DYLAN POV  I park my truck the best I can in one of the open parking spots. There is no way I am driving home currently. I can't even see my hands on the steering wheel. I sob as tears streak down my face. Hailey's beautiful broken eyes are burned in my mind.   Rage at my own idiocy bubbles to the surface and I yell. I punch my steering wheel repeatedly causing the horn to go off several times. I bang my head against the unyielding wheel while cuss words scream from my mouth. The sounds of her heart breaking are replaying over and over in my ears. Repulsion with myself consumes my heart.   How could I do that to her? Why did I keep them? This morning her joking jab had stung my heart and I had really considered deleting all the disgusting images off my phone. But I didn't. Once again I was weak and decided I needed them. I had even smiled at Trish after dropping Hailey off at first period, because of the shot she had sent me. 

   DYLAN POV      Three weeks. Three weeks of torture but it is about to get so much worse Christmas break starts Friday and I won't be seeing her except for Sundays. I finally stopped texting her. I need to leave her alone.      Curt, Colt, and I haven't really spoken to each other either. Football is over and I drive myself to and from school. So I really don't see them. Graham and Jasmine broke up. Graham found out she was messaging Eric. He has been just as mopey as me. Luke the poor guy tries to keep our spirits up.......but it's not use.    I no longer attend meetings but I still talk to Benjamin. (mentor) Dad and I both agreed that I was doing great. And that the class was more awkward then beneficial. I still miss the high of watching porn or sleeping with girls, but if it isn't Hailey, I don't want it.   I get home and throw my keys on the kitchen counter. I shut t

DYLAN POVI follow dad's SUV with butterflies in my stomach. After watching Hailey and Curt walk the stage we had all met outside to take pictures. Hailey and I hadn't spoken but everytime I looked at her she was looking at me and vice versa. Curiosity about what she was thinking is still eating me alive. Is she happy? Upset about seeing me? Does she miss me like I miss her? I wish I was Shawn. I wish I got to hold her hand or listen to her rambling about right from wrong. To hear her laugh at my jokes or to send me the "be nice" look. I sigh as I pull BB into the drive. I haven't had a single girl in my truck since the night Hailey broke up with me. I wish I knew what her perfume was. I would have it as a permanent air freshener. I head to the backyard. Mom has everything decorated to the nines. Balloons and banners are everywhere, just like they had been at my party. I open the iron gate and let my eyes scan the already growing crowd.

DYLAN POV  Swimming was amazing. Hailey was so carefree. She laughed and swam like she didn't have a worry in the world. Everytime she grazed me, I had to seperate myself though. She was activating a part of me that I have put into hibernation and to be honest, it scared me.   Last time we were together I controlled those urges by using porn. This time I have nothing to take that edge off. I never want to become sexually frustrated with Hailey. She deserves romance and courtship. She deserves a ring and commitment, which I want to give to her, but I can't right away. We have to rebuild and thats the part I fear. My desires being unmanageable while we get to know each other again.   My only relief was during our rounds of chicken. Curt and Leena kept challenging us to the the game even though we won every round. But with Hailey out of sight and my focus on competition I was able to put lust in the back of my mind. Her thighs and privat

Shout out to Breajah and Anar17Thank you for your comments and love. FOUR MONTHS LATER THANKSGIVINGHAILEY POVI bounce in the passenger seat of BB and Dylan laughs at me. I am so excited to see dad. This is the longest I have been away from him my entire life. Thanksgiving break had not come fast enough. Dylan and I are doing great. We both recieved job offers at H.E.B. and the income has been steady. School is going amazing and I have decided to focus on management classes. I'm still not 100% sure if that is my passion or destiny but I'm in no rush. My one area of concern is Curt. He has became a hermit. Leena finally confirmed that they are on a break but she didn't explain why. She has basically cut ties with me and it hurts. I mean for two years her, Curt, and Colt have been my best friends. Now both of them are closing themselves off and not allowing any kind of help in. Curt refused to even drive back with us fo