All Chapters of Healing The Devil I Once Loved: Chapter 31 - Chapter 40

ZARIA 32:Three weeks.That was how long I had been in China. It felt like I had been here forever instead of three slow fucking weeks. Three weeks of waking up to the rooster that crowed angrily, the smell of boiled roots… Three weeks before my hands stopped trembling every time Uncle Thomas called my name.It was also a month and four weeks since I had been away from Renzo. The numbers mattered because they were the only things I could count without guilt. So I counted weeks by how much bigger my belly felt when I lay flat on the mattress Mama Li had given me.She told me to rest more.“You are doing much,” she had said, clicking her tongue. “Your body is already working.”But resting meant thinking. And thinking was dangerous.So I worked.The countryside had its own rhythm, one that didn’t care who you were before you arrived. People came at odd hours with coughs, fevers, stomach pains, and bad dreams they swore were caused by spirits hiding in the hills. Uncle Thomas handled mo

RENZO I stepped out of the stall, tugging my jacket straight, already preparing the mask I needed to put back on…only to find the last person I expected to see. She was standing near the sinks, perfectly still, as if she had grown there.For half a second, my brain refused to process it.“Ma!” I blurted. “Why are you standing there like a creep?”Ma turned her head slowly, eyes landing on me with a calmness that had unnerved grown men twice my size. I swallowed hard. Why was she staring at me like that?Her voice was condescending when she spoke. “I saw your pee pee when you were a baby until now. Don’t ask me such a stupid question.”I groaned, scrubbing a hand down my face. “Jesus—”“Language, my darling,” she said mildly, already moving.She ushered me out of the restroom with a light but immovable pressure on my arm. At the door, she paused, washed her hands carefully, and then reached into her handbag to pull out a small sanitizer bottle.She used it thoroughly.I stared. “You

RENZO While I escaped for the so-called fresh air, I thought about the man who dropped, foaming at the mouth. That was me about a month ago. Did even Zaria intend for me to die? If she really did, I wouldn't be alive anyway.I eyed the front door wearily. The media were already swarmed there for a different kind of spectacle: A dead man. Thankfully, this scandal wasn't mine, and it would buy me enough time to get away from everyone's prying eyes. Therefore, I took the side corridor that was forgotten down to the back of the building. The car was already there. I had asked an anonymous trusted driver to get it to the back of the building without anyone noticing. Who would have even guessed the car was mine?It was a matte-black Porsche which blended into the shadow as it belonged there.. which it did. Everything I owned belonged where I put it.I slipped inside without looking back.The door closed with a soft, expensive sound. I pulled away slowly, easing into the road. The Porsc

ZARIA Uncle Thomas moved first.He stepped into the yard slowly, like he was afraid that if he moved too fast, something would go wrong. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, and his hands were still stained green from the herbs he had been working with earlier.Up close, I could see the dirt under his fingernails. I was about to point that out…I couldn’t tell what he felt.Was he proud of me? Or angry? Or both?My throat felt tight as I cleared it. Before I could stop myself, I stepped toward him. Whatever punishment he had in mind, I would face it. I had acted without permission and in this place, that was not something done lightly.My arms tightened around the baby once more before I loosened my grip. I shifted her carefully, turning her head the way I had seen Uncle Thomas do countless times with injured animals—supporting the neck, keeping her close to my body. She was small, light, and… tiny.“Here,” I said quietly. “She’s alright.”Uncle Thomas stopped in front of me.

ZARIA I exhaled slowly and looked at him properly.Wang was still trying to solve me like I was a puzzle he’d been handed without the picture on the box. His brows were drawn together and his voice was soft in that way people use when they think softness equals safety.Oh, what a sweet guy. Note my sarcasm. “You really don’t know anything,” I said.He blinked. “About what?”“About what I’ve passed through,” I said evenly. “You know nothing about what it takes to wake up every morning and decide to still exist.”He opened his mouth, probably to apologize, reassure me, or do that thing humans do when they feel sympathy.Really? I cut him off.“Don’t,” I said. “You’re doing it again.”“Doing what?”“Fucking assuming!” I snapped. “Assuming I’m sweet… I’m fragile. Assuming you can figure me out if you just ask the right question.”His lips parted slightly. He looked genuinely confused now.I stepped closer, close enough that he had to tilt his head back to look at me. “Remember when I