Todos os capítulos de WITH STRENGTH IN THE HEART : Capítulo 11 - Capítulo 19

"What are you..." I want to be sure of what I think, I want to be sure of what I've been told, I want to be sure of what's in your heart."I already told you once.... I repeat the same question to you Do you still think I'm doing it to keep my promise?""You... you have a lot of loyalty to my father" I answer him very uneasily, he nails his gaze that doesn't let me blink."I have loyalty to you..." he answers me without adding more, he looks at my lips without dissimulation, I without knowing what to answer him remained in total silence, without words, only confusion.... My heart beats very strong "I will make you feel as uncomfortable as possible every time you feel alone" he smiles, he gets up without saying any other comment leaving me with more doubts.He somehow overwhelms me, he stays in my mind without knowing why and only makes me feel a pit in my stomach like I'm

That night was not difficult to master. I fall asleep smoothly from the horrible psychological exhaustion, I begin to dream of a memory, the memory of the firefly garden. I was with my mother, Satoshi and Soshi when we were children and we watched the stars and some fireflies lighting up the dark sky...."Mom, look!" my smiling little girl pointed before my mother died, a week before she passed away. The star I pointed to was a shooting star."Make a wish, dear" she said so lovingly, her image will never fade from my mind. I closed my eyes making that inner wish."What did you wish for?" asks little Satoshi."I'm not going to tell you, it's se-cret" I stuck out my tongue amused "it's secret...""Come on! Tell me" he insisted."I wished... That we'll always be together" I smiled at him. Remembering this, I could fee

The next morning, Satoshi was gone; I woke up and he left without saying goodbye. I guess it was normal for him to be upset with me; I hurt him and even we all hurt each other, I also insulted Hiroki last night; and for a change ending up in a mess with Satoshi, this is getting out of hand; every day there are problems, there is always an argument to deal with, confusions come, fear.... And say "I don't know what to do anymore".In my head everything is spinning, my thoughts are tangled, things are going from bad to worse, but somehow, I need a solution from the smallest to the one that is affecting me the most. I give a long sigh of stress, get out of bed, put on some slippers and leave the mansion to clear my mind.I try to breathe in the fresh air and see the quietness of the morning, it was the only thing that brought me peace. I start to think: "if I'm not the woman Hiroki really loves... I think I have to accept it even though I deny it, who would re

When I was a child, my mother used to tell me that I had to be wise in choosing a husband. She was always very fond of Satoshi, it was likely that she would have liked to have chosen him, I wondered if she would think the same of Hiroki, would she have the same affection? Would she accept him? My father wanted this for my welfare, both mine and that of the kingdom. Even though I had refused, it's ironic isn't it? From going from refusing to be compulsorily married to Hiroki, loving Satoshi, I ended up doing the opposite. I love Hiroki and I no longer want to marry Satoshi, I ended that relationship, something I didn't want to happen before, what would my mother think about it? Probably my father would have told me "I told you so" with a mocking smile as he used to do when I was little and I was very stubborn, in that aspect I haven't changed... I'm still a very stubborn girl, I'm changing but I'm still the same... I look at the sky nostalgic watching

I had a dream, a very strange dream, a dream where I was in the palace, in the courtyard where the fountain was and admired the crystal clear water dripping and the darkness of the cold night that sheltered the nostalgic atmosphere. I had my princess and high class clothes, I felt strange to have to wear this again, I got used to have comfortable clothes, I feel free and at ease.I hear my father calling me from the throne room, I just followed the sound of his voice. I enter the palace confused, a shiver runs down my back and I do not find my father. On the king's throne there was only a shadow, the figure of a woman, tall, the palace dark and gloomy; there were no lanterns, I did not recognize her face, she was just sitting there, then everything was on fire and the woman disappeared, she suddenly scared me and I jumped.It was already daylight, I remembered that I had stayed in Soshi's room for two days to sleep, since Hiroki and I didn't talk again since the fight in the forest an