April 22, 2009   Jasper I laid the white roses on her grave. The weather seemed to reflect my feelings as rain clouds suddenly covered the sun and thunder roared after a flash of lightning shot across the sky. “Hi, Dais. So, um, I met a girl. Her name's Lucille. She’s beautiful, smart, kind and funny. Well to tell you the truth she’s just like you. I miss you so much, you know that? Um, I’m..I’m really sorry I couldn’t help you before. For not noticing that you were suffering. I’ve hated myself for it. Lucille tells me I should let go of my anger and guilt and shame. And I'm trying, Dais. She makes me want to live life again and to let myself be loved. I’m so in love with her.” The drople

R.E.S.P.E.C.T   April 22, 2009 Lucille    I was dying to kiss him. Looking into his eyes, a part of me wanted to give in, while the other part of me, who was holding on to the trauma of being cheated on, kept blowing the "you're being a sluty idiot again" whistle. With our lips only inches apart, I closed my eyes and moved my head forward, surrendering to the pleasure I knew our kiss would bring. But my eyes flew wide open when my lips smacked on his palm as Jasper pushed my face away with his big hand shouting,  "No. No. No. No, Lu. I won't allow you to use my body for sex again." "What?!" I glared at him, moving back to the other side of the couch. 

Two old Friends Talking Again   April 23, 2009 Jasper "Here, dear, have some bacon and eggs. Do you want coffee or juice?" Lucille's mom said, putting a heap of bacon and two sunny side ups on my plate.  "Thank you, ma'am. Coffee is fine. Thanks." I smiled at her and began eating. I noticed how Lucille had her mom's eyes and smile, but the rest of her face she got from her dad.  Lucille sat between Boo and me. She was eating quietly and avoiding eye contact with the both of us. Boo and I on the other hand, kept glaring at each other whenever we had the chance. The truth was, I wanted to knock the daylight out of him for ruining my plans with Lucille. 

Challenge Accepted   April 23, 2009 Boo   I chewed my steak for less than five seconds and swallowed.  I was eating like someone was chasing me. Never in my privileged life had I been so hungry and tired at the same time. And it was still the first challenge. It’s not like I was complaining, I mean, I work out in my gym, but not under the burning sun dehydrating me. Lucille smiled at me as she poured some cold apple juice in my glass. Even though exhaustion made me want to lie on the ground and sleep, I couldn't help but admit this was the most fun I've had in a really long time. There was a fleeting moment while running around from apple tree to apple tree that I remembered chasing Daisy in a vineyard once when we were in France. It was owned by one of my friends from college. 

A Fool's Goodbye   April 23, 2009 Lucille   Every time his fingers strummed the strings, my heart mourned. Every word that came out of his mouth brought me back to moments, minutes, days, months, and years and years of memories. Meeting him in high school, the first time he wrote and sang me a song, falling in love with him, places we’ve been, things we did, things we planned to do, the wedding I wanted and the kisses and love making we’ve shared all jumbled up inside me as he sang his new song. An apology for his betrayal. An apology for breaking my heart and crushing my world; because he knew for six long years he was my whole world. It was grueling, but I didn’t show him my tears. I literally bit my tongue hard to distract myself from the pain my heart was complaining of. Somehow, I managed to maintain a poker face all thr