Holt left on a Thursday.I knew because his handler filed the required forty-eight-hour notification and copied me as part of the operational oversight structure. Standard procedure. The notification was brief. Destination Rotterdam. Duration five days. Contact information for the duration. Return date confirmed.I read it and filed it and didn't think about it too much.Then I thought about it anyway.Eva found me in the operations room that afternoon looking at nothing specific on the screen in front of me."He'll be okay," she said."I know," I said."You're thinking about Sarah," she said."I'm thinking about a lot of things," I said. "Rotterdam is one thread in all of it."She sat down across from me."You've never fully processed what happened there," she said. Not as an accusation. As an observation from someone who had known me long enough to see the things I kept in the places I didn't examine regularly."I processed it," I said."You filed it," she said. "There's a differenc
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