Semua Bab LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT : Bab 31 - Bab 40
69 Bab
CHAPTER 30
“. . . If she’s telling the truth about trying to call you, she may well be telling the truth about everything else, right?” He hid a wince as Lisa verbalized the words he had been unable to speak, and his eyes shut in horror at the mere idea of such an atrocity. God, how could he live with himself if his terrible treatment of her since her return had been unjustified? He met Rick’s gaze, wondering if the misery and overwhelming dread he felt were evident in his eyes.“She also said that she wasn’t there when I had my accident. That she didn’t leave me to . . .” He couldn’t even bring himself to say it, realizing now how ridiculous it was to believe that his soft-hearted wife would ever leave him, or anyone else for that matter, injured and alone at the scene of an accident. He sat down on the closest chair with a thump, feeling bewildered and sick to his stomach.“Oh my God,” he groaned. “Oh my God! I was so determined to blame her for this, but what if I was wrong, Rick? Do you know
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CHAPTER 31
“The night you left,” he began quietly, trying to keep his voice level and calm, not wanting to come across as accusatory or angry. “After my accident,Cindy , I swear I saw you in the crowd and, even though I knew that I was the one who had driven you out of the house in the first place, in my mind, abandoning me there was completely unforgivable. I know that my reaction to your pregnancy was cruel and unwarranted, but despite that, you were my wife, the person I depended on the most, the woman who claimed to love me, and you left me there! It made no sense to me and it hurt so damned much. It also gave me an excuse to hate you because feeling anything other than that was just too . . .” He broke off awkwardly, aware of her frown and her confusion.“Gerard , I wasn’t . . .” she began but he held up a hand.“Please . . . I . . . let me speak.” He shut his eyes painfully. “I remember it so vividly; I looked up and saw you standing there on the fringe of the gathering crowd. You looked c
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CHAPTER 31
“ I can’t fix this,” he admitted bleakly. His voice was quivering in a way that would have killed his pride if he had been able to hear it. “I don’t know how to.” He looked strangely defenseless with his messy hair and his disheveled clothing, but she steeled herself against his vulnerability. While she was happy that he now knew the truth, the simple fact of the matter was that she couldn’t trust him with her heart. It had never been safe with him, but she hadn’t known it until he had so ruthlessly rejected her two years ago. Yes, he was now filled with regret about the mistake he had made immediately following his accident, but he still had no explanations or apologies for the behavior that had driven her out in the first place.She did not know what to say to him, did not know what she wanted from him anymore. Just the day before she had idealistically and unrealistically imagined that if they tried to get along, their relationship would improve and they could build on that. Of cou
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CHAPTER 33
“Well there is no more marriage, is there?” he droned tonelessly. “This house is big enough for us to live completely separate lives. We could work out some kind of schedule, times you may need certain areas of the house to yourself. Please don’t reject the idea out of hand just because it came from me. It makes sense and you won’t be killing yourself trying to make ends meet. I won’t interfere with your life at all.”“What about your work?” she asked when his eyes were on her again.“I work mostly from home these days.” He shrugged and she hesitated, her mind busily going over every angle of his plan. “I do plan to spend some more time in the office in the future, but we have an excellent in-house day-care facility, so she’ll never be too far from me.”“This can’t be a permanent arrangement,” she said after a long pause, knowing that she was compromising way too much. Her instincts were screaming at her to move out, but she kept thinking of Kayla and how much she adored her father. “
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CHAPTER 34
She was making new friends at school, and she spent a lot of time with Lisa and Alice as well as with Lisa’s cousin, Theresa. The latter was a year older than Cindy’s twenty-eight and had a six-month-old baby girl. They (unimaginatively) called themselves the “Mummy Club” and spent most Saturdays actively avoiding mummy duty by leaving the babies with their husbands and escaping for a well-deserved girls’ day out. They were all busy women: Lisa had her shop, Alice was a chef, and both Theresa and Cindy had just started studying again, Theresa only part-time because of the new baby.Cindy was actually starting to enjoy her life again, despite the unusual situation at home. Soon she started noticing that one of her professors, a man in his mid-thirties, appeared to be taking more than the usual interest in her. She didn’t quite know how to react to that fact. It had been so long since she’d felt even remotely attractive that the male interest, while flattering, was a little unnerving. It
