Lahat ng Kabanata ng Her deepest desire: Kabanata 51 - Kabanata 60
60 Kabanata
Chapter 51 - Fully adjusted
“Thank you for yesterday,”I say to Gabriel as he floats us around the pool. Today we decided to take full advantage of the facilities; we’re enjoying a day in the sun. Together! I’m so much calmer now, seeing Rose and having that talk with her gave me perspective. I need to be more open with Gabriel and share with him my feelings. It won’t be easy and I might slip back into my old habits but I am more conscious and actively trying to connect with him. “You’re welcome.” He says looking at me intently. He’s giving me that look he gave me on our first date. That one terrified me but now I know what it means. It doesn’t scare me now; I look for it in his eyes to remind me I’m in the right place in his arms. He seems calmer too. He is morphing back into that in charge and in control man. I guess our talk last night, put him at peace too. He has this look in his eyes like he knows something I don’t. I want to get into his head and hear all his deepest thoughts. What is he cooking up in
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Chapter 52 -Rethink
Life is different, I feel different. The things I found joy in a few months ago don’t make me happy anymore. I used to love going to work; being of service to my boss would give me this sense of belonging. But now I just go through the motions of my work days and forget about it as soon as I get home. I look forward to the end of the day as soon as I get to work. There is a shift in my heart. I know it and I find myself accepting it without fear or question I never imagined I would be those people who dread going to work. I love my job, or more accurately I loved my job. Max is an amazing boss, our office is fun but I can’t seem to get back into my groove. I shake the feeling that I need to let go of this life and something greater will come to me. At first, I thought it was the stress. I told myself it will go away in a few weeks once everything settled down. I thought it was the moment and as soon as it passed I would go back to me. It’s been a month and the feeling hasn’t changed
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Chapter 53 - A new chapter
“I just want to say that I will miss you. I can’t imagine this office running without you but I’m so happy that you’re going out there to experience something new. I wish you all the best in your new endeavors. And just so you know, if you ever want your job back. T’s always here.” Max says at my farewell party. My two-week notice is over, I’m happy about this chapter of my life. But I can’t say I’m not terrified of what’s to come next. This is me taking a leap into the unknown. Who quits a job without a plan? I don’t know how I’m going to make money when I leave here. I am shaking in my boots but I’m up for it. This is by far the craziest thing I’ve done, ever! The whole room cheers for me and I smile shyly. I have to be the centre of attention but Max insisted we host a party for my last day here. I walk around the room thanking everyone. It’s only right that I say my proper goodbyes; I worked with these people for a long time. “Thank you for everything Max, I truly appreciate yo
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Chapter 54 - Family
“Hey kid.” I hear someone say and turn around. Zan is standing in my bedroom doorway. I close my eyes and open them again, to make sure I’m not hallucinating; I stand up from my bed and take a deep breath and then let it out.“Hey.” I say and walk to my brother. I go in for a hug and we just hold each other for what feels like a long time. I can’t believe he’s here, I pour all my love into my hug.“Did you miss me?” He asks when I finally let him go. Tears run down my face uncontrollably. I nod and wipe them away but fail. There’s just so much emotion that my hands can’t keep up with the constant flow of water down my face. “I missed you too.” He says hugging me again. “It feels so good to see you alive and well.”He says his voice thick with emotion.“It feels so good to see you too.” I say so glad we’re talking. I was so worried about him. I didn’t
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Chapter 55 - Brotherhood
“This place is amazing.” Zan says looking out at the view in front of us. We’re in my parent’s backyard, looking at my father’s berry field. He hasn’t been here in a long time; I first brought him here when I bought the property. It was just a field then; now it’s a fully functioning farm. He’s seeing this view for the first time; I’ve seen it so many times. But seeing the look of awe on his face makes me see appreciate it more. It’s breath taking. It really is.” I say realizing that it’s so easy to take things for granted. I realize I took our friendship for granted once. Knowing that it’s on the line right now makes me rethink everything I have in my life. When he called me a week ago to say he’s coming back home and we should meet, I was happy. This is a chance to mend broken trust. I don’t know if he’ll be open to that but when I saw him drive up today he seemed different, even now standing next to him he seems resigned. I could be jumping the gun here but I have to be hopeful.
