~ GAVIN ~The last time I felt this kind of anxiety, I was nineteen, standing in a courtroom, waiting for a judge to decide the course of my life.Members of my family — nuclear and extended — filled the gallery behind me. Some wore sympathy on their faces; others barely hid their curiosity, eager to witness the downfall of Robert Kessler’s gifted son.But for all the people seated in the courtroom, my attention was on only one person. My mother. She was the one I was most ashamed of letting down. Most terrified of being away from. Most—“In the case of the State of Massachusetts vs. Gavin Kessler,” the judge’s voice cut through, measured and impersonal, “The court finds the defendant guilty on all counts. He is hereby sentenced to five years in prison.”The gavel struck. Final. And just like that, my fate was changed.Now, ten years later, my heart pounded the same way as I leaned over Max’s desk, watching lines of code crawl across his monitor’s screen, waiting for him to say so
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