying. My dad would probably kill me—or maybe not literally, but close. Things were tight at home, and he was already doing more than he could afford to make sure I stayed in school. I couldn’t let any of his efforts go to waste. All I’d ever wanted was to make my parents proud. They went through a lot every single day just to keep me going, and the guilt of knowing that weighed heavier than any textbook I had to read. Our school fees had been increased by ten percent that semester—j
