Seeing Lochlann standing over me, his eyes hard and his jaw clenched, I wanted to throw myself under the bed and hide like a little kid. Instead, I was so startled that I yanked on my arm that had the IV in it, making the machine start beeping in warning.“What the hell?” I tried moving the IV stand, but it only kept beeping.“Unfold your arm,” said Lochlann, tapping on my forearm. I’d bent my arm in half, the IV line in the crook of my elbow. The nurse hadn’t been able to get a line into my wrist, citing that I had tiny veins that didn’t like needles. I hesitated at Lochlann’s command, and he sighed.“The line is kinked,” he explained. He took my arm and straightened it, and the machine finally decided it was going to shut up. Right then, a nurse came in. “I heard beeping. Everything okay?” She checked my IV and turned to me. “You’re looking a bit better, dear. How are you feeling? Any more nausea?”I blushed, wishing Lochlann would go away. “It’s better.”“Good. I’

My family was a little strange, but we were close. Since my sisters and I all still lived in town, we would go home for dinner a few times a month. The family party had expanded when Dani had started dating Jacob, and then Mari had married Liam. I’d been the one who’d never brought a boy home. Now two weeks into the quarter, I didn’t have a boy to bring home: I had a fetus to bring along with me. And because of that, I’d gotten out of the last two family dinners with excuses that I was too busy studying. My mom had texted me two days ago, asking me if I’d come to dinner on Sunday. We haven’t seen you in forever! she lamented, including a long line of sad emoji faces. And I know you need to use the washer and dryer at some point.Okay, she had me there. Although our apartment building had laundry, you had to use coins and it was a huge pain in the ass. My laundry was piling up, and I’d started wearing my underwear inside out to avoid going home to wash them.So much

As the quarter continued on, I found myself becoming immersed in schoolwork. It was a welcome distraction, what with the whole “living down the hallway from my baby daddy” thing. Every day when I came home from class, I passed by Lochlann’s apartment. More than once, I’d stood outside his door, my fist lifted to knock, only for me to chicken out and scamper home.Lochlann had been distant lately. He’d been attentive as much as he could be, but whenever I’d try to talk about anything other than the baby or mundane things like the weather, he’d immediately change the subject. Anything that alluded to me and him becoming an us was especially touchy.I knew we couldn’t be a couple. I knew that, and yet what I wanted refused to match up with what I knew was logical. I’d always prided myself on my ability to be practical, logical. Scientific. The data told me the fallout from being open about our relationship would be worse than being together would be good.I knew that. I’d even written

I’d never been one to work on my research with anyone else, unless I had to for some reason. I preferred to work alone, without the chatter of another person filling my ear. One time, when Sophie and I had first started dating, I’d brought her to the lab to see me work, but it had ended in a fight on the way home.You ignored me the entire time! she’d accused.I was working!I should’ve known at that point that things between us weren’t going to work out. Sophie needed more from me than I could give her. She wanted the kind of undivided attention that simply wasn’t possible from someone like me.Sophie had never understood why I’d found biofuels more interesting than her. I’d tried on more than one occasion to explain exactly what my research entailed, but she’d yawned and told me she had no idea what I was talking about.How had we dated for so long? I thought to myself. We were obviously incompatible.After Sophie had thrown her engagement ring in my face, she’d started dating

After the incident in the lab, Kate began to avoid me. I’d text her, but she’d respond hours later. At one point, she’d gone silent for so long that I’d banged on her door, terrified something was wrong. She’d looked at me like I was insane.“Why aren’t you answering your phone?” I demanded, wincing internally at how I sounded.“Because I’m busy? I have work to do, too, you know.” Her eyes were sad for a moment before she added, “If you don’t actually need anything...”Then she shut the door in my face.It didn’t help that I was torn between confronting Liz and hoping she hadn’t seen anything. When days passed and nothing happened, I could almost believe it had been a false alarm. She would’ve gone to the dean already. If she waited too much longer, she’d have to wait until after the Thanksgiving holiday. Apparently Americans took their turkey and football very seriously.Yet Kate avoiding me gave me a bad taste in my mouth. As Thanksgiving approached, she only became icier to me.