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Chapter 56 - No worries
It’s late evening; I’m with my parents in the kitchen. My father is washing the dishes, I’m drying and my mother is putting them away. Washing the dishes is my least favourite thing to do. I should really call Gabriel tonight, I miss him. I think it’s time I went back home. I can’t spend another week without him. I’m sure he misses me too. “I have a special delivery.” Zan says when he walks into my parent’s kitchen. My parents and I turn around to look at him. He’s been gone since morning, I did wonder if he would come home tonight. He’s well known for his disappearing acts. I was worried he left without saying goodbye. I have fears that he’ll leave home and I won’t see him again. Our new found understanding is fairly new so I worry that as soon as we go back tour normal lives we’ll fall back to old habits. I know I have to be patient and trust that we can work this whole thing out but I get scared sometimes. He’s my brother and I love him. He moves away from the doorway and loo
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Chapter - 57 Blended
I spent the whole morning with Gabriel’s parents. His father gave me a tour of the whole farm; we spent the morning going through his daily chores. Gabriel had a full day of work so I had to do my own thing today. His dad was more than happy to spend the day with me. I got to see what it really takes to run a fully functioning farm.It’s amazing to see where Gabriel gets his work ethic. They both love what they do, they treat their employees with so much respect and they are always so eager to share information with others. I enjoyed my time with him, he’s a cool dude.Now I’m making lunch with his mom. She’s her husband’s complete opposite, where he’s talkative and smiley. She’s quiet and reserved. Now that I spent more than a few hours with his parents I can tell Gabriel us the perfect blend of the two of them. He took his father’s work ethic and commanding presence and his mother’s calm.  &ldqu
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Chapter 58 - A tide
Johannesburg  “You look incredible.” Says to me as we walk into a dinner party hosted at the Levelthree in Joburg. He asked me to be his plus one tonight and I had to come through for my man. It’s a networking event for South Africa’s most rich and influential. The event is hosted by one of Gabriel’s friend a young business woman named Maite, she owns one of the biggest beauty brands in South Africa.I am obsessed with her, she has one of the most incredible minds. She started her beauty business out of her university dorm and now she is one of the richest women in Africa. My mind is blown being here; I am doing my best to contain my excitement. Maite is legendary and I feel so grateful for Gabriel, he’s the reason I’m here.On a normal day I could have gotten a ticket to get in here and interact with the people here at arm’s length but being here with him is so much
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Chapter 59 - For Life
“Ryan baby, wake up.” Gabriel says kissing me. I slowly come out of sleep. I blink looking at him confused. He’s sitting next to me on the bed. He’s fully dressed in sweats and t-shirt. Why isn’t he naked? We went to sleep butt naked last night.“What time is it?”I ask looking out the window, it’s still dark. Am I missing something? Today is Sunday, we have nowhere to go. So why do we need to wake up early?“5:59.” He says touching my face softly. I lean into his touch closing my eyes, feeling sleep come back slowly. I don’t want to get out of bed, it’s so comfortable here.“I want to show you something.” He says and I groan. Can’t it wait? I don’t want to go anywhere.“Right now?” I ask and he chuckles softly, I open my eyes looking at him. He’s not budging; he really wants me to get out of bed. I sit up slowly and stretch. He looks at my nak
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Chapter 60 - Pure bliss
One year later “Gabriel what do you have planned tonight?” I ask my husband when he leads me into the garden in my pyjamas. It’s a Friday night and in our household, it means an adventure is due. We work hard during the week so that we can take time out on the weekends and have fun. We’ve been having these epic weekends since the day we got married. Gabriel and I have taking turns planning incredible dates. It can be a weekend long affair or just one night. As long as we show the love we have for each other; we have created so many memories together. It feesl like I’m living s dream. Gabriel is the ultimate romantic, he comes up with these incredible and thoughtful dates. I’m good at planning a great night but this man takes my breath away every time. Sometimes it’s not even about what we do, he has a knack for knowing what I need at the right moment. “I thought we would have a simple night in. I heard that tonight would be a good night to stargaze.” He says leading me into the gar
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