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CHAPTER 35
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,” she apologized, both verbally and in the sign language that she was still trying to learn in her free time. Because of school, her lessons had had to be moved to Saturdays before her usual get-together with the other ladies. His eyes dropped to her busy hands and narrowed sharply as they took in the graceful movements of her fingers.“It’s okay,” he said out loud, shrugging slightly. He didn’t mention the sign language she had used, and she was both relieved and somewhat disappointed by that. He brushed by her and headed toward the large wooden island in the middle of the kitchen to drop the ingredients on the black marble–topped surface, while Cindy used a damp paper towel to wipe up the mess on the floor. When she was done, she rounded the island to face him again while he busily went about constructing an imaginative sandwich. He kept his eyes on his task and Cindy sighed in frustration before waving her hand beneath his eyes to get his at
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CHAPTER 36
“Get out of here,” he whispered harshly, wanting her out of the room, not wanting her to hear or see how much he ached to take her into his arms.“What?”“Get the hell out,” he snarled, bracing himself before turning to face her. He barely kept himself from flinching when he saw her tears. “Go now.” She uttered a low cry and whirled from the room, fleeing as quickly as she could. Gerard finally allowed himself to break, sinking back against a tiled wall as his legs gave out and sliding down to the floor. He clasped his head in his hands and shook uncontrollably as he tried to imagine his life from this point on.Gerard had to go in to the office the following morning—the day of Cindy’s Big Date. He hadn’t done so in months, but he and Pierre had an urgent meeting with a very important client and the man had requested Gerard’s presence. As he was the business’s CFO and Vice President of Marketing, Gerard knew that it was time to pick up the reins of his life again. He had responsibilit
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CHAPTER 37
Cindy could barely focus on what Raymond was saying; her mind kept straying back to the lonely image of Gerard sitting in front of that television with her image frozen on-screen. There was something so stark, sad, and desolate about the memory that it ate her up inside every time she thought about it.“You seem preoccupied.” Raymond’s gentle voice intruded on her thoughts, and Cindy was startled back to the present and the man sitting opposite her. He really was a nice man, tall, lean, and almost handsome, with dark eyes, slightly thinning black hair, and a warm smile. Cindy really liked him but not enough to seriously consider dating him.“I think this was a mistake,” she mumbled, and he frowned. “It’s too soon. It just doesn’t feel right for me to be out with you.” He smiled in understanding.“I was wondering where your mind was,” he said.“Maybe . . .” she began, and he covered one of her helplessly fluttering hands with his own.“Some other time?” he completed, and she nodded gra
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CHAPTER 38
“Come on, Kayla, time to get dressed.” She held out her hand to the toddler who happily made her way over, still chattering excitedly about “Nebo” and “fishies.”The Two Oceans Aquarium was based at the V&A Waterfront in Cape Town. It was teeming not only with marine life but with children, teens, students, and noisy families. Gerard and Cindy , as a young couple with an energetic toddler, blended in completely. For once the ubiquitous Cal and his team had been told to remain very much in the background. Gerard had commanded them to remain outside, despite Cal’s obvious uneasiness with the high security risk such a busy place posed. Gerard had even chosen to drive them himself—a rarity these days—while the security team had remained a discreet distance behind them.Now Cindy was achingly aware of how much like a normal family they must look amidst the tide of humanity. Kayla was up on Gerard shoulders, and her little feet frantically paddled against his chest every time she wanted him
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CHAPTER 39
“You shut yourself in,” she completed, and he nodded.“It’s crazy, I know,” he confessed, and she smiled with a shake of her head, covering his lightly trembling hand with her own.No, it’s not. You lost one of your senses, Gerard . Naturally there’d be physical, mental, and emotional repercussions. I read that people go through the stages of grief after losing their hearing. Did you . . . did you talk to anyone after the accident?”“You mean a psychiatrist?” he clarified dryly. “I was seeing one for nearly a year; it’s because of him that I was able to even contemplate coming out today. I was so much worse immediately after the accident and I very stubbornly refused to talk to anyone. Yes, I was in denial and furious that something like this could have happened to me, but I shoved it aside because I had something bigger to take care of. I was adamant that talking to shrinks could wait. But Pierre and Rick kind of forced my hand. They blackmailed me into seeing someone.”“How?” she as
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