My Husband Wants An Open Marriage のすべてのチャプター: チャプター 31 - チャプター 40

~~Julie~~In my dream, I’m floating somewhere soft and far away. And then—bang—the calm shatters, replaced by a loud, insistent pounding. Someone is knocking on a door, and it sounds like they’re one bang away from kicking it down. I bury my face deeper into my pillow, hoping the noise will stop. But it doesn’t.Thump. Thump. Thump.Groaning, I open my eyes and squint at the clock on my nightstand. 4:47 a.m. It’s basically the middle of the night. Who in their right mind is awake at this hour?I drag myself out of bed and stumble to the door, throwing it open. And there, in all his early morning glory, stands Luke. “Morning, Julie,” he says.He’s in workout clothes. The shirt stretches across his chest and shoulders in ways that should be illegal. His shorts fit just right, showcasing his toned legs, and don’t even get me started on the definition of his arms. A faint sheen of sweat is already on his brow, like he’s fresh from a warm-up. I can barely believe he’s a real human being,

Luke tries to say my name, gentle and calm, but I’m too far gone. The words spill out of me, raw and unfiltered, every ugly, twisted thought I’ve been trying to keep down coming to the surface like a wave I can’t hold back.“Don’t you get it? I was the problem. I was the one hanging on to something broken from the start, and everyone else could see it but me. He was with her, Luke. Sleeping with her right under my nose, while I kept pretending we could fix things.” I let out a bitter laugh, and my voice cracks. “I kept telling myself that we’d get through it, that he loved me enough to stay. But the truth is, I was lying to myself, wasn’t I?”Luke’s face is full of something I can’t quite read. Maybe he wants to argue, or maybe he just feels sorry for me. His voice is rough, barely a whisper. “You weren’t lying, Julie. You trusted him. That’s not a crime.”“Isn’t it?” I feel my hands shaking in my lap, every word scraping out of me. It hurts. “Then why do I feel like an idiot? Like I’

I don’t bother correcting him, just smile back at the woman, letting her read whatever she wants into the silence. She beams at me, her whole face lighting up with genuine warmth, before turning back to Javier and fixing him with a raised brow.“Lucas has a girlfriend?” she says. “When did that happen?”“Recently,” Javier replies, his eyes fixed on me with a look that suggests he’s more interested in studying my reaction than actually answering her question.I offer a polite nod to the woman before making my way over to a nearby table, where I place my laptop and settle into a chair, still within earshot of their conversation. As I power the laptop on, I hear the woman’s voice call over to me.“Would you like some chilaquiles for breakfast, Julie?” she asks. “I just finished making them. Javier didn’t tell me we had company, but thank God Lucas didn’t eat his. He was in a hurry when he came down. You can have his. Paula will make you fat and healthy.”I blink, taken aback. “Oh, right.

I blink, feeling the weight of Maya’s words settle on me. “What? Why would I have to move out?”She doesn’t look up, busy packing her notes, her movements brisk and businesslike. “It’s for your own good,” she says. “If we’re playing by Ryan’s rules, we need to look spotless—inside and out. Living with another man in the middle of divorce proceedings? It’s not a good look, Julie. Not for the judge, not for the court, not for anyone who’s watching.”I sink back in my chair, letting out a sigh that feels like it’s been building all day. “An hour ago, I thought we were just going to have a civil conversation about this. And now we’re here, strategizing like it’s a battlefield.”Maya glances at me, a hint of sympathy in her eyes. “Civil?” She shakes her head. “Julie, this is divorce. Civility is an endangered species.”A bitter laugh escapes my lips, more acidic than I expected, and I realize it’s the first genuine reaction I’ve allowed myself all day. “I’ll…think about it, I guess.”“Thin

Her gaze meets mine, and the intensity in them makes my heart race. “I thought…” she says. “I thought we could just enjoy this. But you’re right. It is more.”“More?”“Yeah, more. But I’m scared.”“Scared of what?” I ask, brushing my thumb over her cheekbone. “Of feeling too much? Of getting hurt?” “Of it all. I’ve been through so much.”I nod, absorbing her words. I can see the pain lurking just beneath the surface, a shadow that threatens to swallow her whole if she lets it. “Julie, I get that. But you’re not alone in this. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. We can take it slow, figure it out together.”“You really mean that?”“Absolutely,” I promise, meaning every word. “But I need you to trust me.”Her breath hitches, and I can feel the weight of the moment hanging between us. “Okay,” she says. “I’ll try.”“Good.” I lean in, brushing my lips against her forehead. “That’s all I ask.”We settle into a comfortable silence. I feel her heartbeat steadying against my chest, and it c