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Chapter Twenty-One

JEROME Lisa and Stacy appeared in front of me as I was paying for my drink. Lisa tapped my shoulders and plastered a smile on her face when I turned. Stacy was just joining us. “You found me,” I said. “Yeah, we found you. No biggie.” Lisa stared ahead of me. “Did you get something for us?” “Do you guys want something?” Lisa gave me an out-of-mind stare, like her answer to that wasn’t so obvious. It was. But person I wanted to hear from was Stacy. Her face was bare, brows matted with little droplets of sweat, thanks to the humid temperature of the day. As soon as she walked in, she was easily the person I had looked at the most in the last five seconds and when she casually glanced up, she tried to smile. I knew she was trying because she failed terribly at it. Perhaps she wasn’t even trying, only wanted to look like she was trying to be okay. She must have a lot she wanted to say. She always looked that way and the only time I can say we’ve had a proper conversation, one that

Chapter Twenty-Two

STACY“You keep things bottled in. It’s not good,” Jerome said.I wanted to laugh and tell him what he was saying didn’t make sense but it did and I was in no rush to bring our conversation to an end. It was going so well.I was actually having fun in his house and not lurking in a dark corner alone and dejected.“I don’t want to keep them in.” That was my explanation.“But you do,” Jerome insisted.I was lying on my stomach, facing him as he sat on the floor, knees bent in front of him.After he spoke, he leaned his head back into the wall behind me, partly staring up at the ceiling.He wasn’t done talking as he picked off from where he left.I didn’t mind. I didn’t have a pack of answers tucked away somewhere that I was going to pull out and hand to him as my excuses so I welcomed his words before they even left his lips.“When you bottle things in, it never goes well for you. I’ll show you the circle you’re throwing yourself into.” For this part, Jerome dropped his chin and counted

Chapter Twenty-Three

STACYFirst day of school. I could totally do it. I only had to act like I was confident and not be afraid to talk my shit. One thing that would really help me face this day properly would be running into Jerome.The chances were low and it was very unlikely, I think Lisa even mentioned that he had something to get to outside of school.I wasn’t going to run into him. He was nowhere in the flood of bodies that swarmed through the halls and pathways. He wasn’t the boy who skated past me and blew a ‘sorry’ my way when he whipped through my right. He wasn’t the girl with two swinging braids who bumped into me when she was calling to her friend. He wasn’t the group of guys whose laughter managed to be the loudest and the one distinct sound that existed at the moment.My bag was strapped around my shoulders and I held onto the strap, needing something to be with me as I faced the day. It was something to hold, something that didn’t make me feel alone.Why did Lisa’s faculty have to be away

Chapter Twenty-Four

JEROMEI spent five minutes early this morning, staring at my bike at the garage.I should go out on it. I mean, I got the bike for a reason. I didn’t use it when Stacy and Lisa were around because I couldn’t possibly pick them up or drop them on the bike. I didn’t use it a few days before because I didn’t think I was in the right frame of mind to be riding it.The silver shiny metal, chunk of engine and tyres had a way of bringing out the demon in me so I left it to avoid getting myself in an accident.Today was different, right? I wasn’t sad or angry, I didn’t feel negative emotions and this was because I didn’t see the reason to have them. Not today, not when I had lunch with Miles.He was the director who was in charge of bringing the script to life, my script hopefully if he likes it.I had never met Miles but we had spoken over the phone as well as through some Zoom meetings. He had fat cheeks which were a contrast to his thinly frame. In all his pictures, there was always a base

Chapter Twenty-Five

JEROMENattie was the first person that called me when I was just opening my front door. Never had anybody been on such perfect timing but then again, who was I kidding? We had a connection like that.“Mr. Jeremy, my favorite teacher.”I didn’t realize I rolled my eyes until I did. Unable to hold the laughter from spluttering out of my lips, I stopped trying.“Your favorite teacher?” I asked.Nattie made a sound low in her throat and the blood shot down to my stomach. I almost forgot how good she sounded and I wanted to fault myself, to look at me with pity for getting turned on just by a mere sound.I would have done that if I didn’t know that what she did was intended to get to me in that way. Why else would she just moan unprovoked, into my fucking ears.I pushed my door open. “What do you want, Nattie?”She started to laugh, light soft giggles that reminded me of a million nights.I wasnt proud of the relationship we had, of all the things we had done to each other, on each other,

Chapter Twenty-Six

STACYMAX: I look forward to Mondays now.STACY: Nobody looks forward to Mondays.MAX: Because they don’t get to sit with you on Mondays.I bit my bottom lip, desperately trying to end the blush that was creeping up my fac. It spread from my neck to my cheek and strained till it even neared my forehead. This much redness wasn’t what I was used to so I slipped my phone into my pants pocket and bit my lip again before pushing my dorm door open.I was also trying to trace how and when we got to this point, Max and I. After our class last week, he followed me around campus until I agreed to give him my number, then he walked away when I was ordering a cup of coffee.I remembered feeling some type of way, like he didn’t really like me, like him getting my number successfully was just a way to massage his ego. Because why else would he leave me when we could finally sit down and have a conversation? But I’ll tell you this, we’ve been talking nonstop since then. At first, I didn’t reply to hi

Chapter Twenty-Seven

JEROMENattie’s house smelt like roses and citrus. The familiar scent of the place washed over me as soon as I stepped in and just like that, I had lost to the thoughts. I had forgotten to stop my mind from crossing the dangerous waters, from tethering on the edge of what we used to be, what we weren’t meant to be anymore.Nattie walked around her center table and stuck something on her bookshelf. It was a setup that housed more photos than books.Natalie took a lot of trips during the summer break and she lived to take pictures of the scenery she faced. It didn’t matter if it was a simple beach photo, something as magical as seashells or something as haphazard as her load before she stuffed them into the blue box. She always captured them in ways that made you stop and stare.There were about five of them, pictures. Two were on the lowest shelf level, one on the middle and the remaining at the edges of the highest shelf level. Nattie turned on her television. A sitcom was playing and

Chapter Twenty-Eight

STACYLisa was in the room with Bridget and I had given them some privacy. Now I knew that the way I felt on the first day I met her, like I was intruding on some private moment, was because I indeed was.The funny thing was we had not properly spoken about it. Somehow, between classes and turning in assignments, we had not had the time to have the conversation and it didn’t seem like a random conversation that could be brought up just in passing. I didn’t want to rush her and I was hoping that she would tell me soon in her own time.I crossed my legs and glanced in the direction of our dorm room. There was no sign of Lisa or Bridget. Today was Friday. The weekend was here again. The party for the new students had been shifted to Saturday instead of tonight for reasons unknown to me.I had heard the news from Karen but Max confirmed it over the phone. And yes, did I mention Max and I spoke over calls now more frequently? I think I was warming up to him, feeling more comfortable in his

Chapter Twenty-Nine

JEROMEStacy’s message buzzed my phone. The sound was short but loud enough that it got my attention, vibrating the desk on which I had dropped it. It was back in the room while I was on the balcony, staring at the darkening blue-black clouds.I don’t know who I was expecting it to be. Maybe Nattie, maybe Kingston. They were after all the last people I had spoken to before I got home and met Stacy and Lisa lounged on my couch, snacking on popcorn and watching a reality show. I also thought it could be someone from school, someone from the movie makers and because of all these maybes, I had forced myself to get up and check who was texting me at ten pm in the night.It wasn’t anyone of them, to my disappointment and also to my relief. It was Stacy. The last time Stacy and I texted…I couldn’t even remember the last time that happened.I found myself standing in the middle of my room, a soft breeze pushing in from the balcony doors, a light switch illuminating me and the rest of the room,

Chapter Thirty

STACY“I hate it,” I was telling Lisa.“I think it’s cute. It’s this little pixie bob look and I think she’s pulling it off well,” Lisa was not on board with me.“She was better with long hair.” I draped my hands over my chest and read the writings on the material.One word. One word I wished that I could be for real and for one person. It seemed that no matter what I did, we always ended up back where we started, fighting in that kitchen.TEMPTRESS was written with little glittering stones, bright pink, a shade more bubbly than the rest of the crop top.It was a cute small top and because of how small it was, it made my boobs look at least two times bigger. I loved it already and I was glad that I had gotten it from the walk in store when Karen dragged our asses to shop with her.She was going to get new clothes for the party and for a small class presentation that she had. we all ended up getting at least one thing, me, Lisa, and Karen. This little crop top had been my pick.Tonight,

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